OJ Simpson still alive, juicing people

oj-juiced.jpgAnd the winner for most pathetic human being of the week goes to OJ Simpson for releasing a hidden-camera prank DVD called Juiced in which he pretends to sell his getaway car, the white Ford Bronco, and engages in some other inhumanly stupid “pranks.” In the Ford Bronco bit, he’s selling the vehicle at a used car lot and tells the buyer:

“It was good for me – it helped me get away. It’s a car that I personally made famous. The car has escapability, if you ever get into some trouble.” In other none-too-side-splitting stunts on the yet-to-be released DVD, the double-murder acquitee poses as a rapper, an elderly white man in a bingo game for senior citizens, a windshield-washer and a pizza delivery man. While cash-strapped Simpson is eager to hawk the DVD, it’s unclear whether any profits will go directly to the families of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, whom Simpson was ordered to pay $33.5 million after being found liable for their deaths in a civil suit. Goldman’s father, Fred, tells “Inside Edition” that any profits Simpson makes from “Juiced” will be “blood money.”

You know the difference between Punk’d and Juiced? Ashton Kutcher pranks celebrities with elaborate stunts whereas OJ Simpson pranks regular folks by joking about how he’s murders people. I don’t understand how him dressing up as a windshield washer or a pizza delivery guy is supposed to be funny. Does he rip off his costume at the end, stab them in the face and yell, “You’ve been Juiced!” Because I’m pretty sure he just stole that from a Mad TV skit from like 8 years ago.