Natalie Portman gets peed on by a dog

I make it an effort to try and capture the pulse of you, my dear readers. And you came out in force today to tell me the news that is most dearest to your heart: Natalie Portman getting whizzed on by a dog. There’s numerous times I worry if I’m writing to a group of disgruntled, undersexed office workers who will one day stab me in the eye with an optical mouse (Most likely after a Heidi Montag post.). But now I know for certain that you guys are HOLY FUCKING SHIT AWESOME! Seriously, I’d marry you all if not for the whole polygamy is illegal thing. Stupid laws. Anyway, don’t change a bit.

Thanks to Roxie who immediately thought of me after seeing a pooch pee on Natalie. *sniff* I’m so damn proud…

Photo: NY Post