And Now Back To ‘A Vadgity Chipmunk Christmas’

December 12th, 2013 // 28 Comments

Things got a tad divisive earlier, so here’s Miley Cyrus reminding us what the season is really about: Staring at a 21-year-old’s labia while she smacks a midget’s ass. Which sounds unseemly when I say it, so here’s how Charles Dickens originally described it:

Shaving was not an easy task, for his hand continued to shake very much; and shaving requires attention, even when you don’t dance while you are at it. But if he had cut the end of his nose off, he would have put a piece of sticking-plaister over it, and been quite satisfied.

See? An entire passage about shaving a dancing vagina for the yuletide. By gum, you can practically smell the Christmas goose just reading it. Tell us more of figgy twerks, Master Dickens!

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Getty

superficial

  1. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Commented on this photo:

    I am way too high for this photo

  2. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Megyn Kelly
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t care what anyone says. Miley Cyrus is white.

  3. Brown bagged alcohol, a creepy Santa, a 21 year old with daddy issues and a midget. Sounds like every Christmas of my adult life

  4. Staring at a 21 year old’s labia while she smacks a midget’s ass would be the best Christmas ever imo.

  5. she thinks she’s the first person in history to have a female body.

    • If she was the first woman born or the only woman left, that still would not be true. Jennifer Lawrence has a female body, Miley, not so much.

  6. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    xxx is the universal symbol for poison right?

  7. Miley confuses my penis. She’s a fit 21 year old girl trying to buy her way into notoriety with over expressed sexuality…yet I’m just not interested. Trying too hard to be sexy is somehow just not sexy.

  8. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    If the other woman had any sense of humor, she’d have chowed down on burritos an hour before the performance.

  9. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I am still waiting for the embarrassing webcam masturbation video to leak.

  10. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    This pic makes it look like she’s laying on the road after being hit by a car.

  11. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s just prudent planning for Chippendale’s to start a boys’ choir.

  12. I got yer war on Christmas right here.

  13. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve never seen so many leotards since 1983 and the Jane Fonda days…and I’m not liking it Miley and Selena, I’m not liking it at all…

  14. “Buzzworthy” has been stuck for a week on a picture of Miley with a dazed look on her face, a hairstyle that makes her look even more androgynous than usual, and one exposed breast smashed under plastic. It looks like a kidnapper’s ransom photo, and it creeps me out every time I see it; and that’s when it hit me, that somewhere out there there’s a bisexual pedophile who’s finally found perfection: a woman who looks like a twelve year old boy with a vagina and small breasts.

  15. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Commented on this photo:

    Miley’s pudenda hours of hard labia required to present an act of this caliber for all those pre-teens at the Jingle Ball!

  16. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Commented on this photo:

    Why can’t Terry Richardson just take of snaps of her in some stirrups and get it over with?

  17. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    bernard
    Commented on this photo:

    just how daddy likes it -
    under the sheet beej

  18. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Hillary?

  19. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Phoenix
    Commented on this photo:

    That poor drummer thought the grunge craze would never end. And now look at him.

  20. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Phoenix
    Commented on this photo:

    Bored guitarist hates himself.

  21. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Phoenix
    Commented on this photo:

    This drag queen can tuck like the best of them.

  22. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Phoenix
    Commented on this photo:

    “That thing is level with my face. The least you can do is douche.”

    “Watch your mouth. Wonka’s still got plenty just like you at the factory, just begging for a way out.”

  23. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Phoenix
    Commented on this photo:

    The guitarists are giving each other the sign for their previously discussed suicide pact.

  24. Miley Cyrus Cameltoe Vagina Diddle Humping Santa Clause Power 96 1 Jingle Ball 2013
    Phoenix
    Commented on this photo:

    “…short and stout.”

  25. PassingTrue

    And now for a special Lifetime presentation of “The Ginch that Stole Christmas…”

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