Pamela Anderson Is Probably Definitely Banging Julian Assange

You’re probably already thinking “Clickbait bullshit!” on this one, but hear me out. Pamela Anderson has been an activist for years — Yes, mostly for PETA horseshit, but it still counts! — plus she had sex with Kid Rock on multiple occasions, so her taste in men is questionable if not criminally insane. Which brings us to Pamela’s new boyfriend, Wikileaks founder Julian Assange, an activist and douche canoe of the highest order, who helped de-legitimize American presidential elections for lulz. Plus, I assume he can drive a boat with his dick now. She does have some standards. Via Page Six:

The Canadian-born blonde has visited Assange four times in the past three months at the Ecuadorean Embassy in London — where he’s been holed up for more than four years. “She seems to be wearing sexier outfits every time she visits,” one political activist observed.

They also highlight Anderson’s ties to Russia, so now the picture has become clear that Pam’s taken a page out of another fallen American starlet’s playbook when it comes to leading a new life of international philantroprostitution.

“So I just show up to charity events, sleep with billionaire criminals afterwards, and somehow I make money?”
“Si, and eet iz important to make zem pay upfront.”
“Ooh, is that stupid fake accent part of it? Because that’s a dealbreaker for me.”
“Eet iz not going zo well for me either, but I zort of ‘af to keep eet up now.”

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