Oh, Boy, It’s Kim Kardashian’s Single

March 2nd, 2011 // 143 Comments

Kim Kardashian premiered her single “Jam” on KIIS FM with Ryan Seacrest this morning, and it’s pretty much everything you’d imagine it to be: An auto-tuned, emotionless pile of vapid unoriginality that somehow manages to capture how annoying this whole family is and transform it into sound. Seriously, she doesn’t even sing. She just says words in a monotone voice. I’ve heard more excitement from Khloe’s diet pill voiceovers and she was trapped in a room with no access to steak for an hour. Or legally dead if we’re arguing semantics.

Photos: Splash News, WENN

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  1. greyshrimp

    Some real fine gems of writing there (Angels in my eyezzz). And to top it all off, a nasal voice that even the best autotune can’t make any less annoying/clear. This should be a wake-up call for the whole music industry. No talent = no music career, so sorry. Of course, this will be the hit of the summer, right?

  2. this really is sad

    I’ve heard better singing from drunks durring last call on karaoke nite. Had to stop listening half way through it was so bad.

  3. lolabee

    When I couldn’t take it anymore and turned it off at the 1:12, I had an important existential epiphany: I deeply, truly love myself and that’s why I’ll never waste one more second listening to that steaming piece o’ shit.

  4. M

    UGh, this is pure shit. At least Paris Hilton had the decency of being only half bad.

  5. shirleytemple

    oh my fucking god, i want to die. why would you post this shit, fish????? WHY?
    when i read the comments i thought people were just being hateful, but i LITERALLY could not take an entire minute of this mind-numbling, ball-shrivelling garbage

  6. Aja

    what’s with music all sounding robotic these days?

  7. oermens

    A HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHBAHBAHAHAH AHA HABHABHAHBABHA HBABHABHABHABHABHABABHABHAHAH AHAH AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

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