Octomom vs. Kate Gosselin: Please tell me they make the kids fight.

June 2nd, 2009 // 42 Comments

In today’s “You’re Fucking Kidding Me” news, Octomom is attacking Kate Gosselin for exploiting her children for attention. The Octomom who just signed a reality show and book deal – and has the trademarked nickname Octomom. Yeah. RadarOnline reports:

“She needs to stop being so judgmental and stop pulling at straws for attention,” Suleman exclusively told RadarOnline.com. Suleman also accused Kate of being desperate for attention and over-emotional.
“My children are extremely healthy, strong and happy. Don’t you have, like, a lot of issues in your life? A lot of marital problems?” she asked of Gosselin.
“Why are you so desperate to glob on to my life? For attention?”

I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume Octomom has no sense of irony because she’s goddamn bananas, so let’s cut to the chase: I’ll give her a pair of Jimmy Choos for each of her children, and we can save everyone the inevitable SWAT team negotiations down the line. Seriously, let’s nip this thing in the bud before we see a grown woman duct-tape infants to her torso like some sort of make-shift body armor then dive through a window at Macy’s.


  1. Que

    Que cat fight.

  2. Que

    Que cat fight.

  3. Que

    Que double post! Y triple for this counting of this one!

  4. MissPants

    LMAO Octo is the one “globbing” on to Kates attention. The clip is from months ago and she is just now saying something about it once Kate is getting attention. Complete idiot. Both moms are crap & I feel sorry for their kids.

  5. justifiable

    Firdt off, Suleman, you numb cunt, it’s GLOM, not GLOB. And seeing as how a shitload of your kids are on disability and likely to be so for years to come, I’d lay off hitting the “healthy” button.

    Did anyone hear that her mom’s house was sold at foreclosure auction day before yesterday? Supposedly the same day she put down a deposit in about the same amount owed on a house for herself.

  6. Anon Y. Mous

    “USPTO filings” means trademark… not copyright.

  7. scrappydoo



  8. Tad Bit Tipsy

    Baby Cannons Face Off at Noon….. You ever been hit by a Toddler, it fucking hurts and is messy.

  9. Papahotnuts

    14 premature retared kids VS. 8 Half-Slants in a Battle to the Death.

    Hello Spike TV. You’re welcome.

  10. steph

    best joke ever.. Octomom saying “stop pulling at straws for attention” to kate…
    Ok who’s the worst mom ever?!!! One who make her 8 kids work or one that have 14 children for her own bennefit???….
    For real, WTF with this people!… I feel sorry for all the 14+8= 22 kids they’ve… ’cause this “attention” will cause them thousands of dollars in the psy in the future…

  11. mikeock

    I say both of them would eat their young if you pointed a camera at them and waved a checkbook.

  12. meat eater

    a cow calling another cow a cow.


  13. meat eater

    a cow calling another cow a cow.


  14. YM

    can you imagine having sex with this woman. Eight kids at one time? You could probably put the kids back in her if you wanted. Octo-pussy?

  15. If true, this is the most scripted ‘controversy’ since Paris was lit up all green just minutes before her lame-ass show was launched. Fuck ‘em all in the eye with a rusty spike, every last celebrity. From now on, here’s the rule: If you are on TS, you need to be skull fucked first.

  16. Shallow Val

    Lets throw em into a pit and they can fight to the death. Winner gets shot in the face. One small step for reality tv, one giant step for population control.

  17. Jim Jones

    I say lock them both in a cell for the rest of their lives with their kids; they can all feed off one another until the last one starves to death. So tired of these so-called celebrities wasting time and attention from more important matters, like world news and nipple slips.

  18. DCMikeRotch

    That from someone carring around a diaper bag and wrecked uterus, both full of headshots.

    Until they let their gaping vages go at it like a Michael Vick dogfight, I really wish they’d just fuck off.

  19. Mister Bored

    yay. the battle of the overused uteri.

    how about we just ignore them and hope they get their tubes tied or their uterus fall out.

  20. Paula

    They’re both so fuckin gross it slays me that they’re considered newsworthy for having the worlds biggest fucking cunts. Suleman is a low brow bitch that is one IQ point away from being retarded herself and Kate is a fucking money grubbin, whore. blah.

  21. Heidi Salami

    Is a fallen uterus fight like a pillow fight?

  22. Christina

    This whole thing makes no sense. I don’t think most people actually watch Jon and Kate’s show because if you did, you’d know that it’s only been in the last 6-8 months or so that Kate seems like she’s really into the money part of it. For the most part, the first few seasons of the show were 100% about the kids and their daily lives. They occassionally had a vacation and the kids got special days with their parents, but for the most part, it’s only been the last season or so that the influence of the show is exceedingly obvious. I don’t think Kate is a horrible mom by any means, and her kids all seem pretty happy and healthy.

    I haven’t been following the Octomom thing, but she has NO right to say ANYTHING like she did. I watched the video, and she keeps scoffing at what Dr. Phil says to Kate, saying that not everyone has the same experience, which Kate herself then says. She points out how different their situations are, and yet Octomom (who fucking got a trademark on that name, yet she insults Kate? Huh?) just keeps attacking Kate. The last thing from Dr. Phil’s inverview that they show is Kate expressing concerns for Octomom’s mental health and this is somehow worthy of an attack on Kate?

    Kate isn’t perfect, but she didn’t set out to have as many kids as she does. She and Jon had twins and wanted one more and ended up with sextuplets. Octomom had 6 young kids, no partner to help raise them, no job and therefore little, if any, money coming in, and STILL chose to have another child that ended up being 8. So yeah, both had a huge number of children at the same time that are all healthy, and both already had kids, but that’s where the differences end. Kate didn’t attack Octomom, yet Octomom attacks Kate for expressing concern over Octomom’s mental state of mind, which is a perfectly logical concern. This is all ridiculous and I can’t believe I even bothered writing out a comment this long, but whatever.

  23. Yoda

    Can someone please tell me why the State of California hasn’t stepped in yet and taken all those retarded babies away from the Octopussy whore yet?

    Kate may be a castrating succubus from Hell, but she at least pretends to take care of her children unlike that welfare tramp insulting her.

  24. Miss Brown Eyes

    Where the WWF or WCW when you REALLY need a reason to have a smackdown fight in the deathcage. Damn I’d even pony up some pay-per-view money to see those two cunts beat the ever lovin’ crap out of each other.

    The winner? They get to plead their case to Child Protective Services. Although we know that the answer is already been bought off in the negative! HAHA

  25. Gerald_Tarrant

    A whole new meaning to fighting in the “Octogon”.

  26. J

    Octomom must be on drugs or something..what does she call what she is doing? She seems a little envious of Kate in my opinion. Kate has something she wants. Her own show and 8 lil cuties! Go suck a dick with your fat lips lady..TEAM KATE!!!!! :)

  27. I Am Canadian

    Saw a clip of Octomom. Looks like the crazy bitch had her lips done again. For a while there her lips almost looked normal.

    She looks like a monkey (sorry to all monkeys) trying to peel a banana when she speaks.

  28. yoohoo

    Anyone else notice that it looks like Kate has a giant maxi-pad stuffed in her bikini? And her tummy tuck scar is totally visible. Nice look.


  30. lily12

    There is a more interesting site than this*******www.cougarcircle.com*****It is where single women and men come together for the mutual online dating experience.and it is for free. I lilke the site!

  31. Anna

    For Papahotnuts with comment #9 – they’re not Half-Slants – they are Quarter-Slants (even though they look more asian than half asian Jon)

  32. Octomom is a national disgrace – her kids should be given to decent people to raise and she should be locked up till she’s too old to have any more babies.

  33. Guys more NSFW pics here



  34. His Huge Greatness Himself

    How about a ring bitch fight between these two? With Angelina Jolie as the referee?

  35. Darth

    @34 Great idea! These kinda shows we like! These bitches can contact us! Big $$ to make!

  36. Nero

    Doesn’t Octomom want a year free Starbuck’s coffee? We give all Kate Gosselin’s kids a new shovel and pail set! And we will give her a new bikini!

  37. His Huge Greatness Himself

    We’ll give Angelina Jolie the biggest honour to recieve on the Earth’s surface.Entertaining my men in their spartanic hut!

  38. Gando

    @37 That’s even a bigger honor than receiving a Nobel’s price!

  39. Apparently the MOMMY WARS has replaced BRIDE WARS (not the stupid movie). It’s a bunch of stupid women who believe they have to have competitions over the stuff most people just deal with.

    And I love the part where Nadia disses Kate cuz Kate had a tummy tuck. Nadia “would NEVER” have a tummy tuck. BUT LOOK AT HER FACE! PLEASE!!!!!!

  40. ash

    all I have to say is “MTV, bring back Celebrity Death Match!”

  41. Billy Blog Thorton

    Having sex with either one of these Octo-ho’s would be like throwing a hot dog in a hallway.

  42. Cosmo

    Octomom better hope it is the kids that fight. Cause she doesn’t wanna mess with Kate. Or else she will be on the ground beneath Kate’s powerful legs and feet.

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