In case two bikini galleries and Kim Kardashian‘s breasts aren’t enough to make up for one George Zimmerman post, here’s Tati Neves the hooker/porn star who filmed Justin Bieber sleeping posing for a new set of bikini photos because the Internet is magic. And if you’re thinking to yourself, “Why would I want to look into a large Brazilian ass Justin Bieber had sex with?” You seriously don’t believe that happened, do you? She said he was good at it. That should’ve been your first clue.
The only reason Kanye West is even with Kim Kardashian is because he’s obsessed with her sex tape. And now he’s made his own version, only disguised as a music video so he can force people to watch it on daytime television. Which seems baller except you know who else buys porn stars? Justin Bieber. *drops mic*
Kanye West ‘Bound 2′ Video After The Jump
You flippered sons of bitches. Don’t think I forgot…
Brittany Murphy died almost four years ago on December 20, 2009 at age 32. Not even five months later, her shady as shit husband Simon Monjack died of the exact same symptoms and everyone just assumed the killer was dead now and justice had been served. Case closed. Except apparently Brittany’s dad has been trying to prove she was murdered, and a new lab report now claims several elements found in rat poison were in her system. The Examiner reports:
Ten (10) of the heavy metals evaluated were detected at levels higher that the WHO [The World Health Organization] high levels. Testing the hair strand sample identified as” back of the head” we have detected ten (10) heavy metals at levels above the WHO high levels recommendation. If we were to eliminate the possibility of a simultaneous accidental heavy metals exposure to the sample donor then the only logical explanation would be an exposure to these metals (toxins) administered by a third party perpetrator with likely criminal intent.
Before I go any further, Brittany Murphy’s mom Sharon got everything and was the only person constantly around Simon and Brittany. Granted, Simon was a con artist who was more than likely working Brittany’s mom, he ended up being the one getting worked when he suddenly died of the exact same pneumonia-like symptoms. It’s pretty fucking clear, so I assume that’s where Brittany’s dad is going with this except, just kidding, the government did it. The government killed Brittany Murphy. Via Hollywood Life: More »
- Katie Holmes brings Suri out of the country to her movie sets. SHOTS FIRED. [Lainey Gossip]
- Taylor Swift and Harry Styles might be getting back together. [Dlisted]
- Homosexuality is unnatural, but this is totally cool, Russia? That how it is? [theCHIVE]
- Wait, when was Lady GaGa bearable? [Fishwrapper]
- Meet The Ugliest American [The Daily Banter]
- Alyssa Milano swimsuit photos, anyone? [tooFab]
- And now Rob Ford doing Van Damme‘s Epic Split. Oh, Internet. [BuzzFeed]
- Olivia Wilde has a baby.. bump? That’s not right. [Popoholic]
- Jewel fixed her tits. [Hollywood Tuna]
- Candice Swanepoel and some other chick are topless. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]
- “Robert Downey Jr. was only interesting after sucking 200 dicks for crack.” [FilmDrunk]
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Photos: Splash News
Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed with Gerard Butler as our lead-off, because he posed with attractive women and this is the Internet, so we now all assume said women enjoy sex in temporary pooping structures. There’s a formula here, people. We’ve also got the freakishly youthful Kimmy Gibbler, as well as Brooke Mueller innocently playing with her children and not in reality trying to fight off the alien spiders that keep smoking her meth. Then finally – and I honestly can’t believe it’s taken this long – Toronto mayor Rob Ford makes his first appearance in this shameful collection of pop culture diarrhea.
I don’t know whether I love this guy or if I should ask him to adopt me. Discuss,
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
For some reason, Courtney Stodden was invited To The Badge & Eagle Gala to support the LAPD which should really concern the man who married her while she was only 16. In fact, I’d make sure she’s not holding a copy of The Green Mile and/or talking to a sketch artist in any of these pics. I’d do it myself, but I don’t fuck children, so I’ll probably just eat a sandwich then not go to jail. You see how my hands are tied here.
Photos: Pacific Coast News