Paris Hilton Makes $347,000/Hour To Press Play

August 11th, 2014 // 35 Comments
$85 Fucking Million
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In a world where Kim Kardashian‘s app makes $85 million and Michael Bay movies dominate the box office, it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that Paris Hilton makes over six times the median yearly salary in the US in just one hour for pressing play. Page Six reports:

The 33-year-old hotel heiress has been living it up in in the Mediterranean where she’s taken up residency at Ibiza’s club Amnesia. Paris has reportedly made $2.7 million in the short span of four days on her two-month DJ tour.
“She’s making $2.7 million from the four nights – $347,000 an hour,” a source told The Sun (via AZ Central). “The crowds do seem to enjoy it but most are too off their faces to care that she’s simply pressed play on a Beyoncé megamix.”

When reached for comment, God responded: “What? I get bored giving little kids cancer. Sue me.”

Photos: INFphoto


  1. You know what, god? I think I will sue you. Call up Johnny Cochran. Oh, he’s in hell? Of course he is. He’s a lawyer.

  2. I’m just glad she found steady work. I was worried she was going to go broke. It’s not like she has a family fortune to fall back on, right?

  3. There you go, kids. Stay in school.

  4. Watch it Fish. Don’t you know being a DJ is real profession requiring years of skill-set building and excruciating mental and physical training, just like car racing. Deadmau5 would rewind your ass front to back over you insolence.

  5. Cock Dr

    Consider atheism, because there ain’t no benevolent overseer weighing the scales of justice & supervising the fall of every sparrow. It’s up to us to rush the DJ booth & end this farce.

  6. Don Draper's Dad

    Hey she worked really hard getting those mixes from other DJ’s, you guys. Really hard. Jaw clicked for a week afterwards.

  7. Is that why old people go to Spain? Because it’s 15 years ago there?

  8. “jesus wept !” Hellraiser

  9. Paris Hilton DJ
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s lookin’ quite trannyish as usual…..

  10. could be worse- she could be doing that here in the states.

  11. anonym


    why do all the stupid people get all the money

    • Anna

      Don’t believe any of this. It’s all hype and spin from her PR people.
      Having been to Ibiza I can tell you Amnesia is one of the biggest clubs on the island, but it is NOWHERE near large enough that they can to sell enough drinks and wrist-bands to justify paying Herpes $2.7M.
      Realistically she’s probably getting paid somewhere around $35k for the entire gig, unless her people are including a stash of coke and X that may be in her “secret hiding place”.

      • Short Round

        I don’t believe it either. Last I heard even top DJs make less. Wait a minute… it has to be a typo. It’s BJ not DJ.

  12. News like this doesn’t even affect me anymore, ’cause way shittier things are done by rich people/companies on a daily basis.

    For example – hey, did you know that King, the thiefy makers of Candy Crush Saga, try to trademarks the words “Candy” and “Saga” from basically very video games out there? Fucked up, isn’t it – especially in light of the fact those muthaphukers make about a million dollar A DAY on a game they completely stole from TONS of other companies!?

    ‘Learned all this today too… so, yeah, the Hilton thing is ridiculousness to the max, in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t surprise or upset me in the least.

  13. She’s got paid $2.7M for 4 days of work at a dance club? Just how much is the cover charge to get into this place? And does it come with sex?

  14. *every video games*

  15. Wally's Beaver

    Now she can get super sized supply of Valtrex.

  16. Paris Hilton DJ
    Commented on this photo:

    Yep, that crowed sure looks excited.

  17. Hmm

    I can’t believe people actually believe these bullshit numbers. If these people really made that kind of money they would own $50 million mansions and buy $30 million yachts and private jets.

  18. [Professor Farnsworth]

  19. Paris Hilton DJ
    Commented on this photo:

    “this klout score goes to 11.”


    “ooh! gilt has 40% off manolo blahnik today!”

  20. Dan

    Why is she alive and Robin Williams not? God the world is an unfair place.

  21. Blinky the one eyed fish

    The only way she’s making that kind of money is if she’s back to muleing ex and coke for Joe Francis.

  22. Paris Hilton DJ
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m sorry Miss Hilton they’re asking you to leave.”

  23. Paris Hilton DJ
    Commented on this photo:

    “…and the dick I had to suck to get this job was thiiiiisss big”

  24. John

    Hey everyone…LOOK, herpes is back in the lime light.

  25. Paris Hilton DJ
    Commented on this photo:

    “…but seriously folks, who thinks we ought to go back to gassing niggers, kikes, and fags?”

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