Hey, Miley Cyrus’ Vagina, Long Time, No See

The 2013 MTV EMAs were held in Amsterdam last night, so here’s Miley Cyrus smoking weed, the burnout restaurant employee drug of choice, on stage after bringing back the Vagina Melvin (I’m treating it like a celebrity now.) for her performance because somewhere in her publicist’s office sits a Post-It note that reads, “Labia Every 4 Wks!!” And next to that note sits a computer with a spreadsheet created by a college graduate who had to calculate out how many iTunes downloads each lip generated and whether shorn-ness was a factor. He would die by his own hand over Christmas.

Photos: Getty, WENN