OSCARS: Jennifer Lawrence and a List of People Who Don’t Look as Hot

February 27th, 2011 // 76 Comments

Here’s Best Actress nominee Jennifer Lawrence (Winter’s Bone) arriving at the 83rd Annual Academy Awards looking just hot as shit, so let’s just say she won and save ourselves the mind-numbing three hours of watching. In the meantime, here’s a list of people who aren’t getting their own gallery so I don’t know why they bothered to show up. For the drugs maybe? Because I could’ve sworn Charlie Sheen ate them all.

Wait. They don’t know, do they? Oh… my… God…

Annette Bening – The Kids Are Alright
Nicole Kidman – Rabbit Hole
Jennifer Lawrence – Winter’s Bone
WINNER: Natalie Portman – Black Swan
Michelle Williams – Blue Valentine

Javier Bardem – Biutiful
Jeff Bridges – True Grit
Jesse Eisenberg – The Social Network
WINNER: Colin Firth – The King’s Speech
James Franco – 127 Hours

Amy Adams – The Fighter
Helena Bonham Carter – The King’s Speech
WINNER: Melissa Leo – The Fighter
Hailee Steinfeld – True Grit
Jacki Weaver – Animal Kingdom

WINNER: Christian Bale – The Fighter
John Hawkes – Winter’s Bone
Jeremy Renner – The Town
Mark Ruffalo – The Kids Are All Right
Geoffrey Rush – The King’s Speech

Darren Aronofsky – Black Swan
David O. Russell – The Fighter
WINNER: Tom Hooper – The King’s Speech
David Fincher – The Social Network
Ethan & Joel Coen – True Grit

Black Swan
The Fighter
The Kids Are All Right

WINNER: The King’s Speech
127 Hours
The Social Network
Toy Story 3
True Grit
Winter’s Bone

Photos: Getty


  1. Cock Dr

    She has a constellation of moles on her chest.
    Tell me who else wins cuz I ain’t watching.

  2. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like a grown-up version of Hayden Panettiere.

  3. DKNY

    I’d give her a Winter’s Bone (see what I did there?)

  4. RickDogg

    Jennifer Lawrence just gave me a Winter’s Boner

  5. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    She kind of looks like Miss Piggy.

  6. IttyBittyTittyCommittee

    Okay, I’ll make it a trifecta.
    Jennifer gave me a Winter’s Bone.
    To tell the truth, I think she’s been beatin by the ugly stick.

  7. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    who cares?
    Commented on this photo:

    if i told you my penis looks like a bald little man dipped in gold would you sit on my face while i read my speech?

  8. brilliant

    This is the Oscars girl. Try dressing up a bit.

    • vitobonespur

      The dress looks smokin’. She just needed to wear a diamond choker or maybe some pearls. Or maybe a ruby pendant.

      Accessorize, People, accessorize! Work with me…

  9. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    eh, mila looked better.

  10. me

    psssssst: SHE JUST THOUGHT IT WAS A SWIM PARTY, folks!!

  11. Holly

    I knew it. The only actress (unknown, mind you) dressed as a porn star and you’re immediately all over it. Classy and perhaps -cough- smart-looking doesn’t do it for you, eh? I think this blog may be a bit beneath me (and quite a few other readers judging by many other sensible comments.)

    Hey, guess what… can we see your picture?! :D Huh? How about it, Superficial Guy? Let’s be superficial right back! Who wants to bet you’ve got glasses, a beer belly, and no chance of getting laid? Come on… for shits and giggles.

    • Holly

      Just so we can see the humor in someone like you finding only these “perfect” girls meeting your standards.

    • TomFrank

      Glasses make someone ugly? Goddamn…

    • Lola

      have you ever even read superfishe’s comments on his posts? you wouldn’t get his wit even if a donkey fucked you with it in the face. so shut up, you’re probably a fat ugly bitch yourself.

      • Holly

        You’d like to think that Lola, actually I’m 5’8, 125lbs and have a model contract in the works right now. Sorry!

    • Holly

      Knippy – I read the site because a lot of stuff IS witty, and I do love how he pokes fun at celebs who naturally make jackasses out of themselves. Been reading it regularly for several years. But only swooning over women who dress inappropriately is just plain stupid.

      • spork

        Damn – we just got pissed on by model Holly from high atop her ivory tower!
        No one cares what models have to say, honey. Get used to it.

      • spork

        P.S. just read your stats again…eat a sandwich!!! lol

      • Holly

        Spork – haha actually 125 for my body type isn’t very skinny at all, I’ve been told I would need to lose more weight in order to do anything even relatively mainstream, but I’ve denied because I dont want to sacrifice my health
        Certainly wasn’t meaning to “piss on you,” just vented because when I see posts like this (girls like this getting all the attention) it makes me mad.

  12. strit

    born in 1990 wtfffffff

  13. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:


  14. It’s like a less hott version of Scarlett Johansson’s in her boobtastic red dress.

  15. I didn’t know Baywatch had a line of evening gowns.

    • Jennifer

      That’s what I was thinking! I can’t stand chics who think, ‘I’m so hot, I don’t have to go to much effort at all’…. WRONG. Boring bitch.

      • fred

        its either that theory or some1 who doesnt think that they need to hide behind the glitter of fake diamonds. i personally dont think that all the glitter is needed and thats why im dating the modest but pretty girl instead of the over the top girl with so much mascara and other stuff that i cant even see what im trying to look at (for all u ppl out there who dont know what im talking about, i mean the actual person :P). i admit that a little make up is nice and maybe a necklace or something would have been nice but honestly i dont mind it if some1 is beautiful and knows it which causes them to put on less accessories then others who need them.

  16. alexandra

    she looks oooold! only one year younger than me? she looks to be about 5 years older.

  17. Shimone

    This girl is one of the most stunning people I’ve ever seen. All the premature hate on this thread is fearful and jealous. She was probably the most outstanding feature of this year’s Oscars.

  18. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    damn. maybe looking a leeeetle casual for the oscars but, girls body is SICK!!

  19. MrsEllis

    I love how people don’t know whether they should be calling her hot or not because the press hasn’t come out and told them what to think of her yet.

  20. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Ill Rough you just the way you are
    Commented on this photo:

    Delroy Lindo s missing a whole set of view…

  21. Ill Rough you just the way you are

    Hmm I love me some fresh face. That’s hot property…

  22. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Average Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    The dress looks like a swimsuit from the top, not Oscar worthy

  23. Professor Hobo MD

    Whoever did her make up deserves an oscar.

  24. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    You really should wear something a little more elaborate than a lined tank dress to the Academy Awards. She’s very pretty, but *yawn*

  25. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    She has the fingers of a butcher.

  26. Mila Kunis


    However since this is the superficial here are my complaints:

    -Shitty dress/ bad color
    -her face looks way to much Like Renee Zelleweger’s
    -Looks old as hell for 20 and Zellewegger faces age horribly so it’s downhill from here
    -small eyes
    -rally bad legs, google it that’s why she covers them all the time now

  27. The King

    S-s-s-s-sh-sh-sh-she’s p-p-p-p-pretty hot.

  28. hapa

    dam this girl was hot the hole night to calm for me though. needs mroe energy

  29. Aidankunis

    It ain´t even Winter and I already got a bone in my pants…she´s freaking hot!!

  30. Bilvis

    Looks like she’s on Baywatch in that pic.

  31. Snarky_Pup

    Gorgeous girl!

  32. Arzach

    Insert joke with “winter” and “bone” in it here (that was an easy one)

  33. voodoo

    in main photo she looks a like a babe on baywatch.

  34. Anya

    Pretty girl, looks like a mixture between Anna Kournikova and Candice Swanpoel, but I thought she was around 25, certainly not born in 1990. Sadly, her other pictures are no where near as hot as this set.

  35. am I considered a perv if I couldn’t help but notice that in a couple of her pics she is exposing a very erotic view of her right armpit?

  36. petcov

    didnt know who she was until i saw her in that red dress lol hooootttteeeessss girl at the oscar

  37. shoegal

    Why is she wearing the Baywatch swimsuit?

  38. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    slappy magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    This is a word I never use, not sarcastically, not ironically, not to describe actual food I’m actually eating. But Jennifer Lawrence may just be the very definition of “Yummy.”

  39. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s younger than Hayden Panettiere….

  40. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    Keep your chin up. I have a creative way we can play connect the dots.

  41. Lisa

    She looks EXACTLY like Stephanie Pratt.

  42. Drundel

    Would wreck that.

  43. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    Fantastic beat ! I wish to apprentice at the same time as you amend your website, how can i subscribe for a weblog website? The account aided me a appropriate deal. I have been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered shiny clear idea

  44. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like Candace Cameron in the 80s. piggy face.

  45. Jennifer Lawrence Oscars
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she looks like a pig.

  46. saving my boner for summer

    Ugly, overrated, stupid whore. How many times can someone say they want to bang the same recycled boring blonde white chick without realizing it?

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