Olivia Wilde Is Your New Pregnancy Rumor

January 25th, 2012 // 18 Comments

“Excuse me for a second- ‘The fuck did you just say?”

Apparently there’s a rumor going around that Olivia Wilde is pregnant, and this may come as a shock to you, but I’m not buying this one. Mostly because Reese Witherspoon is and everyone knows pregnancy is a zero-sum game. But science aside, if Olivia is somehow pregnant, that would make Jason Sudeikis the father and I don’t know how that doesn’t prove he also knocked up January Jones. Clearly the man’s running around Hollywood with an extra-virile cock while continuing to find work in shitty comedy after shitty comedy. He’s like a Child Support Fairy, so that solves that mystery. Ha! For a minute there, I actually thought women were serious when they say they just want someone who makes them laugh. I’ll go curl up in a ball of loneliness now.

Photos: INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Well, it would explain the sudden breast growth from “mostly absent” to “somewhat noticeable.”

  2. Morgan

    NOooooOooooOOoooo this is terrible “news”. It would be gamechanger for me personally if it turned out to be true.

  3. dude!

    Slow news day, eh, Fish?

  4. whocares

    Uhh it doesn’t even look like she ate a cheeseburger for lunch… I don’t get it…

  5. Idra

    No, she’s just fat, look at her arms and butt, too.

  6. It looks like she’s standing in front of the free clinic. Maybe she went in and they used the coat hanger.

  7. catapostrophe

    People with short arms give me the willies.

  8. Blah blah shirts blah weird angles blah blah blah.

  9. Black Swan

    What is she at 4 months?

  10. I think the Child Support Fairy is trapped in Antonio Cromartie’s house.

  11. Rico Jones

    I would eat her prego ass.

  12. whip

    this is the way this failed actress attracts the limelights…………
    (sick but true)

  13. Jeanny

    Eh feck off all of you, she looks about as pregnant as a yearling colt. If you look at pictures of her over the years you can tell her weight fluctuates a lot. She’s always had a stockier lower-body (thicker calves, toned thighs) and to compensate for that she’s sometimes been scarily thin, esp in the upper body. She lost a lot of weight for Tron which she gradually gained back afterward however 2011 hit her hard because of her divorce. She admitted to switching from a vegan diet back to a vegetarian diet because she was craving dairy (cheese) and she’s been gaining weight ever since. If it were pregnancy to blame the weight gain on, she’d be on the verge of giving birth.

    Also you’re all morons if you think a woman like that would throw away a rapidly growing career for that and with a man she’s been with for less than two months. She was /married/ for 8 years with a medium-profile career and she never pulled a stunt like that for attention. Additionally I’d reckon she’d be the type to announce it if she were.

    • As a straight father of two who can tell “pregnant” from “not starved”, I need to thank you for explaining all of the above and saving me the trouble of all the ensuing “FAG!” accusations from all the bunch round here.

      I wholeheartedly agree – what we’re seeing here is a thin woman with marginally heftier thighs. I likes. And if that’s pregnant, my love handles are biceps.

    • Frank Burns

      “yearling colt” . . . “reckon” . . . this is the most home-spun response I’ve ever read at this site. If only you’d been able to slip in “a passel of vittles” when discussing her eating habits!

  14. AnnaDraconida

    She looks great, IMO; cute & down-to-earth, as usual. I love that she dresses like a normal person.

  15. jay

    No, she’s not pregnant, she’s merely a healthy young woman. And totally bangable, IMO.

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