[Above: Skynet version slated for 2020 release.]
By popular demand, here’s the new Miley Cyrus sex doll with it’s not-at-all-creepy-product-name “Finally Mylie!” According to The Sun, it sold out within 48 hours of going on sale, so I believe I speak for a deeply concerned America when I say, “They’re all in Billy Ray’s End Times Bunker* next to the Corn Pops and taco mix. We attack at dawn.”
*Not a joke. This actually exists.
Photos: Splash News
































Eh i’d hit it for a goof. in the ass
Does the deluxe version come with posable vagina-diddle grip?
**waits with bated breath**
So no one No one Knows the Name of the girl on the cover of the Box?????
Sex Dolls usually Get Porn Stars to do the pics for the boxes, The Kim Kardashian had Lela Star n the cover,
I really really really really Wish to know the name of the girl in the cover of the box?
anyone?
if someone Figures it out that person would be the most amazing person Ever!
WHO is the girl on the Cover???
I was so distracted by her attempting to get “YOUR Mic” in achey love hole #1, I nearly overlooked the smaller shot of her cramming it into achey love hole #2.
For those who need more detailed directions to Achey Love Hole #2.
Hahaha!
Why she some ho, eh?
Look, Daddy! I’m a whore just like you always wanted!
Interesting. She looks pretty good here, and I rarely think that.
I was thinking the same thing. In fact, looks HOT here.
But once she said anything that voice would ruin the moment – now if you GAGGED her ….
This doll could be a nicotine patch for those seeking abstinence.
I’ll buy one if it comes with her assistant in a 2-for-1 special.
It would take at least a 2fer!!!
She ain’t gorgeous, but she knows how to satisfy a penis
thousends of PAEDOPHILES are pretty happy with that.
SO WE MUST THANK MILEY FOR THAT!!
It would have really sold if it looked like the picture above without the shorts.
Printing this picture out right now for later use.
Miley Virus was never this sexy.
Lawsuit gonna lose – there’s no likeness but the names.
A Miley-like voice keeps talking until you put your ___ in a love hole.
Hit the right rhythm and she sings.
Gotta make all 3 love holes achey to get her to STFU.
Notice they never show the doll? I’m convinced they all look exactly like the classic sex doll you see on T.V. except for maybe a tacky cowboy hat and brunette wig.
the doll’s sexier than the frog lady!
And for that realistic effect – corn silk pubic hair!
My gramms has those same knickers.
Man I just…I…I don’t have the words. WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THIS FIRST???
It’s not a doll. It’s actually Miley. I hear she’s making housecalls if you over her some booze and/or salvia.
Oops, offer* her . . . . .
Oh my! What is the interpretation for this pose?
This is a travesty. What is wrong with you people? No matter how misguided, Miley is a CHILD! This is DISGUSTING!!!
Uh, sorry but no. She is legally an adult. Yes, she is misguided. Yes, making money off of someone else’s likeness is a nasty business. And yes, the idea is creepy. But she is an adult now and has been sexualizing her own image for the last couple of years, so she has no leg to stand on with the “damaging her image” arguement.
get a grip. Shes just telling the truth. That’s her money spot.
This is absolutely disgusting! For crying out loud, Miley is just a child!
Umm she is 18, that’s not a child
Yeah you stupid whore.
Act like a slut. Dress like a slut. Get treated like a slut. Oh well.
SEX DOLL???? Can ya do somethin’ ’bout those itsy bitsy, teeny weeny, breasts that can be covered by yellow polka dots???hahahahaha
I’d like to see an “Emily Osment Doll”!
Please, I named my right hand Handa Fucktanna years ago.
HAHA hilarious!
Look, if she was standing in front of her, stooped over a stool, and you were doing her from behind you can’t tell me it wouldn’t make the most delightful ‘slup, slup, slup’ sound.
Miley looks like an Oregon stripper now.
I’ll take twenty of em.
Wow, Miley, are you that desperate for attention? somebody get this kid to a therapist, stat!
Okay thank you…she’ll be n rehab by the age of twenty-one
if you belive for one second that she had anything to do with marketing this sex doll, then I have a bridge I’d like to sell you…
yeah well now all the lazy couch potatoes who won’t get off the couch and find a job will have another lazy excuse for entertainment.
Thats so disrespectful Id damm sure sue som1 over dat and its innapropiate cuz of her fans
Is anyone else disturbed that the “achey love holes” is an obvious Billy Ray-Cyrus reference?
And… where do we buy one of these ? O.o
The cross on her necklace is sideways, obviously trying to turn itself upside down.
In reference to the lead photo….
Miley has never looked so good unless you factor in all the times she gave the “F me eyes look” to whomever was about to mount her.
Mmm, hillbilly chicks!
Yeah, it’s called Miley Cyrus.
ouch, your doll is hotter than you!
…she is going to be the next lindsy lohan
Someone finally finds Miley attractive and uses her as a sex toy??? Ha! what a joke!
This is wrong. I’m sorry, I’m all about human rights.
Sex dolls?
Go for it baby.
Sex dolls in the likeness of an under-age girl?
No. Even if product-makers insist that the doll is modeled after an of-age female, it cannot change the societal understanding that this ‘doll’ is ‘under-age’
Neutral sex dolls of women aren’t my problem, sex dolls modeled after consenting women are also perfectly acceptable.
For a female that is un-consenting, harnessing her likeness for the sexual fulfillment of whomsoever should please, most especially for their profit, is a Human Rights Violation. Sorry to bring it there, but… yeah.
she is so hot now :-)
Miley at 17…”You pervos!”
Miley at 18……”Oh yea I’d Hit that stuff!”
Ha, are you serious? A young sex doll? If so, there’s quite too many thousands of rumors out there are being a bit too much of there selves
I’m not even a very religious person but she is wearing a religious cross on her necklace! Hannah Montana=whore/jail bait