Natalie Portman out-hots Scarlett Johansson

February 20th, 2008 // 131 Comments

Despite my unbridled fury about her meatless footwear, Natalie Portman showed Scarlett Johansson how to look classy as hell at the London premiere of their new film The Other Boleyn Girl. I assume it’s about those little cubes you use to make soup. All my culinary geeks in the house say “Ho!” Wow, I’m retarded. Anyway, here’s a bunch of pics of Natalie looking exceptionally sexy. I only added a few of Scarlett because she looks my date to junior prom – but without the moustache.

Photos: Getty Images
superficial

  1. Methos

    Both overated skinny chicks…

  2. Geoff

    Natalie by a mile…

  3. deaconjones

    Scarlett looks like shit

  4. deaconjones

    first you fucking losers. what? I’m the loser? who dat sayin dat ho?

  5. Scarlett Johansson is frumpy lately.
    Anyone can out hot her.
    But Natalie is quite gorgeous.

  6. kitty_kat

    Its true. Natalie looks so much better!

  7. Tapeworm

    Johansson has some eye-wonk going on in that first photo.

  8. deaconjones

    first you fucking losers. what? I’m the loser? who dat sayin dat ho?

  9. deaconjones

    first you fucking losers. what? I’m the loser? who dat sayin dat ho?

  10. combustion8

    **NEWSFLASH**

    scarlett johansson is very average looking.

  11. SWEET MAMA

    Scarlett O Granny

  12. SWEET MAMA

    Scarlett O Granny

  13. Tim

    Id jerk off over both their faces…

  14. Jeezy

    Does Scarlett have a weird brightly coloured tattoo on her arm or is that just some sticker or something?

  15. lidiya

    scarjo has a neat-looking tattoo, maybe.

  16. Samuel L. J.

    Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking Jews on this motherfucking site!

  17. Scarlett Johansson is frumpy lately.
    Anyone can out hot her.
    But Natalie is quite gorgeous.

  18. lipper

    I swear, I think I saw that silver dress on project runway. And it LOST!

    They DO have stylist, so why don’t they use them? Hello?

    If you are upstaged by anorexic Nat, that’s pretty bad. I like that Scarlette isn’t so skinny, but she just looks frumpy! Nat’s corset is hot, love it!

  19. coco

    probably two of the most beautiful women in Hollywood. I cant wait to see their movie.
    I especially love scarlett and think she looks stunning here and always. I wish more people could appreciate beauty when they see it.

  20. Bemused

    It’s the Harvard degree that does it: Natalie looks gorgeous and smart fun as hell while Scarlett looks as if she could use an espresso to wake up and cut down on the glazed doughnuts for her next Obama video.

  21. This is like a before and after puberty picture.

  22. deacon jones

    She looks like she dipped her head in a mound of coke, like that dude at the party in Crocodile Dundee

  23. Weird! I can’t believe Scarlett looks this bad! Drugs? Illness? Here’s a picture of her from just a few months ago and she looks HOTTTT!!! wtf happened?

  24. Harry Ballzack

    DAMN !!
    No spammers yet ?
    Who am I going to make fun of now ?
    I can’t dis either one these fine ladies……… wait …….
    Nah I got nuthin ………..

  25. moobs

    looks like a couple of elves to me.

    ooompa looompa

  26. Karen

    Wow, Natalie’s mom is holding up pretty well!

  27. Cap'n Pickles

    It’s the blonde’s dress. she usually has her titties hangin’ out. Without that, we are forced to deal with the face.

  28. Uncle Eccoli

    Fuck that elitist twat.

  29. Racer X

    Scarlett is waay better.

    /plus she has DSLs

  30. sara

    natalie looks hotter because.. she is hotter.

  31. angela

    scarlett should have done the photoshoot for marilyn monroe instead of that skank lindsay

  32. will

    I can’t believe it….no FRIST!!!! dumbfucks OR spammers….

  33. deaconjones

    i’d screw nat in the butt while scarlette played with my butthole.

  34. Shazamm

    They are both cute/pretty enough, but sickeningly overrated in the acting/ intelligence/ “importance” department. Don’t understand why everyone worships at their altars, they’re really no different than Alba or Biel or any of those other chicks. Just two mediocre actresses who think they’re shit doesn’t stink.

  35. Margot

    Hey Actress Archives-

    Fuck you. That is appalling. You are a sick little troll and I find it really irresponsible of you to post such an obscene self-portrait on the internet.

    Seriously, though, I hope you accidentally eat poop. You deserve it, you fucking sicko.

  36. Quinn

    ScarJo looks HIGH googly eyed and pale. Definately into the snort snort

  37. jamile

    Classy? Portman’s false eyelashes look like they’re about to flap away. It’s like two bats swooped in and landed on her eyelids. Nice dress color though

  38. Chauncey Gardner

    Uh, of course Portman out-hots Johansson. Portman is a hottie and Johansson is a nottie. Although if you could put Scarlett’s tits on Natalie’s chest, that would be astonishing. But, I’ll take a beautiful face and some itty-bitties over big knockers and a seahorse-face any day of the week.

  39. Auntie Kryst

    Damnit Fish, where are the pics with them kissing?

  40. Eric

    They’re just a pair of good-looking, talentless morons. Yawn.

  41. deacon jones

    @34

    Gotcha troll. Next time add the space between my name

  42. Danny McNuggets

    Wow, me, them and the best 3way ever just flashed before my eyes.

    Then I woke up and realized that the hooker I see is way hotter than them. And would cost me less over time.

  43. deacon jones

    Thanks for the tip faggot.

  44. amma

    Hmmm…yeah, Scarlett’s dress isn’t as pretty. BUT there is something about Portman that screams “crazy chick.” I dunno what it is–that on-the-verge of manic smile, that crazy grin…Mark my words, she’s gonna be in the news in the next few years for A) Stalking some guy and cutting up his clothes with scissors B) A heavy pill habit or C) Shoplifting. In the end, she’ll end up living with a bunch of cats. Scarlett will just get married and stop wearing make-up, gain a lot of weight but be happy. Mark my words.

  45. D. Richards (Hands.)

    Scarlett looks like one of those cheap sluts from a Max Hardcore movie: Cheap, cheap make-up, worthless large colored eyes with drug pupils, a less than average bone structure, and an eleven year-old male child’s figure.

    I wonder if ol’ Scar drinks piss.

  46. But if we’re posting self-portraits, I’m game – here’s mine.

  47. liz

    I think they both look really beautiful, but Scarlett has the naturally prettier face. Full stop.

  48. Sam

    I thought it was Hayden Panettiere who was friends with the dolphins?

  49. nipolian

    Slap some monster breasts on Nat and she’ll be good to go.

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