Nick Lachey is not a total whore

nlachey_turn_down.jpgDespite what happened to his marriage with Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey is apparently still into the big breasted blondes.

“Hey Nick, I’m just the opposite of Jessica. I’m tall and flat-chested and brunette. How about it?!”

So said a slightly intoxicated young lady to not-so-suddenly-single Nick Lachey of Jessica Simpson fame. Mr. Lachey was visiting friends in San Fernando Valley, Calif., when the woman, besotted by the sight of Nick poking a log in an outdoor fire pit, crept up behind him, allowed herself an indiscreet caress of his perky derriere and made her announcement.

Nick, who either doesn’t care for the “opposite of Jessica” or doesn’t care to stray indiscriminately as his cash-laden divorce proceeds, declined and left the party.

Although I don’t see how anybody could resist such a spectacular pick up line as, “I’m tall and flat-chested and brunette.” It must have taken Nick all the will power in the world to not have stripped her naked right there and started making sweet sweet love to her. If that woman wants to guarantee she gets the guy next time, she should just go with the even more effective, “I’m fat and ugly and I like to collect human hair.”

For Nick Lachey, opposite doesn’t attract at Calif. party [Baltimore Sun]