Nicole Richie looked uncharacteristically hot (for her) at the Carnival of Hope gala over the weekend. I say uncharacteristically because she usually looks like Gollum with tits. How she pulled off this miraculous transformation is beyond me, but I’ve got top scientists over at NASA looking into it.
UPDATE: Got a reply!
TO: The Superficial
SUBJECT: Re: URGENT: Nicole Richie gave me a boner, please advisePerhaps I wasn’t clear in our last correspondence, so let me simplify the terms:
We make rockets go “BOOM” so Joe the Spaceman can fly to the moon.
I really don’t know how to make that anymore understandable without the use of puppets, so for the last time, stop e-mailing us.
That said, the bitch stopped doing H.Peace out,
Dr. Scott Brooks,
NASAP.S. QUIT POSTING ABOUT HEIDI & SPENCER!
tly | October 27, 2008 at 7:18 pm
She is kinda hot !
juniorstarr | October 27, 2008 at 7:18 pm
its the dress. fuckin fabulous.
Mar | October 27, 2008 at 7:18 pm
Primera!
juniorstarr | October 27, 2008 at 7:19 pm
its the dress. fuckin fabulous.
justtheobvious | October 27, 2008 at 7:25 pm
She looks like a mattress monkey. I bet she is a lot of fun in the sack. But her face kind of needs a sack too… But I think she would look great with my cock in her mouth.
Cartman | October 27, 2008 at 7:28 pm
She’s no Heidi Montag!
canshy | October 27, 2008 at 7:30 pm
Shes much more attractive than the walkin skeleton she was a few years ago…
I still liked her chunkier.
Ronnie Mund | October 27, 2008 at 7:30 pm
She still looks like Garfield the Cat.
Thomas Payne | October 27, 2008 at 7:34 pm
EWWWWWWWWWW no way…it’s the face that precludes her from ever being called “hot”.
Thomas Payne | October 27, 2008 at 7:34 pm
EWWWWWWWWWW no way…it’s the face that precludes her from ever being called “hot”.
spamfighter | October 27, 2008 at 7:46 pm
OK, I’m gay. I would not hit that, unless it was with a shovel.
cfuse | October 27, 2008 at 8:14 pm
I don’t understand why so many people get excited over a woman who could only be considered plain and mousey under the best of circumstances.
She is too thin (dangerously so), dresses like a scarecrow, and has no skills or talents to warrant the attention she receives. How does this make her attractive in any way?
pirhan | October 27, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Not bad actually.
And you should do what NASA scientist says – NO MORE Heidi and Spencer. Unless of course it’s plastic surgery gone wrong/eaten by a wild boar coverage. :)
Ed Castillo | October 27, 2008 at 8:41 pm
I don’t know if she’s had the vaginal reconstruction that would be needed to get into my bed after she shit out a kid. But to me she was at her hottest when she had an eating disorder (hey, you say “tomato”…I say “great body”). Until you’ve been with a woman and felt their pelvis about to snap under you, you haven’t experienced life!
Laetitia | October 27, 2008 at 8:51 pm
You guys! Nicole is HOT! and she is far more intelligent than any celebrity featured here which exhibits itself in her wit and sense of humour. I really enjoy watching her and she looks better than ever here. She should have never gotten involved with paris who btw looks scarily OLD lately
why not | October 27, 2008 at 9:14 pm
she is a lot better looking than that chubby rat faced clown aguilera
pelps | October 27, 2008 at 9:15 pm
Really?
Isn’t she the hot Milf on === Agelessmate.com ==== ?? it’s the real place where hot cougars and milfs hang out with sexy young men!! My friends told me so, gonna check it out!!
FRIST!!! | October 27, 2008 at 9:40 pm
Still, I bet Julian King consumed more calories, lifetime, than Nicole Richie ever will. He might not have been able to figure out the doorlock on a car, or even how to duck, but he certainly wasn’t cheated at the dinner table.
Randal | October 27, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Nicole, you’re looking as beautiful as ever! Short and sweet, just like my response.
Love ya! xoxo
Randal
veggi | October 27, 2008 at 10:00 pm
The bad news is that she still looks like a praying mantis.
The good news is that she was last seen loading her kid into a white Suburban…
Jamie's Uterus | October 27, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Why is this bug eyed troll famous again? Anyone?
Randal's Rectum | October 27, 2008 at 10:13 pm
I bet Randal would have loved Stalin and Hitler too. Cuz they were famous!
Get back on your belly bitch, there’s a cock headed for your ass.
DaBA | October 27, 2008 at 10:42 pm
She’s wearing a wig. Doesn’t anyone notice that? Anorexia makes you lose your hair. Poor kid.
loogi | October 27, 2008 at 11:02 pm
i like her she’s funny and her style lately is unique.. i loooove her baby which seams like her new purse! she doesnt go anywhere with out her!!
go nicole :***
Ronnie Mund | October 27, 2008 at 11:20 pm
Nicole=Garfield
http://i13.tinypic.com/6on08yt.jpg
scabbeus | October 27, 2008 at 11:28 pm
No talent and no education. It makes me wonder if she even kows how her body works and to provide proper hygiene. In other words, I see her as stupid, spoiled, stinky and skanky.
I am sure cunnilingus in her household is non existent…well there is always the chihuahua!
And finally, Obama has only contributed to lowering living standards in Chicago. His ideas for the country will doom us forever – please don’t be fooled.
jlylec | October 27, 2008 at 11:38 pm
she still looks like golum with tits…he just put a dress on and picked up a purse. puke in my mouth.
Pedro De Pacas | October 27, 2008 at 11:45 pm
She looks like a fucking lizard. Any minute now her tongue will flick and catch a fly.
Get your fucking ass home bitch and take care of you kid! Puta!
Pedro De Pacas | October 27, 2008 at 11:45 pm
She looks like a fucking lizard. Any minute now her tongue will flick and catch a fly.
Get your fucking ass home bitch and take care of your kid! Puta!
Pedro De Pacas | October 27, 2008 at 11:47 pm
Fuck this puta! She looks like a pinchi fucking lizard about to trap a fly.
Mirvy | October 28, 2008 at 12:12 am
# 18 Looks like you weren’t ever cheated at the dinner table either. Oh, and you’re a sick fuck to make a comment like that.
LivewireT | October 28, 2008 at 12:15 am
#22 That was so funny!!!!! LOL I almost choked on my ice cream…
gerard Vandenberg | October 28, 2008 at 12:18 am
…………….is it a weasel?
………………………is it a mouse?
nooooooooooooo, IT’S NICOLE RICHIE!!
meborg | October 28, 2008 at 12:19 am
Not even attractive anti Milf did anyone want this in the first place?
MBA Nixon | October 28, 2008 at 12:37 am
Good thing her dad is rich and famous, because Wrong Way doesn’t have looks or any discernible skills.
friendlyfires | October 28, 2008 at 12:38 am
In the long run, Nicole Ritchie is going to have the last laugh on a lot of these train-wreck tabloid spawn. We’re talking future governor of Arizona, an ambassadorship in Africa, then the Vice Presidency. And still be a MILF.
brainless | October 28, 2008 at 12:59 am
Not even for an evening.
Wild One | October 28, 2008 at 1:20 am
# 18 is NOT FRIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You fucking sick stalking fuck!!!!
She would never say something like that. Take a look at anypast comments from her and they are during the daytime! I hope she rips you a new asshole you fucking sick bastard!!!
jesse | October 28, 2008 at 4:31 am
hi!
anyone want to tell me what “doing H’ means?
I have no idea… cheers
jesse | October 28, 2008 at 4:32 am
hi!
anyone want to tell me what “doing H’ means?
I have no idea… cheers
Urbanspaceman | October 28, 2008 at 5:22 am
I smell rubber.
breastfeedingmum | October 28, 2008 at 6:15 am
please….all that breast feeding and pregnancy give her some tits.
1moreidiotintheworld | October 28, 2008 at 7:17 am
She looks like some greasy skank who should be serving me coffee at the local Steak-n-Shake at 3 AM….as I stare at her drunk off my ass, thinking “I could hit that…. Yeah….” Oh gawd no!! More coffee!!!!!! MORE COFFEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alex | October 28, 2008 at 8:16 am
Nicole is hot. She looks way better with darker hair, though.
mike | October 28, 2008 at 8:19 am
Nope, not yet….
Bickus Dickus | October 28, 2008 at 9:14 am
I wouldn’t fuck that with Randall’s dick.
Is she going for the “Jew who survived the Holocaust in a Nazi war camp” look and this is taken the day of her release? Skinny retarded cunt hag.
If by some bizarre circumstance I ever actually had a chance to fuck this twat, I’d act like I was gonna be all into it, and then I’d stand up and piss on her. Filming the whole thing and posting it on you tube. My only regret would be that I didn’t get to piss on her and Paris Hilton at the same time.
Joejam2845 | October 28, 2008 at 9:45 am
It’s amazing how attractive women can look when they gain some weight! How anyone thinks this 90 lbs. crap is attractive is beyond me!
Lola | October 28, 2008 at 9:47 am
Oh come on people… Compare her now to what she looked like before… She’s actually a little attractive. Everyone would look this good if their parents were millionaires
Ted Mosby | October 28, 2008 at 10:10 am
She’s got good funbags.
James | October 28, 2008 at 10:14 am
idea! In accordance with what now must be considered NASA guidelines, how about if you must* post about heidi and spencer, at the very least don’t include their pictures. Instead use pictures of Adriana Lima in lingerie or Screen Caps from Walker Texas Ranger or something. (OR BOTH)
* By “Must” i mean Heidi has you in some clockwork orange style eyelid clamps and is threatening to make you watch videos of spencer jerking it to McCain campaign ads.
Which is banned by the geneva convention and should get her terrorist ass arrested!