Nicole Richie was charged with a DUI today for the incident in December when she was arrested for driving the wrong way on the freeway in her SUV. The case allso alleges she had a prior misdemeanor DUI conviction in 2003 and according to Calfiornia law, if convicted of a DUI twice within 10 years a person faces a sentence of 90 days to a year in jail, a fine between $390 and $1,000, and a suspension of driving privileges.
So here’s to hoping Nicole Richie gets convicted. If prison is anything like my DVD collection has taught me, she’ll have the time of her life in there. You wouldn’t believe what those security guards do with their nightsticks during shower time. Oh, no, you would not believe. It is wonderful and arousing to say the least.
JungleRed | February 16, 2007 at 2:02 pm
She couldn’t tell she was going the wrong way with those groovy night-vision glasses?
doodee head | February 16, 2007 at 2:02 pm
She has Bette Davis eyes.
misanthrope | February 16, 2007 at 2:02 pm
So, when will welding masks catch on? She’s wearing big girls sunglasses. The prison guards are lubricating as we speak.
Italian Stallion | February 16, 2007 at 2:03 pm
Maybe someone named Laquisha will force feed her……..
judge and jury | February 16, 2007 at 2:03 pm
So she was booked for Driving Under Ideal Weight?
RichPort | February 16, 2007 at 2:05 pm
Nightsticks??? The most she could manage would be a greased toothpick.
Jack Handey | February 16, 2007 at 2:06 pm
Eight posts!
Seems like quite the busy news day for the superficial.
niner11 | February 16, 2007 at 2:07 pm
what a slut
sid | February 16, 2007 at 2:07 pm
“So here’s to hoping Nicole Richie gets convicted.”
HA!
HAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAA! Now THAT is funny!
Seriously, can you lay off with the new stories for today? One more and my song thing gets knocked off the bottom. Thanks.
Come on Superfish, you work hard; you’ve posted stories and video. You deserve a break. We’ve got enough for the weekend.
MrSemprini | February 16, 2007 at 2:08 pm
When I saw the picture, the first thought I had was that we have confirmation on the existence of alien intelligence. Then, reality hit. This is a down day…
JungleRed | February 16, 2007 at 2:09 pm
She should be charged with felony assault for subjecting us to that outfit.
biatcho | February 16, 2007 at 2:09 pm
i love it when bad things happen to fatties.
Jack Handey | February 16, 2007 at 2:10 pm
Sid, you were a minute late with your post.
Good luck with your song thing though.
jrzmommy | February 16, 2007 at 2:11 pm
#9 something tells me you’ll repost it…
JungleRed | February 16, 2007 at 2:11 pm
Is she going for the Mr. Magoo look or Hans Moleman from the Simpsons?
Smackage | February 16, 2007 at 2:12 pm
she probably won’t learn her lesson, but at least she’ll have to stop wearing those ridiculous glasses in jail.
p911gt10c | February 16, 2007 at 2:12 pm
Willy Wonka was drivin drunk?
Saera | February 16, 2007 at 2:16 pm
How many pairs of glasses does Nicole have? D:
dr phil | February 16, 2007 at 2:18 pm
All the posts are because Fish himself is worried that tonight he’ll have a very vivid dream about Harry Potter’s clenched ass.
schack | February 16, 2007 at 2:20 pm
could it be fate, the flecks in our eyes are mirror images, and when we kiss they’re perfectly aligned?
Before she goes anywhere, she’s gotta lose in weight what, for the sake of virtue, she has to gain.
Which basically means she’ll more than have disappeared, before she can safely say she’s not FAT.
Anexio | February 16, 2007 at 2:20 pm
If anybody pokes something in Nicole Richie’s nightstick hole they’re gonna pull out a stub.
There’s acid in there baby! Acid and used gum…oh and bugs. Theres bugs in there too.
schack | February 16, 2007 at 2:23 pm
that one was for you, my little unipole
dirt chicken | February 16, 2007 at 2:32 pm
There’s not a prison that can hold her. That skinny biatch can slip through the bars, and crawl thrugh a hole in the chain link. If she’s spotted all she has to do is turn sideways ! She’ll be a regular HO-dini !
Superfreek | February 16, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Oh My God, Nicole Richie may go to prison !!! Oh nevermind, she’s not thin enough to do any magazine covers anymore and her glasses are getting more ridiculous by the day…Nicole, we know it’s you ! You are the only person whose shades are bigger than the actual body :) Ta Sweety,
Erin;)
greatestntheworld | February 16, 2007 at 2:38 pm
Wow, insignificance wears owl glasses.
schack | February 16, 2007 at 2:39 pm
dirt chicken. you are too right. i bet she could swim out through the pipes, anorexic shawshank style
misanthrope | February 16, 2007 at 2:44 pm
@23… Maybe they’ll give her a Hannibal cell, without the air holes. Crap, but then there’s the drawer thingy.
Sheva | February 16, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Adds a whole new meaning to bug-eyed.
WTF is up with the ridiculous Elton John deification?
schack | February 16, 2007 at 2:55 pm
foiled again!
dirt chicken | February 16, 2007 at 3:03 pm
@ 26 Yup ! Just flush her narrow ass down the toilet, and coast through the pipes to freedom.
JadisOne | February 16, 2007 at 3:05 pm
Maybe she’ll finally pick up some weight in jail. They give you three hots and a cot.
RussianMafia | February 16, 2007 at 3:17 pm
Bug in jail.. Buzzzzzz
pekpekshorts | February 16, 2007 at 3:36 pm
she’s cute. i’d do her.
Stink | February 16, 2007 at 3:53 pm
I thought the bratty girl didn’t make it to Willy Wonka’s shrink ray…
woodhorse | February 16, 2007 at 4:10 pm
She looks like Jeff Goldblum in THE FLY. That means she’s NOT “fly”, she’s fugly.
DrunkBlogger | February 16, 2007 at 5:34 pm
Get off her jock already.
sid | February 16, 2007 at 6:48 pm
Jack Handy: Thank you.
Actually, I went and visited that thread after it got wiped off the main page, and people were still replying.
LyraBelacqua suggested humiliating myself a little and singing it to a record store. It’s a good idea.
Thanks to all who helped :)
There’s a lot of love here. I know we like to have fun with the celebs, but there’s some good folks here :)
Yay :)
fritobandito | February 16, 2007 at 7:43 pm
Give a hoot! Don’t pollute! or, Mr. Owl, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
MrSemprini | February 16, 2007 at 8:27 pm
#38 you are old! I should know…
cayana | February 16, 2007 at 8:30 pm
Omfg. That pic. I scrolled down and I was like OH! SHIT! Wtf is that? The Fly?
NotTheMomma | February 16, 2007 at 10:00 pm
are you kidding me? she won’t see a day in jail. she’ll get community service, and she’ll pay her maid to do it for her while she goes to france or something.
crazyotto | February 16, 2007 at 11:11 pm
When your just famous for being a party girl its eventualy gonna bite you in the ass,stupid bitch
licklick | February 17, 2007 at 12:10 am
Will someone please throw this skinny little slut a cheeseburger? Bitch needs to fatten up a bit!
Mick | February 17, 2007 at 7:12 am
#18
she owns over 300 pairs, I read somehwere.
I like nicole richie, I can’t really exaplin exactly why but I do. I don’t hope jailtime on anyone but she does need to get it together and stop doing harmful things to herself. She’s not as bad as she use to be at least.
Mick | February 17, 2007 at 7:12 am
She looks really good. Blonde is best on her.
Seamus Begonia Smell | February 17, 2007 at 9:30 am
Misogynist piece of trash.
DeniseG | February 17, 2007 at 2:31 pm
Man you guys are rough!
ReelWorld | February 17, 2007 at 3:21 pm
Why oh why do these tarts insist on wearing those STUPID looking sunglasses?? It makes me feel like pulling them off their makeup caked faces and forcefeeding them to her!
Lowlands | February 17, 2007 at 6:19 pm
I almost overlooked this post but finally i found it.I recommend those securityguards to take bigger nightsticks. otherwise they could grab by her by mistake in a reflex,thinking it’s their nightstick.
Lowlands | February 17, 2007 at 6:22 pm
~49~It’s ‘grab her by’.