Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban have quietly thumbed their noses at celebs brokering baby photo deals. Probably not a smart move because I’m pretty sure Angelina Jolie could take Nicole in a fight. In fact, in the sake of research, I’m going to imagine such a battle right now. “Pow! BAM! Ziff! Use the battering ram, Nicole!” While I’m performing my journalistic duties, scope out what a friend of Nicole’s told the Sydney Morning Herald. “BOFF! Eek! Ease up, Angelina. She’s Australian!”:
“They don’t think it’s appropriate to make deals. They are still deciding how they feel about – if and when they will release a photo at all. But they realise there is enormous interest from the public and they are grateful and appreciative of that,” the source said.
Damn, if they’re just giving them away, I’ll get in on that. Give me two 8 x 10s and some wallets. I can’t guarantee I won’t pretend I’m a single father to pick up chicks at the mall – because I’m going to. So, can you maybe Photoshop Sunday Rose a bit? You know, make her look like the fruit of my loins. Just add a knife between her teeth and eyes that can see into a woman’s soul. (Read: Give her those X-Ray glasses with the spirals for lenses.)