Jessica Alba Bikini Photos Don’t Wait Until Morning And Other News

July 13th, 2014 // 23 Comments

- Rachel McAdams and Jake Gyllenhaal drank at my old college bar. Their pee burns now. [Lainey Gossip]

- Forever 21 once fired Chrissy Teigen for being too fat. It’s what Jesus would do. [Dlisted]

- There Are Sexy Chivers Among Us [theCHIVE]

- Mila Kunis is about to drop a douche-baby any second now. [Fishwrapper]

- Veronica Chaos having sex with a ventriloquist’s dummy is why there’s an Internet. [WWTDD]

- Does “toast” mean “destroyer of server space thanks to Brazilian fat injections?” [The Frisky]

- Goddamn, Nicole Scherzinger… [Popoholic]

- Chris Brown and Drake‘s love finally cut out the middle-Rihanna. [Starpulse]

- “Channing Tatum shaved his head OMGs!” – Your noonerhole [tooFab]

- Jessica Simpson was hungover at her wedding. Of course. [IDLYITW]

- Xenia Deli in lingerie. [Hollywood Tuna]

- The Sexiest Social Media Pics of The Week [Celebslam]

- Karolina Kurkova is topless. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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Photos: FameFlynet, Splash News

The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 4.18

July 12th, 2014 // 62 Comments

Welcome to a mammoth-sized installment of The Most Important People on The Internet which combines the best of this week and last for an experience that lasts way longer than me in the sack, so there’s a chance it might even give a woman an orgasm if the female orgasm was real and not something I keep buying treasure maps to find while repeatedly forgetting cartographers don’t work in crayon. Or finger paints. But enough about the past 20 years of my life, you kids have fun.

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The Crap We Missed – Friday 7.11.14

July 11th, 2014 // 405 Comments

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed which starts off with triple semi-nude butts and only improves from there. We’ve got a Paris Hilton panty (possibly vagina) flash, Peter Dinklage wearing a do rag, Jeremy Renner in the backseat of a car with a dude, as well as a barrage of side boob, more butt and a possible father daughter incestuous scenario. It’s almost a perfect collection, almost…

*Googles Prince+Charles+Richard+Grieco+Civil+Union, hovers over RETURN key, closes eyes, crosses fingers*

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

Kim Kardashian’s Marriage Is Already Falling Apart

July 11th, 2014 // 47 Comments
Yo Stop Raping Me!
Kanye West
Kanye Pulled A Kristen Stewart (No Vagina Licking) Read More »

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West have only been married 46 days and already he hates being in the same room with her. In fact, they’ve only spent nine days together since their honeymoon where shit immediately began falling apart. Radar reports:

“Kim complained and sulked the entire time they were in Ireland on their honeymoon,” an insider revealed. “She didn’t like the cooler damp climate, and the lack of high-end designer stores. Kanye tried to arrange tours of local museums, but she wanted nothing to do with it. Only Kim would go to Ireland and be bored, and go to two separate movies in the same day in a foreign country!”

Eventually they bailed on Ireland after Kim talked Kanye into taking her to Joe Francis‘ mansion in Mexico where she spent their now second honeymoon posing for wet T-shirt pics to sell to very same people who rape her husband, so really it’s a miracle these two aren’t destined for a lifetime together: More »

Aubrey O’Day Is A Talented Performer

July 11th, 2014 // 24 Comments

Wait. Talented means having really large breasts that overshadow crazy eyes, an almost stunning lack of agility in a situation that routinely requires it, and basically everything else on a person’s entire body? Because I feel like I’m using that right. There’s just something in my gut. Or Aubrey O’Day‘s, whatever. I’m not a doctor.

Photos: Pacific Coast News

Is Your Girlfriend On ‘Glee?’ You’re Going To Die

July 11th, 2014 // 8 Comments
Becca Tobin Boyfriend Matt Bendik

Public safety > decorum. Sorry, folks, I have a responsibility. *goes back to searching for more butt-pee*

‘Glee’ Star Becca Tobin Boyfriend Found Dead in Philly Hotel – TMZ

Photo: Instagram

Selena Gomez Has No Idea What Her Nipples Are Doing Now

July 11th, 2014 // 28 Comments

When Courtney Stodden got cartoonishly bigger implants last year, she went through a short adjustment period where her old clothes didn’t exactly fit the same because physics. And now here’s recently retitted Selena Gomez not realizing she posted her own nipple slip to Instagram because her life’s following the same exact path as Courtney Stodden’s and, oh God, I just killed her, didn’t I? I fucking killed her. I’m sorry!

Jesus Christ, Kelly Brook, And Other News

July 10th, 2014 // 27 Comments

- Robin Thicke‘s new album is not doing well. [Lainey Gossip]

- Farrah Abraham‘s backdoor yogurt restaurant website got hacked. [Dlisted]

- A Bikini A Day Keeps The Doctor Away [theCHIVE]

- Khloe Kardashian knows how to pick ‘em. [Fishwrapper]

- The iPhone 6‘s new screen can survive a stabbing, so good news, serial killers! [The Frisky]

- Goddamn, Hailey Clauson bikini photos. [Popoholic]

- I actually agree with Stacey Dash for once. [Starpulse]

- Candace Cameron in a bikini? I don’t think Jesus is gonna like this. [tooFab]

- Mel Gibson wants to help Shia LaBeouf now. [IDLYITW]

- What the hell happened to Sophie Monk? [Hollywood Tuna]

- Wonkboobs does Me In My Place. [Celebslam]

- I think Cara Delevingne‘s eyebrows are hot. There, I said it. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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Photos: RAAK/AKM-GSI