Oh, Good, Snooki’s In A Bikini

July 31st, 2013 // 35 Comments

Here’s Snooki in Seaside Heights, New Jersey yesterday where she actually looked more like her normal self and less like whatever that shellacked thing was we posted the other day. It’s either because of the muffin top, or the fact that she’s probably surrounded by a sea of used condoms. I go back and forth.

Photos: Pacific Coast News

superficial

  1. vandal

    Is this fuckin’ mess black or white? I’m confused.

  2. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Three words, Snooki: cigarettes, coffee, and blueberries. Seriously, stain those f’ed up teef closer to the color of your leathery hide so they don’t call so much attention to themselves.

  3. BREAKING NEWS
    (AP) The State of New Jersey issued a contamination warning today at 1:15 PM EDT in the Seaside Heights area. When asked, Mike Litoris, Director of Public Safety for the State of New Jersey, would only say there was an “unknown toxic or biological spill near the shore” and crews were working to contain the area.

  4. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    Body language translation: “Look! He actually thinks he’s the father! Hahahaha!”

  5. Body shape reminds me of my 68 year old grandmother from Okmulgee,Oklahoma. ( Sorry Gram-Gram)

  6. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    The baby summed up our collective feelings

  7. RubberBandMan

    Fish needs to stop insulting bikinis. Fish, those are not bikinis, those are granny panties.

  8. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    This would make a nice New Jersey postcard.

    “Beach greetings from New Jersey! Land of syringes and used tampons!”

  9. anonymous

    All that hoopla over losing weight and working out and she’s still skinny-fat.

  10. rochard

    she’s like an uglier, browner, shorter, fatter, smellier, talentless version of taylor swift in a bikini

  11. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she’s the sullen lady who works at the DMV…the one who is about 50.

  12. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    With all the orange and black I thought maybe Oklahoma State had found themselves a new mascot.

  13. Laura

    She looks good but those bikini pants aren’t so flattering.

  14. i’m trying to eat lunch for fucks sake.

  15. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Look at all those used condoms, little one. If only your daddy would use them.”

  16. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “What’s wrong with mommy’s mouth?”

  17. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    Those teeth; I’m like a deer caught in the headlights of a Mack truck.

  18. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Look-dat! I woulda stepped right on dat needle! Fuckin’ hobos! Good ting da lil guy stepped on if fa daddy, dinjah buddy? Always lookin’ out for his eldahs an shit! Dats ma boy!”

  19. alex

    So 18 pics and not a single ass shot? I’m very disappointe….Bwahahahahahahaaaaa I can’t even type it.

    THANK YOU for not including an ass shot.

  20. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Pinktaco
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m thinking a little lower on the food chain.

  21. richie

    it’s a start, anyway.

  22. OMG those bikini bottoms are HIDEOUS!! Where do you even buy something like that?? She´d look ok if she werent wearing those things up to her armpits.

  23. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks as if she buys her bikinis from the same shop as Taylor Swift.

  24. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    Seaside frights at Seaside Heights.

  25. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    That “bikini” may as well be a bathing suit.There´s only like an inch of skin showing between the top and bottom.Are granny knickers a “thing” in America now?? Is it cool to wear your bottoms up to your armpits now?

  26. tom

    What have we done to endure this calamity?

  27. Slappy Magoo

    Those “Restore the Whore” funds are not monies well spent.

  28. Wow! Snooki looks pretty darn close to damn near someone I might, if drunk enough, consider fucking.

  29. Snooki Bikini Baby Lorenzo Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s official. Snooki and Taylor Swift buy their granny panties at the same store.

  30. …seriously, why are we still talking about this?

  31. kery

    maybe Taylor and Snooki like vintage bikinis and It looks good on her bu she must lose some weight and she`ll be ok.

  32. It's Her BF

    Whoever is telling her that she’s thin is an evil lying bastard

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