Miley Cyrus Is Single Again
Patrick Schwarzenegger is the rich, 21-year-old son of a famous Hollywood actor which naturally resulted in him being constantly surrounded by pussy, and Miley Cyrus is, well, Miley Cyrus. So the fact that these two even made it this long is really not that surprising because there’s no way she doesn’t do a bunch of freaky shit. I’m talking shit that Patrick Schwarzenegger will probably never, ever experience again in his life, and he’ll spend the rest of his days wondering if that’s a good or a bad thing before eventually funneling all of his frustration into a blog about celebrity tits if we’re just spit-balling here. Anyway, PEOPLE reports:
Miley Cyrus and Patrick Schwarzenegger appeared to be mending their relationship after going through a tough time last month, but a source confirms to PEOPLE the couple have broken up.
“It’s not a break,” says a source close to the couple. “It’s done.”
Of course, the thing to do right now is blame Justin Bieber for every breakup that comes down the line which in this case is actually true because he’s the one who ruined the relationship with his flagrant nipple photos and dreams of blowing Elvis. For the last time, the man’s dead, and someone already tried to steal his body once. It’s guarded now. You’ll never make it in.