Samantha Ronson beats Lindsay?
Gossip Cop has "debunked" recent reports claiming Samantha Ronson is physically abusing Lindsay Lohan:
Without furnishing any specific time or place where Ronson was allegedly "violent" with Lohan, RadarOnline quotes an unnamed source saying, "One time I saw her [Lindsay] and she had a large welt on her head... She told me that Sam beat the (bleep) out of her... She also said that Sam even punched and choked her one time."
Again, there isn't a single detail, just a so-called "source" making allegations.
When Gossip Cop contacted Lohan last week about an equally erroneous story about Ronson punching her in the mouth, the actress told us exclusively, "None of that is true."
I like Gossip Cop, but did they seriously just take Lindsay Lohan's word as a reliable source? Lindsay "I stopped sex trafficking in India with my collagen lips" Lohan? And if a history of compulsive lying isn't bad enough, for all we know she's getting the coke punched out of her by Lesbian Squiggy. I mean, Christ, it's a miracle she's not shitting in strangers' hats trying to repair the "time crystal."
Anna Torv probably could've picked a better topless pose
Because Esquire is apparently ditching the impeccably dressed male crowd in favor of sci-fi geeks, here's Fringe star Anna Torv posing half-naked for the March 2010 issue. That said, I have no explanation for why she's basically taking a topless dump. Maybe because I'm not fancy and my most expensive article of clothing has Iron Man on it, but who's to say really?
Continue Reading "Anna Torv probably could've picked a better topless pose"
Brad Pitt still loves a part of Angelina
Dear Every Woman Who Dreams of One Day Landing a Sophisticated Hollywood Dreamboat Who Won't Grope Your Chest at Random Moments Like Your Current Man,
NONE OF YOU ARE SAFE.
Love,
The Superficial
Olivia Munn is dead to me
Dane Cook posted a picture of himself with Olivia Munn at the Super Bowl yesterday and there's no way these two aren't fucking. If you're dumb enough to be photographed with Dane Cook at the start of your acting career, you're dumb enough to think his penis will make Chris Pine walk you down the aisle in a fit of jealousy then impregnate you with a boy and a girl - in that order - with British accents who wear pea coats all the time.
NOTE: For every single female reader who feels like I just read their mind, I know who you are and I saw what you did. Mwahahaha!
Reggie Bush is getting anal tonight
I may not like Kim Kardashian. I may think she's everything that's wrong with America if it had a giant ass and a penchant for trick photography. I might even nurse a theory that her entire family murdered Nicole Brown-Simpson then framed O.J. Simpson on the off-chance it would pay off with a reality show down the line. But there's one thing I'll give her: That ass is going to reward a Super Bowl champ tonight.
So here's to you, Kim. You earned it. -- Somehow. Maybe?
Scope Out (20) Pics of Kim and Reggie After the Jump
Anne Hathaway in British GQ
Because her chest makes me want to launch a war in Ancient Greece, here's Anne Hathaway in the latest issue of British GQ. If this spread is to help the world forget she dated an Italian con-man who pretended to be the Pope, they're working.
Or at least were until I typed that last sentence. Shit, now I feel bad she has no choice but to do Playboy.
*crosses fingers*
Lorraine Nicholson still wearing bikinis and other news
- ?uestlove sets the record straight about NBC's Black History menu yet still doesn't address the hateful lack of grape soda. "SWING LOW, SWEET CHARIOT!" [PopEater]
- Jessica Simpson is not fucking Taylor Kitsch. [Lainey Gossip]
- Mischa Barton is going to die soon. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]
- Brooklyn Decker might be your 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover. [Just Jared]
- Taylor Swift and John Mayer are having sleepovers now. [Celebslam]
- Miranda Kerr is a nude Mother Teresa. [Amy Grindhouse]
- Joe Simpson crashed Nick Lachey's Super Bowl party. Number of times he was asked what's it like to cup Jessica's breasts: 1,846. (Margin of error +/- 3.) [The Blemish]
- Bradley Cooper is probably going to do Reese Witherspoon. [PopSugar]
- Kanye West throws a hissy fit over people writing about him having a hissy fit. [Bossip]
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Scope Out (12) Pics of Lorraine Nicholson After the Jump
Continue Reading "Lorraine Nicholson still wearing bikinis and other news"
Rihanna wears crazy shit
Here's Rihanna performing at the Pepsi Super Bowl Fan Jam in Miami last night and she has to be feeling pretty awesome considering this time last year she was recovering from a car door to the face. Also, I can see a whole lot of her right left tit which everyone knows is the antidote for depression. Not the fact that it's out there, mind you, but the simple fact that I'm looking at it. Trust me, there's been numerous clinical trials which my lawyer assures me will be knocked down to misdemeanor solicitation if they don't find the fifth hooker in my crawlspace.
Shit.
Scope Out (20) Pics of Rihanna After the Jump
Philadelphia, you're alright.
Snooki made an appearance at the Philadelphia Wing Bowl this morning where the fine citizens decided to boo loudly any time her Jamie-Lynn Sigler With The Gout face appeared on the Jumbo-tron. In response, Snooki flipped off the entire city during an interview with FOX Philly, so I can only assume vengeance will be handed out swiftly. (Read: Cut off the beast's food supply which consists solely of cheesesteaks and Italian penises.)
Simon Monjack: 'Brittany didn't seem that sick'
After the results of Brittany Murphy's autopsy report were released yesterday, the smartest move Simon Monjack could've made at that point is to disappear behind whatever large object could effectively shield him from view. Instead he's going to continue to dig himself into a hole by giving interviews to People:
Monjack said Thursday that Brittany didn't seem very sick on the day she died. She was "not that ill," he said. "She wasn't coughing up. I've had pneumonia and coughed up handfuls of spittle. So yeah, everything surprised us, everything."
Asked about the coroner's assertion that his wife's death could have been prevented if she'd just gone to the doctor sooner, Monjack said, "I don't know what he said so I don't want to comment on what I haven't seen."
For him, a chapter has ended. "Case closed," said Monjack. "As the coroner said, there's no foul play."
And Simon Monjack's right, there wasn't foul play. Just a general consensus that Brittany Murphy would've lived had she been taken to a hospital instead of kept at home out of fear of somebody discovering the prescription drugs she'd been illegally consuming to escape the fact she'll never be a singing penguin. What a glowing review of the situation, Con-man Walrus. "Hey, I didn't murder her. I just handled the situation like a moron because Mexican Xanax kept lamb chops in my belly. There's a difference."
Continue Reading "Simon Monjack: 'Brittany didn't seem that sick'"
