Nicky Hilton is Paris Hilton’s less-talented sister. Let that settle in your brain for a moment. Being less talented than Paris Hilton is like being less hilarious than Schindler’s List. You think she’d be happy just to be alive, but no. When she and Mischa Barton arrived separately for manager Benny Medina’s 48th-birthday party at the Regent Beverly Wilshire Saturday night, Nicky spat out, “What is that fat pig doing here?” She then went to the other side of the room where she glared at Rick Salomon, who made the infamous porn tape with her sister Paris. Other guests at the party happily partied ’til the wee hours.
Nicky went on to call Shaquille O’Neal a midget and mocked Stephen Hawking for dancing poorly. Fortunately I know very little about Nicky Hilton, but she seems like the kind of girl who in school would accidentally glue her hands to her face and then try to blame it on the hamsters. But as for Mischa, if the worst thing that can be said about her is that she’s fat, then she must be some sort of saint. Saint Fatass.