In case there was any doubt in your mind that Nicky Hilton’s new Miami hotel Nicky O isn’t going to be a complete joke, check out this photoshoot she had for it featuring a bunch of naked people. I know the Hilton family education consists of Saturday morning cartoons, but this is the sort of marketing campaign you’d use for beer, condoms, or homoerotic cruises where you question your own sexuality. The only hotels that should be marketed this way charge by the hour and have women on the first floor walking around with price tags on them.
Don’t click any of the NSFW pictures if you’re offended by male genitalia or the female buttocks, because there’s plenty of both all around. Thanks to Mark for the tip, and for reminding me why I don’t scour the internet looking for naked pictures of men.
okiedoke | October 19, 2006 at 10:34 am
First!!!
jazzdrummer420 | October 19, 2006 at 10:34 am
What the fuck?!?!?
Is all I gotta say
BigJim | October 19, 2006 at 10:36 am
Nicky may like standing next to them, but Paris likes inserting them into every possible orifice as often as possible.
commissioner | October 19, 2006 at 10:39 am
I enjoy standing next to penises. What’s wrong with that?
That guy does have old man balls. Must be very hot there.
Ramdonomo | October 19, 2006 at 10:39 am
Oh, HELLO.
I gives a good GODDAMN about the Hotel of Fingerpainting Messes or whatever, just send the guy on the far right to MY room: 6969.
Kthnx.
People in Miami are certainly FREE with their bodies.
*cares not about the Hiltons*
DancingQueen | October 19, 2006 at 10:40 am
Dude in the last pic with his schlong hanging out should put his pants back on. Either that or I better get my magnifying glass.
tweetyeyes | October 19, 2006 at 10:40 am
Is that a tail hanging out the top of her ass?
y3n0 | October 19, 2006 at 10:40 am
Ballsy “business plan”!
Italian Stallion | October 19, 2006 at 10:40 am
The guy on the right apologized for having such a small dick. He said he took a Viagra before the photoshoot, but it got stuck in his throat. He didn’t come to anymore photoshoot’s after that, he was compaining about a stiff neck……….
AlwayzOn | October 19, 2006 at 10:40 am
what the fuck are they doing on the roof?
is that a life saver in the papi guy’s mouth in pic 2? or some weird giant tongue ring?
Ed Bambrick | October 19, 2006 at 10:42 am
TCLTC!
I guess NHLTC, too!
tweetyeyes | October 19, 2006 at 10:44 am
I would never show my face if my nuts hung lower that my weiner. It looks as if someone has just stitched them on. There hanging by a thread.
tweetyeyes | October 19, 2006 at 10:45 am
sorry, I before e except after c?
Tra | October 19, 2006 at 10:46 am
I’m confused, why is she dressed and everyone around her is naked? Please explain someone. Am I just not getting it?
pinky_nip | October 19, 2006 at 10:48 am
Nice vagina, dude.
Alex | October 19, 2006 at 10:49 am
#12 quote: I would never show my face if my nuts hung lower that my weiner.
Very true. Although, having a large penis is not all it is cracked up to be. Not fun at all when all you get is, “I’m can’t put THAT in me!” And, here, you have gone through all the trouble/money/bullshit parent visits to build a relationship with her and finally get her in bed. Truly sucks. Trust me.
okiedoke | October 19, 2006 at 10:50 am
Nicky and Paris have way too much freakin money and way too much time on their hands.
Cisi | October 19, 2006 at 10:52 am
You people FUNNY. I’m laughing hysterically. Moreover, thanks to many of you for the clarification – I am a nun but I THOUGHT them balls were hanging pretty low.
Colibaby | October 19, 2006 at 10:53 am
She’s trying…Give her that. Paris does nothing. Lets at least Nicky kudos for that.
sonya | October 19, 2006 at 10:53 am
Do your balls hang low, do they wobble to and fro, can you tie them in a knot, can you tie them in a bow, can you throw them over your shoulder, like a Continental soldier, do your balls hang looowwwww…..
Guy-Pierre | October 19, 2006 at 10:54 am
Oh my!! My heavens!
Aleq, we just have to stay at this hotel.
Look at all those beautiful men with their penis’ exposed.
Ooooooooooohhhhhh! I feeling a little light-headed… yet I’m erect.
Thank you Mr Superficial man. You truly are a decent human being. If you ever decide to come over to our side, feel free to check out my site. That goes for everybody.
Free Chardonnay for everyone.
Colibaby | October 19, 2006 at 10:54 am
does your cock hang high, can you slap it on your thigh…
fearsarewishes | October 19, 2006 at 10:55 am
Bumper Sticker Girl has got one kickin’ frame.
Anastasia_Beaverhausen | October 19, 2006 at 10:56 am
That dudes cock and balls look EXACTLY like the cartoon dog Mr. Peabody!
RichPort | October 19, 2006 at 10:57 am
So the best she can do to get anyone to put their dick next to her is to pay a bunch of gay guys to promote her ho-tel?
That guy in pic #4 must have one disappointed boyfriend. I guess dick steroids are in order…
mrs.t | October 19, 2006 at 10:57 am
I am so happy not to have balls. Especially saggy ones.
simon134 | October 19, 2006 at 10:58 am
I feel sorry for that one guy, he ain’t packing much heat!
I can see why he works out so much, he has to make up for being so small!
doihaveabooger | October 19, 2006 at 10:59 am
another reminder that the movie zoolander nailed the modeling profession? on the head.
they really are vacant idiots, male & female.
HolisticWisdomcom | October 19, 2006 at 11:03 am
Well, who doesn’t like standing next to a penis? They rock! Yay for a penis!
http://www.holisticwisdom.com
Brain Embolism | October 19, 2006 at 11:04 am
If your pants are loose
and your boots are tight,
you’re balls will swing from left to right.
Italian Stallion | October 19, 2006 at 11:04 am
Guy on the right: “I WAS IN THE POOL!!!”
LoneWolf | October 19, 2006 at 11:06 am
Some are grower’s and some are shower’s.
combustion8 | October 19, 2006 at 11:07 am
I see Captain Saggy Nuts made it there just in time.
Tra | October 19, 2006 at 11:08 am
Just reminds me of what I’m not getting anymore. Even if it is small, doesn’t matter on the size only matters how you use it…..
JennSTX | October 19, 2006 at 11:09 am
I think there should be more full frontal male nudity in advertising. No problem with the little penis because they can just photoshop him a bigger one and airbrush over any other non-gorgeous parts like they do in 100% of all other adverstising.
Time for guys to be continually bombarded with totally unattainable examples of male beauty. Equality in advertising and all that!
jrzmommy | October 19, 2006 at 11:09 am
To the blonde with tattoo—FUCKING EAT!
katie | October 19, 2006 at 11:12 am
i just caught up on all the Sarah Jones thing. she is a housewife with no children? what the hell does she do all day that lazy bitch?
ill tell you what she does. google “delectual” and you will see that she spends her entire day on the internet writing reviews, blogging, and generally being a waste of space.
sorry i know i am like way behind on this but i had to comment on the whole situation.
you cant get onto her blogs now. sad.
such a loser.
Scott | October 19, 2006 at 11:12 am
Nicky should show her penis.
dmarie | October 19, 2006 at 11:20 am
blonde is ugly…it must be paris.
he should have that excess skin removed, the sag is way unattractive.
FernLaplante | October 19, 2006 at 11:21 am
That guy’s got some nice giblets. yummm!
(I hate when people say crap like “he’s not packing much” that’s usually said by someone who ain’t packing at all. G.A.L.)
Geminat | October 19, 2006 at 11:26 am
That guy needs a testicle tuck….BAD
Anastasia_Beaverhausen | October 19, 2006 at 11:26 am
@37–from the looks of her “camper” on her photo site, she’s a terrible ‘housewife’ , fucking place is a mess…
Anastasia_Beaverhausen | October 19, 2006 at 11:27 am
@37–from the looks of her “camper” on her photo site, she’s a terrible ‘housewife’ , fucking place is a mess…
aliomali | October 19, 2006 at 11:29 am
Nicky doesn’t look like she is enjoying anything…ever…even in these photos.
pinky_nip | October 19, 2006 at 11:31 am
I enjoy penises that stand inside me.
commissioner | October 19, 2006 at 11:31 am
“bumper sticker girl”. Ha, ha, ha.
Instead of referring to my receptionist as a Mexican, I now have a new moniker.
tits_on_snack | October 19, 2006 at 11:35 am
The only thing that’s offending me is that naked chick’s lower-back-moustache. Arse Antlers. Call it what you want. Generic-2004-soccermom-tattoo.
bigponie | October 19, 2006 at 11:39 am
if ACDC, saw this they would change the lyrics.
“I’ve got small balls
I’ve got small balls
And they’re such small balls
Dirty small balls
And he’s got small balls,
And she’s got small balls,
But we’ve got the smallest balls of them all!
And my balls are always bouncing
My ballroom always full
And everybody comes and comes again
If your name is on the guest list
No one can take you higher
Everybody says I’ve got great balls of fire!”
jrzmommy | October 19, 2006 at 11:41 am
48–
My balls are always bouncing
To the left and to the right
And everybody comes and comes again
47–I call them “Tramp Stamps”
Spindoc | October 19, 2006 at 11:43 am
I just love the fact that Nicki is standing 2 feet from the guy in a skimpy outfit and she can’t even get a rise out of him. Damn, she is Man-repellant.