In case you haven’t heard by now, Halle Berry‘s fiance Olivier Martinez beat the living shit out of her ex Gabriel Aubry‘s face after the two got into a fight on Thanksgiving morning when Gabriel dropped off Nahla, so right off the bat you know Halle made this all happen by standing on a balcony above waving her naked boobs around. It’s got her nipple-prints all over it. TMZ reports:
Law enforcement sources tell TMZ … Gabriel showed up to Halle’s house with Nahla for a custodial hand-off. We’re told Gabriel was still in the motor court (a rich person’s word for a giant driveway) when Olivier walked up to him and said, “We have to move on.”
According to witnesses, Gabriel then pushed Olivier and threw a punch at his face, but Olivier blocked it and the punch struck him in the shoulder instead. We’re told Gabriel then pushed Olivier to the ground, and Olivier cold-cocked him in the face, and a struggle ensued, ending with Olivier pinning Gabriel to the ground.
And my favorite part:
And finally, there’s this … specifics about the argument between Gabriel and Olivier are sketchy because they were trash talking each other in French.
“Gabriel, you are what our people call ‘les incompetents.’”
“Les poissons!” *brandishes croissant*
Of course, Gabriel couldn’t have given Halle a better holiday gift because now she has a legitimate reason to go to court and get a restraining order against him:
Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ Halle and her lawyers are alarmed that Gabriel allegedly started the fight with Olivier Martinez right in front of 4-year-old Nahla. Although a judge issued an emergency order of protection — requiring Gabriel to stay 100 yards away from Halle, Nahla and Olivier — that order expires Tuesday.
We’re told Halle’s lawyers will be in family court asking a judge to extend that protection for an indefinite period of time.
More importantly, Halle Berry has awesome breasts as evidenced by the bikini photos below which honestly was the whole point of this post. Except for making Gabriel Aubry talk like the chef from The Little Mermaid because, holy shit, have I been sitting on that one. Bless you, Baguette Jesus.
Photos: AKM-GSI, Splash News