Nicole Richie earns MILF status for an evening

Nicole Richie looked uncharacteristically hot (for her) at the Carnival of Hope gala over the weekend. I say uncharacteristically because she usually looks like Gollum with tits. How she pulled off this miraculous transformation is beyond me, but I’ve got top scientists over at NASA looking into it.

UPDATE: Got a reply!

TO: The Superficial
SUBJECT: Re: URGENT: Nicole Richie gave me a boner, please advise

Perhaps I wasn’t clear in our last correspondence, so let me simplify the terms:

We make rockets go “BOOM” so Joe the Spaceman can fly to the moon.

I really don’t know how to make that anymore understandable without the use of puppets, so for the last time, stop e-mailing us.
That said, the bitch stopped doing H.

Peace out,

Dr. Scott Brooks,