Natalie Portman is single

September 25th, 2008 // 52 Comments

Natalie Portman and folk-singer Devendra Banhart are no longer together, according to People:

Portman, 27, began dating Banhart, also 27, after starring in his “Carmensita” video, which was shot last March. A short time later, they took their romance public when they were spotting kissing on the streets of New York and over a sushi dinner at Jewel Bako.

For those of you who missed the video when I posted it back in July, I included it after the jump. Perhaps it will offer some clues as to why these two broke up. You know, besides the obvious reason. (The pubes.)


  1. pubes


  2. ph7

    Nerds love chicks like this.

    Real men don’t.

  3. Diana

    I’m first. Heh!

  4. ButtPadd

    I crap bigger than Natalie Portman!


    Kim Kardashian

  5. Diana

    Okay, I didn’t make first. I’ll trying again until I do.

  6. rumble grumble gurgle roar

    Grandma, I love you in a salad way.


  7. Conscience_Found

    Pointy faced and intense.

    not my bag, baby.

  8. Conscience_Found

    Pointy faced and intense.

    not my bag, baby.

  9. jame

    Amazine! My friends told me that she joined a hot club[__""__]a free dating for whites and blacks to find their interracial love.

  10. hef

    She sucked me dry

  11. Ferdinand Narcos

    2-ph7-It’s because you love the penis.

    This woman is smokin’.

  12. Rabbi

    he’s a Goy

  13. I'm Obama & I approve

    Sweet!! Another one hits the market.

    How do you feel about Oreos, Baby??

    After I win this thing, we can do the nasty in the Lincoln Bedroom. Michelle will be off hating America with Farrakahn, so no one will know.

    You can pull me down by my huge ears.

  14. CP

    met her and she’s a fake Hollywood bitch. no wonder she can’t keep a man to save her life… she’s an insecure pretentious brat. she should try dating a normal nice guy thats not rich and or famous… might learn something.

  15. ^1


  16. Cat

    mmm… she’s single but I wish she was gay! i would show her the ropes if she was curious mmmhmmmmm

    freakin’ HOT!!!

  17. mko

    Tiny and no womanly features.

    She’s a favorite for guys who like to masturbate to porcelain skin, apparently.

  18. Joe Cat

    Dear Natalie Portman,

    I am newly single as well.

    Send me your email and I will send you pictures.

  19. LIK

    She’s no doubt beautiful! And I love young lovely girls, I don’t really care about the social norm! sincere and sensual people on __Agelessmate.c om__ care nothing but chemistry! True love and feel right are what they really care!

  20. DJ

    who gives a shit.

  21. Bigheadmike

    She is just about perfect.
    Maybe she likes big headed guys…..

  22. lynds

    oh no, i loved them!

  23. clichewaste

    this post should be more about how Devendra Banhart is single.

  24. Poor Natalie…but its even worse now for the deluded Star Wars geeks who think they’re now back in with a shot.

  25. mamadough

    why do pedophiles like natalie portman? if you pull back her hair, it’s like fucking a 12 year old boy.

  26. Joe Cat

    Superficial Writer,

    Get that fucking stupid trippy video off of this website and replace it with this one.

    you fucking fruit.

  27. Ted Kennedy's tumor

    #26, what’s your point?

  28. hootie

    #26 how would you know what it’s like to fuck a 12 yr old boy?

  29. garamond

    Banhart, shmanhart… I’m next!

    So Nat, darling, light of my life, fire of my loins, if you’re reading this (and I bet you are), why don’t we, like, ride the arrow of time together for a wee while? I’m a kind-hearted, animal-loving, well-educated, Democrat-voting, sensible yet sensitive guy with a great sense of humor and a serious weakness for smart girls. I’m a smart fellow myself, but without a trace of arrogance, vain without being narcisstic and assertive without being obtrusive. So, once you have had enough of those pretty boys with their pretty opinions and their pretty lives, give me a call whydontcha?

  30. hootie

    #26 how would you know what it’s like to fuck a 12 yr old boy?

  31. Dr. John Thomas

    If Natalie Portman and Kiera Knightly had C Cups, they could rule the world.

  32. Marino

    she needed to upgrade anyway. just because your all indie and hipster friendly doesnt mean you have to date a hobo who likes to show his pubes.

  33. Marino

    true dat

  34. Spanky

    I would dry fuck her. The little skinny ones you can manhandle during angry sex. A good pimp slap to finish it off.

  35. Randal

    I’m sorry to learn that things did not go well between you and Banhart but love is out there for you my dear, so don’t cry for Argentina just yet.

    Your role in Paris Je T’aime is the real you, a beautiful young lady becoming herself as a woman.


  36. RogerF

    Dr. John Thomas is correct. Both Natalie and Kiera would rule if they had bosoms.

    I can’t stop watching this girl’s boobs in this DFT video:

  37. danawhite

    She is really hot,i just heard that she is hooking up with a tall basketball player on a tall dating place named: __Tallmingle.com___ ,really?

  38. tc

    Seriously disappointed at the lack of anti-semitic jokes here.

  39. Al Goldstein

    I think she’d like my non-kosher meat over his. We all know Hebrew National doesn’t plump when you cook them.

  40. Chauncey Gardner

    What’s more alarming than nerds who salivate over Portman are the ones who salivate over Ellen Page. Now, THAT looks like a boy.

  41. Chauncey Gardner


    What’s the difference between a ton of coal and a thousand Jews?

    Jews burn longer.

  42. lovecraft

    It’s nice to see ron jeremy is still getting work. His performance as rajah was the only good thing in that video.

  43. HorribleJudgment

    The broke up because she woke the fuck up. The guy has shitty fucking music, he’s a fucking fugly weirdo who’s hideous and an idiot, and she figured out she made a fucking fool out of herself in that video. That’s all there is to it. ‘Nuff said.

  44. ah

    #15 I met her and found her to be a very pleasant girl. Very shy and yes insecure. Very guarded with strangers. Maybe she saw your inner bitch and met it with hers.

  45. Yuck! Bikinis, breasts, ladies, pussy…how about some more stories of boys like Miley Cyrus’s boyfriend. We know he can’t get it up for her, as much as she wants it. She’s such a little slut!

  46. Sarah Palin

    Don’t forget, God has a powerful burner designed just for deviant sinners, the unrepentant and goofy people who follow the latest celebrity gossip.

    Let’s pray. Those of us in power at state capitals and Washington DC will work tirelessly to ensure that our uniformed servicve members are being sent to do Gods work.

    Now, let’s prey.

  47. She is my Gal… and She Belongs to Me.. but hope She feels the Same.. Also About Me….

    ROFL !!


  48. mmm...lemonheads

    She’s intelligent, and she’s hawt, and now she’s single?
    And I’m still stuck with “the stranger”. Life sucks.

  49. herbiefrog

    we love watching the truth : )

    …the truth

    [actually we can do it without the “the”


    thaere you go… [what ? ]

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