Octomom in a Bikini: This is happening.

January 18th, 2010 // 424 Comments

Well, this was inevitable. That being said, who the hell picks up a camera and goes, “Hey, you know what would be awesome to capture forever? Nadya Suleman in a bikini”? I honestly didn’t think there were that many drugs on the planet. Also, not to scare anybody, but you know there’s a sex tape just around the corner and I guarantee you it’ll contain this exchange:

OCTOMOM: Stick it in!
DUDE: I can’t, there’s a day care falling out.

Sign me up for that.

Thanks to Matt Varden. But not really.

superficial

  1. God

    Sorry everyone. I had these pictures commissioned for an exhibition I’m putting together up here in heaven(TM) called: “When messenger ribonucleic acid rejects the lord.” The whole thing is kind of a joke around here, you know, how bad things can get when the system gets a mind of its own and basically fucks up. And it isn’t just in the looks department either. Fuck no. This brain is pretty messed up inside. Little bits of cork and lead paint chips if you know what I mean. Anyhow, gotta get going now. I need to create some more panic and fear before people start thinking for themselves again…

  2. SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD! SUPER HAGGARD!

  3. Kill the photographer

    Who in the fuckery thought this was a good idea? Why is anyone giving this mentally bizarre whore ANY publicity? She’s whelped 14 pups, and tries to “look sexhay” so some other dude will fuck her & give her more larvae? This is wrong; oh so wrong…

  4. Carolyn

    She looks like holy hell. But, she has those big fake American boobs that the old US of A men love so much.

  5. Hugh Gentry

    nice boobies

  6. God

    Sorry everyone, these are photos I had commissioned for a little exhibition up here in Heaven (TM) called “When messenger ribonucleic acid rejects the Lord (SM).” The whole thing is meant to showcase how bad the system can get messed up when just one element gets a mind of its own. I guess while I’m at it I should remind you that unless you all start to kiss my ass real soon, your whole world could look like this. It’s not just about looks either, the brain is also affected. So keep those Republicans at bay. Just a friendly tip from the one who knows everything. And again, sorry about the misdirected photos. These were meant for our eyes only, and I also apologize for the retinal stains you will still see all night as you try to sleep it off…

  7. Jones

    Honestly, I’ve seen way, way worse.

  8. God

    I’m starting to repeat myself. Too much beer.

  9. jg

    Is that Janeane Garofalo?

  10. Mr. T

    seriously fucking her must be like throwing a hot dog weiner down a darkened hallway……

  11. Pincuid

    It’s like the awful awful lovechild of Angelina Jolie and Amy Winehouse. Damn!

  12. Turd Ferguson

    Who’s taking care of the kids while she’s out whoring it up?
    Oh, that’s right, the taxpayers are paying for her childcare and welfare.

  13. Pok

    Any guy who FAPs to this is a loser.

  14. tallywacker

    I bet if you put your ear to her vagina, you can hear the ocean.

  15. IbePiglet

    Look at the colorized pixels…it’s NOT good airbrushing, it’s amateur photoshop. Where the hell are the children when she indulges selfishly in these idiotic escapades? What a waste of life, a complete waste.

  16. Name (required):

    Seriously…They couldn’t airbrush her stomach in that post pic? Disgusting.

  17. Mark Stretch

    So who’s babysitting?

  18. misterfister

    I just threw up in my mouth! Probably taste better than her greasy tuna hole though…

  19. wow

    You know if Randal has something bad to say about it, it’s seriously awful.

  20. wow

    You know if Randal has something bad to say about it, it’s seriously awful.

  21. mitch

    Her bellybutton looks like a coin slot made for fifty cent pieces. Thank God these pics are of such poor quality.

  22. Cuntacular

    She’s gotta nice rack but that vertical belly button is just…..I don’t know how to describe it.

    I hope her bologna flaps down there have been restored and re-tightened.

  23. Scudworth

    Her bellybutton is odd-looking. Her rack is a good distraction though.

  24. dont get mad, get Rough

    Uh oh! look whos getting ready to be on the hunt for more sperm donations…Grandma always told me what you do, affect the way you look, now I see what she meant..

  25. LT81

    Well, points to her for not being airbrushed. Wait, what – they ARE airbrushed?? Oh, ok….hmm.

  26. abby

    You can tell she would be pretty if she didn’t have all that shit done to her face.

  27. Veronica

    you are giving her exactly what she wants.

    Please don’t encourage her.

  28. noave

    disgusting face/body. a poor mans tranny.

  29. Noelle

    Ewwwww…. disgusting

  30. medi0169

    WHAT A PIG. Please someone seal up her uterus.

  31. Spicy

    Well… she just looks like… she had 14 children. How could someone have created this photo shoot with sincerity.

    shameful…. she looks like friggen GOLLUM. does anyone else see the resemblance?

  32. Realist

    She’s smoking hot…for a dude with tits.

  33. Noel

    She has those BOOT LIPS like a nigger and looks like that Alien Queen. And big ole Meat Flaps her balls are her FEED BLADDERS :)

  34. Noel

    She has those BOOT LIPS like a nigger and looks like that Alien Queen. And big ole Meat Flaps her balls are her FEED BLADDERS :)

  35. Hugh Jorgan

    @59 – Janine Garafalo ! Fucking hilarious

  36. Meeps

    Why when I see these pix do I hear Heath Ledger rasping, “Why so serious?”

  37. Spicy ... (wants to throw up)

    GOLLUM, GOLLUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FEMALE GOLLUM, GOLLUM. A GOLLUMMESS. SHES A FREAKING GOLLUMMESS

  38. pimp

    FUCK YOU FISH!! FUCK YOU RIGHT IN THE ASS YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!

  39. Gil64

    Ill give her fish bait

  40. jim eh

    Even the Joker needs some lovin’

  41. Armenia For Life

    UGHHHH!!! . . . I just threw up in my mouth. What has this world come to?

  42. missywissy

    #30 – seriously lol

  43. Rosie

    This woman has serious mental issues. No more please.

  44. joe blow

    I’ll be damned… someone shaved a dog’s ass and taught it to walk backwards… in a bikini.

  45. MommaDuck

    But why is it happening?

  46. Enna

    Dear Octomom,

    You simply must stop showing yourself in public. From the ball implants in your cheeks, to your freakishly hideous lips, to your ghastly belly button, you are a monstrosity.

    Please do the world a favor and don’t come out of your house at all anymore. Ever. If you were to do that, at least you would be home taking care of your 14 children. You do remember them, don’t you?

    Best Wishes,

    A Concerned Citizen

  47. Racer X

    We are VERY near the year 2012.

  48. The Listener

    After reading all of these comments I feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone.

    I don’t get at all why everyone’s so critical of her body.

    The woman looks just fine in her bikini. And the fact that she looks this good after all of the children she’s had is even more amazing.

    BTW People should keep in mind she’s a mom, not a supermodel.

  49. RebelMinion

    Why do I always think of this character from the craptastic movie “Millennium” every time I look at her?

    http://www.cinemademerde.com/Millennium-skinface.gif

  50. AnnaDraconida

    MY EYES. THEY BLEED.

Leave A Comment