Miley Cyrus is Totes Single This Time, You Guys. Totes Single.

November 5th, 2010 // 66 Comments

Seen here in Madrid today, Miley Cyrus has been coping with more than just the aftermath of Bret Michaels’ penis. She broke up with Liam Hemsworth again, according to People:

Miley, who turns 18 on Nov. 23, is no longer dating her Last Song costar Liam Hemsworth, 20, according to a source. “Their on- and off-again relationship is currently off,” says the source. “But you never know with Miley and Liam. They could be back on at some point.”
Adds another source close to Hemsworth: “There was no drama. The relationship just ran its course. They were good friends first and remain friends.”

Eh. I’m sure these two will work it out and/or start sexting other people while bullying gays. (I can’t keep up with these kids and their fads.) So let’s focus on the real issue here: The goddamn bindi. Is she trying to make the Baby Jesus cry with that thing? Because I don’t think she realizes its significance to the Hindu religion. Plus she’s from the south where I’m almost positive wearing this has to be tantamount to building a terror mosque inside Cracker Barrel. “Ain’t nothin’ sacreds, no mo’?” her kin will wonder as others determine if they mean Miley or the limit on biscuit refills. It’ll be hard to be certain.

Photos: Splash News


  1. JD

    I think that thing on her forehead is a nail.

  2. what does “totes single” mean? is that some slang the kids are using? Or is it crack smoke induced gibberish?

  3. The Real First (above is a liar)

    Wow can you imagine how ugly this trash bucket is gonna be in 10 years?


      Maybe, Jocelyn Wildenstern level?

    • mick

      Dude, she’s ugly NOW – and, from the looks of it, is eating waaaaay too many bicuits with butter, jam and cheese on top. Put an apple in her mouth and serve up for Thanksgiving.

    • Nick

      She’s already ugly… Britney still has a better face even though she’s older, though Miley has a hotter bod

  4. the rest of us

    For those of us who live outside the basin; what the eff is “Totes Single”, and where the hell did that come from?

  5. Frobz

    We can all thank Gwen Stefani for starting this “white girl wearing a bindi” trend.

    Outside of the reality manufacturing warehouses of Disney, this trailer trash is on a crash-course with disaster.

  6. Totes as in she totally cant wait to fuck my brains out in 18 days, and decided rather than twotime dickface she dumped him. Considerate really, considering shes half Tish..

  7. burton


  8. GravyLeg

    So funny… Does she really think she is gonna pull purchases from the 15-25 crowd? I would have bought my kids another Hannah album… Done with her now though….

  9. She’s definitely got a harelip or something. a normal person’s upper lip covered their teeth, it doesn’t stop at the gum line.

    I don’t think there are ANY photos of her with her lips touching, I don’t think she can do it.

  10. OJ's Mom

    That face. That goddamn face. I want to cross it with a baseball bat soooo badly.

  11. GravyLeg

    Totes = Totally

  12. Miley

    What’s up, doc?

  13. herbiefrog

    hey miles…

    check out your staus with our linds…


    [what ?

  14. markonius maximus

    What is the obsession with this lame?
    Her eyes are too close together and is flat out ugly – Who gives a fuck?

  15. Lima Zulu

    Terror mosque inside a Cracker Barrel. That filled me with laughter and hunger. AT THE SAME TIME

  16. Miley Cyrus Madrid
    Commented on this photo:

    The crowd want to see the tits, but all they get is the teeth.

  17. Vandal

    Goofy bitch.

  18. Spense

    releases = realizes. Jesus, proofread this shit Fish

  19. Spense

    I dont know how anyone thinks Miley is ugly. Dumb as a stump and full of herself maybe, but she’s actually pretty hot.

    • Nick

      She’s average by normal human standards, but 6 feet under by celeb standards. Just compare her to BritBrit at the same age. Exactly

  20. elephantman

    shes a pig

  21. Miley Cyrus Madrid
    Mel Gibson's Shrink
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she has had work done on her face already. She looks weird.

  22. Gary B

    Is it me me or does t seem like Miley is putting up with far more shit that Demi right now. Divorce, Brett Michaels and her Mom (gross). Some at teh rehab center is probably telling Demi right now, at least you didn’t found out your mom was screwing Brett Michaels.

  23. Miley Cyrus Madrid
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus Christ is she ugly.

  24. Deacon Jones

    Hmm..Nov 23rd….so you’re telling me in 2 weeks I can admi to jerking off to her? My lips are shut till then

  25. Ash Bones

    I wonder what nude body part will be first exposed after the 23rd……Full side boob with nipple, upskirt snatch shot, or just a thong rearview??

  26. the rest of us

    And to think I wasted all that time in school learning proper diction

  27. Miley Cyrus Madrid
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF is that on her forehead?

  28. kiran

    The bindi has no significance to the hindu religion, it’s like a bangle, everyone wears (or not) one in India and no one gives a shit if someone else wearns one (or not).

    What is significant is the laltika, which is a red colored bindi, signifying married status (like a ring). It’s also worn by priests and the laltika, like the holy swastika, is religious in nature.

    No one really cares about that anyway, and married women really only wear it for formal occasions.

    Take a walk around Delhi and you’ll see what I mean. I know, I’m from there…

  29. friendlystoner

    i`m so glad i`m from england cos tht makes her legal since she was 16 (dont lie and say you wouldnt)

  30. wim

    ……but she just fled out of kindergarten.

  31. Look at that face, you can tell she’s gonna be soo fat someday. My prediction: she and Jessica Simpson will be shopping together within 5 years.

  32. kara

    why does her face always look like she just accidentally ran into a sliding glass door? it’s like, surprise mixed with smash.

  33. myah

    uhhh bindi’s don’t actually mean much. culturally, any gal can wear them. i guess it could cause a problem in nashville, though, no idea. a lot of things miley’s been doing lately would cause problems there too though.

  34. Miley Cyrus Madrid
    Commented on this photo:

    What the hell is she doing to her face? She seems so wrong, so swollen up.
    Is she doing botox already? I hope so, we need more trashy non talented freaks to entertain us with their underage surgery, drugs, orgies with german shepherds.

  35. AJ

    I think she just want to get banged by some other blind man she’s gotten invite for her birthday! WHAT A WHORE!

  36. thebitchisback

    coke bloat

  37. wim

    she is starting to look like a true FAT & LAZY american.

  38. Heyzeus Hosay

    Oh shit, Cracker Barrel has a mosque? WTF is happening to my proud country? Fuckin’ Islamic Hindus…

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