Nicolas Cage stole Chihuahuas

January 23rd, 2008 // 49 Comments

Actress Kathleen Turner’s upcoming autobiography “Send Yourself Roses” includes dirt on her Peggy Sue Got Married co-star Nicolas Cage. The movie was directed by Nic’s uncle Francis Ford Coppola and apparently the future Ghost Rider was a pain in the ass on set, according to Page Six:

“Everything Francis wanted him to do, he went against to show that he wasn’t under his uncle’s wing. Which was ridiculous. Oh, that stupid voice of his and the fake teeth! Honestly, I cringe to think about it. He caused so many problems,” Turner writes. “He was arrested twice for drunk driving and, I think, once for stealing a dog. He’d come across a Chihuahua he liked and stuck it in his jacket.”

A Chihuahua in the jacket, huh? That’s bush league. One time I smuggled a Great Dane and two Pomeranians in my pants. I’ll let you read between the lines on that one… ladies. (Hint: I love puppies!)

Photo: Splash News
superficial

  1. poff poff pass

    get with it

  2. Anonymous

    Hey Dating Website Troll:

    Hi there, I’m a loser with no life. I’m paid $3.50 per hour to post idiotic drivel, directing you to some lame dating website that takes your money and gives you nothing in return. I have no job, so I sit around all day and post this garbage on as many websites as I can under many different aliases. I don’t have any friends, so I must rely on these moronic posts to make myself feel better about myself. My mother hates me and dropped me on my head as a child. You can find me at I’mAnIdiotTrollWithNoLifeAndShouldBeKilled.com
    I heard Jamie Lynn Spears met her older man, I mean match, at this site.

    Richromances.com and all those other fucking dating sites that get spammed around here are all registered to this asshole. Du Qiang ecomfun@aol.com 800 West El Camino Real, #180 Mountain View, California 94040 United States 650-906-0405

  3. fergernauster

    Kathleen Turner ROX…

  4. I love Nick Cage..

  5. my comment

    Didn’t he marry some 20 yr old asian waitress?

  6. LadyJane

    I have always wanted to kick this fuckface right in the vagina.

  7. D. Richards (Father.)

    I remember when this all happened. Nick Cage was dating an anorexic woman (he likes ‘em sickly) who, much to his chagrin, agreed to allow ol’ Nicky to sodomize her ass only if, Cage could steal a full sized chihuahua and stuff the entire dog in to his butt-chute.

    Nick lost out; he got as close as the entire dog, except for the back feet, which stuck out of his ass like rat legs being swallowed by a python.

    Cage’s ass eats head first!

  8. Snarf

    This bitch has a big mouth.

  9. The ad to the right says “Halloween is Coming!”

    Yeah, so is Christmas, we get one every year..

  10. DAF

    This guy is cute. seems saw him on a celebrity and millioniare dating site like millionairefriends.com or something. But don’t know if it is him.

  11. It's me Fuckers

    Nick Cage freaks me out. I think he is on par with J Lo’s zombie. They are both creapy as hell. Every movie he has been in could have been 100% better by having someone else do his role. The only reason the man gets laid is because of the money and ‘movie image’. Some women will fuck anything. Even Nick Cage. *shudder* Can you imagine him pumping at you and sweating over you? *gags* All red faced. I bet he whimpers when he shoots his load. I think I have to go puke now. I even grossed myself out…

  12. It's me Fuckers

    Nick Cage freaks me out. I think he is on par with J Lo’s zombie. They are both creapy as hell. Every movie he has been in could have been 100% better by having someone else do his role. The only reason the man gets laid is because of the money and ‘movie image’. Some women will fuck anything. Even Nick Cage. *shudder* Can you imagine him pumping at you and sweating over you? *gags* All red faced. I bet he whimpers when he shoots his load. I think I have to go puke now. I even grossed myself out…

  13. It's me Fuckers

    Nick Cage freaks me out. I think he is on par with J Lo’s zombie. They are both creapy as hell. Every movie he has been in could have been 100% better by having someone else do his role. The only reason the man gets laid is because of the money and ‘movie image’. Some women will fuck anything. Even Nick Cage. *shudder* Can you imagine him pumping at you and sweating over you? *gags* All red faced. I bet he whimpers when he shoots his load. I think I have to go puke now. I even grossed myself out…

  14. Anonymous

    Hey DAF:

    Hi there, I’m a loser with no life. I’m paid $3.50 per hour to post idiotic drivel, directing you to some lame dating website that takes your money and gives you nothing in return. I have no job, so I sit around all day and post this garbage on as many websites as I can under many different aliases. I don’t have any friends, so I must rely on these moronic posts to make myself feel better about myself. My mother hates me and dropped me on my head as a child. You can find me at I’mAnIdiotTrollWithNoLifeAndShouldBeKilled.com
    I heard Jamie Lynn Spears met her older man, I mean match, at this site.

    Richromances.com and all those other fucking dating sites that get spammed around here are all registered to this asshole. Du Qiang ecomfun@aol.com 800 West El Camino Real, #180 Mountain View, California 94040 United States 650-906-0405

  15. fergernauster

    #11… Heh heh heh… and as he’s gasping & sweating o’er your quivering body, you – in additional horror – come to realize his breath reminds you of…

    a.) Tom Cruise’s vaginal juice;
    b.) Oprah’s two-day-old tampon; or
    c.) Britney’s tots’ preserved yet blackened umbilical cords.

  16. jrz

    Is Chihuahua Smuggling anything like Hide the Salami?

  17. fergernauster

    Fake teeth and face like melting wax.

  18. Bob

    Is that Eva Mendez with mr. cage in that picture?

  19. #16 I love that game

  20. I hate him more if that picture means he is dating Eva Mendes.

    http://theunsoberlife.com

  21. yukadoozer

    #2-Awesome.
    I’ve always had a deep disdain for Nicholas “Nick” Cage. His acting career should’ve ended at Valley Girls. But no. He’s still here makin his rounds to the cosmetic surgeons.

  22. nipolian

    Nick has done some really good movies:

    Raising Arizona
    Leaving Las Vegas
    The Rock
    The Family Man

    But I think he may have just jumped the shark with Ghost Rider.

  23. Wanna play that game FRIST?

  24. Auntie Kryst

    @22 That movie “Birdie” was good too. I think that is what it was called. These days this douche just jumps for a paycheck, he’ll star in anything.

  25. scoby

    man how on earth is that woman’s dress staying up? such nice boobies and skin.

  26. noneyobeezwax

    i thought kathleen turner was dead. well shit, i wonder who that was i buried in my back yard? oh well, what’s done is done.

  27. BunnyButt

    Eh, no big surprise. I’ve always found him creepy and annoying to the point of being unwatchable, and he was at his slimiest ickiness in “Peggy Sue”. The only movie I’ve been able to tolerate him in was “8mm”, primarily because he somehow managed to totally suppress his inherent twitchiness. Meanwhile, my best friend is a huge fan and eagerly goes to see his movies as soon as they’re released. Damn, I think I need to find a new best friend!

  28. RENEE...

    Ah, wasn’t that movie from like 20 years ago? I’m sure Nick has probably grown up a bit since then and was, what, like 20 yrs old at the time? Most guys are pretty immature at that age. And who knows what he was smoking on top of that. I’m sure he’s put down the bong or whatever by now and mellowed out. Now Kathleen Turner, on the other hand…talking abt annoying voices! Manly ass woman! And I’m sure she’s a big, giant pain in the ass diva to boot…sheesh!

  29. Ballsak

    Con Air may have been the shark-jumping moment for Mr Cage.

  30. YAWN. Anyone who buys a Katleen Turner bio deserves to be removed from the gene pool.

  31. The White Urkele

    I would put a 9mm sized hole in his over sized forehead if he tried to steal my Chihuahua. Valley Girl was his best movie ever.

  32. rustingrabbit

    Kathleen Turner was Jessica Rabbit, I love her voice.

    And his voice was horrid during that movie. He sounded like a 4 year old girl. who would ocassionally squeak in some lower notes here or there. Even when he was supposed to be like, what, 40,50? he sounded like a girl wimpering. Was not a fan of him in that movie.

  33. anonymous

    HELLO…..WHY YOU ARE REPORTING ABOUT NICK’S HAIR WHEN YOU ARE CLEARLY MISSING THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS PIC??????……EVA’S NEARLY PERFECT (and by nearly perfect I mean so beyond perfect) BOOBIES!

  34. anonymous

    HELLO…..WHY YOU ARE REPORTING ABOUT NICK’S HAIR WHEN YOU ARE CLEARLY MISSING THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS PIC??????……EVA’S NEARLY PERFECT (and by nearly perfect I mean so beyond perfect) BOOBIES!

  35. anonymous

    HELLO…..WHY YOU ARE REPORTING ABOUT NICK’S HAIR WHEN YOU ARE CLEARLY MISSING THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS PIC??????……EVA’S NEARLY PERFECT (and by nearly perfect I mean so beyond perfect) BOOBIES!

  36. so he was always an egoentric douchebag. good to know, i suppose.

    oh internet, how you teach me things.
    http://www.cracked.com/article_15822_5-douchebag-behaviors-explained-by-science.html

  37. El-COyote

    All I have noted is Eva Mendes has nice tits in this post… Who is that with her?

  38. I thought Peggy sue got married was a great flick back in the day, and one of the main reasons was Nicks performance…the way the character talked, the teeth, everything about it was on the money…it was funny, but more important it made the character unique and someone you could sympathize with. What would have otherwise been a throwaway roll became something a lot better.
    Obviously the dude has done some lousy movies…kinda like our generations Michael Caine….but c’mon…Turner???? how many eons has it been since romancing the stone?….atleast nick doesn’t cop to the fake german accents kathleen’s been kicking out for the past decade…

  39. EuroNeckPain

    They now sell breast implants with a dress already stapled to them.

  40. FCS

    And this guy still lives? sheesh

  41. Sparqi

    Is there a reason Eva Mendes is in this photo; other than to provide fodder for a fantasy in which a quick grasp and downward tug on her dress would reveal all the spicy latina boob-tacular point-nippled goodness one could ever hope for?

  42. Bonny

    Oh gawd, he’s starting to look like some creepy-ass vampire. LAY OFF THE BOTOX, NICOLAS CAGE.

  43. PTG

    This post needs more Viggo Mortensen balls.

  44. Ted from LA

    My weiner gives her one thumbs up.

  45. No more Britney Shitney Please

    holy shit Eva Mendez is one fine piece of ass. fish, more posts of mendez getting naked for some cause.

  46. Kathleen!! You are beautiful woman. I like your skirt. You are elegant! Wanna see more beautiful and sweet women on bbwconnect..com. First, i can’t help recommending this website to you. Because i found my fiance on this site those days. I am so happy. Maybe you will enjoy it. GOOD LUCK!

  47. Rubbertoe

    Was it a snake skin jacket??

  48. Mandi

    Wait a minute… KATHLEEN TURNER said Nick Cage has an annoying voice…..?

  49. Mark

    Looks like Andy Kaufman.

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