OSCARS: Justin Timberlake Didn’t Bring Jessica Biel. This is Why.

February 27th, 2011 // 63 Comments

Adding fuel to the rumors that Justin Timberlake‘s penis accepted Mila Kunis‘ friend request (Don’t ever let me do that again.), he conveniently showed up to the Oscars sans Jessica Biel only to turn around and present an award with 95% of Mila’s breasts. Again, this could all be circumstantial evidence thanks to their new movie coming out, but it’s getting a little too suspicious. Next we’re going to find out “really good friends” knock each other up all the time and then marry each other for the tax credits. Doesn’t mean Jessica Biel’s a lesbian. Ha! Did her girlfriend tell you that? She’s a character.

Photos: Getty

superficial

  1. Mila Kunis Oscars
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Guilty.

  2. Mila Kunis Oscars
    Kraki
    Commented on this photo:

    geeze, she is ridiculously hot.

  3. Turd Ferguson

    STUNNING.
    She always looks hot.

  4. That Bastard Tony

    Still trying to figure out if this is an upgrade or downgrade. Granted, Milla is the hotter of the two, Jessica seems a little less high-maintenance. Sometimes you have to look beyond breasts and ask yourself if she is worth the potential trouble. Just sayin’.

    …and oh yeah. FIRST!

    • Girl who knows ALL

      Biel has much bigger boobs. I’d say sometimes you have to look past a manface…

      Most men want a hot looking woman who acts like a man (in other words most men are a little gay) and Biel fits the man-girl bill to a T… and A, but Mila Kunis is well Mila Kunis so what’s a boy band douche who tricked America into thinking he has actual talent to do? Exactly what he is doing; stalling so he can have both.

      • Deacon Jones

        I’d take Jessica in a heart beat.

        She probably fucks like a mule.

      • Mila Kunis

        Hmmm yes she does seem like the better lay. Mila looks like she’d get tired easily and would do the whole you’re on my hair thing.

        I guess that assclown has something figured out. Be seen with Mila go home to Biel. Still can we as the public find a way to vote Justin off the Island? Oh wait I forgot most of my fellow females have no taste and actually like him. Thanks so much ladies and while I’m at it thanks for Bieber, Ashton, and Robert Pattinson.

      • horn dog

        @Girl – I think you nailed it.

      • Girl who knows ALL

        Thanks horn dog!

      • dude have you ever noticed how Jessica Biel kinda has a horse face??? well i have (she used to be cute about 6 years ago), and maybe she can get past it sometimes with a bit of makeup, but it’s still there. it’s still there.

  5. That Bastard Tony

    Damn you Matt and Turd. Making me call out first and becoming a liar.

  6. spasmolytic46

    OMFG! she has armpit hair look in pic 3

  7. Hmm....

    Still dont get it with this one , I mean ok , but not amazingly gorgeous ( personal opinion btw for all the Mila minoins waiting to start bitching and/or questioning my eyesight , I.Q or sexual preference )

    • IttyBittyTittyCommittee

      I just got bitch slapped for calling Jennifer Lawrence ugly and looking like a 44 year old.
      The insults are coming.
      Be Brave.

    • Turd Ferguson

      Ehh, to each his own. That’s why there are a few million for us to chose from :)

      Something about Mila does it for me – some goofy combination of exotic, goofy, beautiful and a cool personality (as far as I can tell, not like she returns my calls…)

      • IttyBittyTittyCommittee

        When she smiles it’s righteous, when she vamps it up it’s harsh.
        I’d still attempt to insert my semi-flaccid member in any or all of her orifices.
        monja

    • obregon

      I support this.

    • Franksinatrastein

      Me too. I wish her well but if it were her or Jessica Biehl, and Jessica Biehl shaved her head, and Jessica Biehl had just run 10 miles through jungle heat… I’d still choose Jessica Biehl.

      I’d need a lot of Tequila before Mila would look half as good.

  8. Mila Kunis Oscars
    lauryn
    Commented on this photo:

    that dress is GORGEOUS

  9. me

    yep, his favourite part is still fooling american women………..

  10. IttyBittyTittyCommittee

    Fish,
    She’s getting boned by Super Bowl MVP Aaron Rodgers

  11. Mila Kunis Oscars
    Suze
    Commented on this photo:

    She is gorgeous but why oh why does nobody ever bring up her VERY OBVIOUS nose job? There is a reason she is 10x’s hotter than she was on that 70′s show, it’s called nose job. Everybody went ape shit over Megan Fox’s nose work and don’t say a peep about Mila’s, who’s work is just as obvious if you bother to take a peek at her older stuff,

  12. Mr Obvious

    Damn, she’s hot. I think I can almost see some nipples.

  13. c

    bit of a lazy eye, but the girl is gorgeous.

  14. DrunkRussian

    My God she’s hot.

  15. alexandra

    i. want. that. dress.

    • ughhh

      right?! the lace on the boobs is the cutest detail

      • MrsEllis

        Yea, but it’s only cute when the boobs are nice and small. If a girl with a bigger chest tried to wear that, she’d look like a whore. Do I sound bitter? Yea, maybe I’m sick of my boobs right about now. It’s not fair…..

      • That Bastard Tony

        Don’t be sick of your boobs… ever. Embrace your boobs everyday. Tell them they are good boobs. Positive re-enforcement is critical to development and growth.

        Hope that didn’t sound too creepy.

      • vitobonespur

        HEY EVERYBODY…let’s hear it for MrsEllis’s boobs! Maybe we can get her to post a pic.

        *HUZZAH * HOORAY * YIPPEE…

  16. MrsEllis

    She looks a whole lot less hot after watching that awkward award presentation with Justin Timberlake. Seeing her just makes me cringe now.

    At what point did Hollywood lose all of its wit and charm?

    And her voice is really annoying. I should be on her side. She’s my race. But she really isn’t faking anything when she’s playing Jackie. That’s all her…

  17. Mila Kunis Oscars
    Average Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    i wanna see her and emma stone in a movie together

  18. Snickers

    What is so attractive about this chick? What the hell is up with her eye?

    • Deacon Jones

      Speaking of eyes, anyone else notice that black chick’s eye in the SI swimsuit issue this month. That things all fucked up!

  19. Hambone

    I seriously hope there’s some credence to the “Biel is a lesbian” rumors. My life would he complete. As well as my orgasm. (please let there be a sex tape).

  20. Name

    hey i don’t get it, she looks retarded so wtf?

  21. either way Timberlake is screwed.

  22. Mila Kunis Oscars
    horn dog
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m surprised she didn’t grab his head and shove his face in her cleavage a la’ Elaine in “The Nip”

  23. Katie

    Just an FYI…Jessica did meet up with Justin at the Vanity Fair party right after the Oscars, and she looked smokin’.

  24. Mila Kunis Oscars
    smd
    Commented on this photo:

    no one has said anything cuz she never got a nose job. I’m looking at her old stuff now and it looks the same. She looks better now cuz she’s older and has better make up artists. I do make up for a living and there’s A LOT you can do with a little highlighting and contouring.

  25. anonymoose

    never understood why any woman would be interested in the timberlake. he has no sex appeal whatsoever.

  26. In the famous words of Ralph Kramden…

    “Homina, homina, homina… *splorch*”

    Actually, I added that last part. Anyone have a kleenex or old t-shirt?

  27. Mila Kunis Oscars
    fingerling
    Commented on this photo:

    uffph, kinda feo

  28. Mila Kunis Oscars
    barkerman
    Commented on this photo:

    Justin: “So, umm… Something about… Umm… I was. Tit.”

    Fuck. I just misbehaved. Let’s get to the whippin!!

  29. carly

    Obviously you don’t know what your talking about since Jessica was with Justin at the Vanity Fair afterparty and they looked hot together. Justin hasn’t brought a girlfriend to an awards show since Britney. After her he’s kept his personal life private.

  30. Mila Kunis Oscars
    bad eyes
    Commented on this photo:

    ppl look at Mila Kunis she is looking incredibly hot and ultimately sexy!!!!
    I wish I was justin Timberlake,,,,,

  31. Alex

    I still have trouble believing Justin Timberlake is straight. I think one day he will reveal that all of these relationships were set up for publicity.

  32. Mila Kunis Oscars
    Paloma
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t blame him. This chick is waaaaaaaaay hotter that Jessica!

  33. Mila Kunis Oscars
    Phil
    Commented on this photo:

    Would somebody PLEASE buy this girl some tits?

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