Oscar Pistorius may have surprised Reeva Steenkamp on Valentine’s by shooting her to death after allegedly beating her in the head with a cricket bat, but that doesn’t mean he’s not a sensitive man who wants to pay homage to her soul in his uncle’s house where he’s staying out on bail. “I couldn’t find her grave and piss in it,” he’d later tell close friends and family members. “This seemed like the next best thing.” TMZ reports:
Oscar’s rep released a statement, saying, “Oscar specifically requested the memorial service as he continues to grieve and remains in deep mourning for the loss of his partner Reeva.”
The rep adds, “Since it is such a sensitive issue, Oscar has asked for a private service with people who share his loss, including his family members who knew and loved Reeva as one of their own.”
“Call her ‘your partner.’ Hold memorial at uncle’s house. Don’t invite anyone who’ll ask questions. Good, good. This is good.” – Chris Brown taking notes
Photos: Getty
And next, he’ll publicly announce his tireless efforts to find the real killer. Oh, wait. Different story…
It wasn’t him! It was the 2-legged man!
His defense doesn’t have a fucking leg to stand on. hardy har har.
that one was said ten minutes after he was arrested.. a little slow aren’t we?
And here I thought I was so fucking clever and that nobody noticed he didn’t have legs. That’s why it’s sooo classic. He doesn’t have actual legs and his defense doesn’t have legs. Get it?
Wait, his defense attorneys have those blade things, too? Wow! What are the odds?
You can see his temper when he loses a race.
I’d be pretty pissy if I lost foot race to a Down’s kid.
Its even worse when he loses a tap dance contest.
All you folks who have already decided he’s guilty, just keep in mind that every day a homeowner is murdered by criminals who have hidden in their bathroom at night. Every responsible homeowner should bring a loaded gun and empty it through the bathroom door every time they get up in the middle of the night to piss. If you don’t you’re just setting yourself up to be the next victim of a bathroom burglar!
Turd burglar??
I just eat a few burritos and then don’t flush after my good-night dump. Four deaths and two insane so far.
Someone hid in my bathroom one night. Turned out to be James Garner trying to confirm that I was really a man.
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen every episode of ‘The Rockford Files’, and I just don’t get that reference. And isn’t James Garner dead?
This situation is fucked up beyond all measure.
F.U.B.A.M. An interesting variation….
The White OJ!
Of course he shot her, its not like he could kick her to death. No doubt the service will include a 21-gun salute . . . towards a closed door. Anyway, we all know what Pistorius will say as they head towards the limousine after the service: “I call shotgun”.
Classic! Well played. +100
:”Of course he shot her, its not like he could kick her to death…”
I can’t fucking stop laughing.
he’s going for the sympathy defense. he may not get out of jail but he’s hoping for a lighter sentence. even though he killed her out of pure anger, he is trying to act like a man who is in pain over her death and sobbing like a little bitch in court and now this. what an asshole.
He’s just afraid of what’s going to happen to him in prison. Even standing up, he’s eye level to every cock in the joint.
Of course he’s innocent.
If I had accidentally shot my girlfriend, I too would have called my brother and lawyer, waited for them to arrive at the house, and THEN called the police/paramedics.
Are you by chance a Kennedy?
He does get creative points for using assault rifles for legs, ala, Rose McGowan in Planet Terror.
This is what happens when you have to tell her twice.
This fucking asshole has some big brass balls. Piece of shit murderer. How the fuck is he out on bail, is Chris Brown’s judge moonlighting in South Africa?
He’s like the kid who slaughters his parents, then throws himself on the mercy of the court claiming he’s an orphan.
^^The textbook definition of chutzpah.
This is discrimination against the disabled! He can’t even be a privileged athlete girlfriend murderer now? Po’ lil tink-tink…
Why doesn’t he just fucking dig her up, stuff her, and mount her over his fireplace. That’s right, her family cremated her and took away his prize. He’s probably thinking, what a waste of good buck shot.
We need a gun in every home.
So we can shoot down our girfriends in a murderous rage on Valentine’s Day.
Message from the NRA.
Hey. Flowers and candy are expensive.
He is a fucking asshole how can anyone do that to a girlfriend on valentine’s day?
She was probably nagging at him for leaving his socks laying around.
He layed those down years ago.
so you’re saying it was justifiable homicide then?
I think they misspelled his last name. It should be “Pist-off-ius.”
this is south africa, where the lead investigator is up on multiple murder charges (him and his police mates got drunk and shot up a minivan). south africa is the one place this may be legit!