Miley Cyrus is a role model and other news

- Boner’s missing. [Insert Have you checked Tom Cruise? joke here.] [PopEater]

- Jon Voight might be the harbinger of a Brangelina wedding. Or he locked himself out again. It’s a toss-up. [Lainey Gossip]

- Robert Pattinson is now the world’s sparkliest and greasiest vampire. [Dlisted]

- Sophie Monk must be dating Chris Brown. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

- Rihanna getting a lap dance from a midget. Really not much else to say here. [Huffington Post]

- Scott Disick in the Most Accurate Movie Comparison Known to Man. [TheFABlife]

- Jonathan Rhys Meyers still staring like a fucking axe murderer. [Just Jared]

- Billy Corgan won’t even marry Jessica Simpson. [PopSugar]

- Hayden Panettiere really wants me to love her again. [Celebslam]

- Jay-Z and Governor Paterson are under federal investigation. [Bossip]

- Travis Barker escaped death to get into bullshit fights with the paparazzi. Good save, God. [Amy Grindhouse]

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