While being interviewed in Vegas yesterday, Mila Kunis denied dating Ashton Kutcher despite these photos of just the two of them on a three-day weekend trip to Carpinteria, Ca. where she waved her awesome ass in yoga pants right in front of him because friends do that. Extra reports:
“It’s absurd!” said Mila. “A friend is a friend.”
Listen, Mila Kunis, I’m going to be straight with you. There’s nothing I want more in this life than to believe Ashton Kutcher’s penis has never once entered your vagina. I would perform unspeakable acts to make that a reality. Unspeakable acts. Unfortunately, here are the facts:
1. I’m looking directly at you and Ashton Kutcher escaping to a quiet little California town for three days together where your ass looks awesome.
2. You admitted to being blind the entire time you were having sex with Macaulay Culkin and I’m sure it’s taken a while for that shock to wear off. Which leads me to…
3. As much as I hate Ashton Kutcher, he’s in remarkable shape and not at all built like Macaulay Culkin who’s appearance you finally saw then promptly dumped because apparently your sense of touch is shithouse and lacked the skills to go, “No, wait, ABORT!”
All that said, most people think of you as the chick who ate Natalie Portman’s vagina probably one of the most awesome, down to earth actresses in Hollywood, so the easy way to clear this up is to admit you spent an entire weekend waving your just, god, so awesome, ass in front of Ashton Kutcher’s face while going, “You’ll never get this, you’ll never get this.” Which, yes, sounds a tad Bieber-ish, and might not be what the Internet wants, but it’s what the Internet needs right now. Be our Dark Knight, Mila. Our awesome, awesome ass Dark Knight.
Photos: Keola Media/Dean/Bryan/NPG.com
Have you been working out Mila? Or being “friends” with Ashton doing your bootie really good? Whatever it is keep it up!
Saying “it was just sex, not a relationship” isn’t helping your case, Mila.
Oh and yeah, we know what kind of “friends” THEY are!… I saw your documentary bitch!
Wow, she must have gotten butt implants because she had an ironing board in Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I want to bake a pie out of that ass!!
Butt implants when done tastefully like this are OK in my book.
And Fish summed it up perfectly about how most of us feel about this situation.
I just hope Ashton is in front when they do it doggy-style.
When did they start making yoga pants with padding?
I’d like to fill them with pudding.
Ridiculous. The media have a lot of growing up to do. She should have a talk with the warden about this. Ridiculous. *shaking head* Ridiculous.
NORM! I love that movie! They should make Norm MacDonald make more movies. I’ll watch them I swear.
i think she just gained weight. In some other recent pic she looked kind of chubby
Telegram from 2005: Trucker hats are “in”
I’d friend that ass for days at a time too.
Of course she isn’t dating Ashton Douchebag. How ridiculous for a girl like that, hot as a pistol, to be DATING a cougar’s chewed up reject boy toy.
She FUCKING him. It’s like physical therapy. Can’t let the fuck muscles lose their tone. But it’s not dating.
Awesome “fuck friend” gifts Ashton! I guess she’s a cheap lay.
c’mon Ashton was banging her back in the “that 70′s show days”. It’s ridiculous to think that he would go back to something he already hit, unless of course Macaulay Culkin had magic wand that he used to reupholster that.
this kinda denial is your standard Hollywood bullshit for publicity thing. once it gets boring they will break up or call it official.
looks like celluiltis…
“a friend is a friend” (with benefits, right???).
Oh my god that ass. Doggy style everyday.
I would wreck that ass. I don’t care how difficult her brown is.
#1 reason she’s been working on that ass? She lost JT to Shelfie
If they aren’t dating, she’s taking playing hard to get to a whole new level. ;)
EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW BARF if i was to date her after i make her dushe herself with chlorine
I love how no one can walk outside with the opposite sex anymore. Guess I shouldn’t hang with my dude friends for fear of people starting shit. How do people even know what went on with them other than a handful of pics out in public when they *know* the cameras are watching? Nobody but them knows what happended. And even if they are screwing, who cares? They’re grown ass adults and shouldn’t have to “admit” anything to anybody. It isn’t the media’s business to know who’s fucking who.
Oh, and that Culkin kid was obviously doing something right to have dated her for eight years and lived with her for most of that time. I love how jealous some people can get just because he doesn’t look to be up to Mila’s standards. Pretty clear looks didn’t mean shit to her. Some people really need to get over that, especially since who Mila decides to be with has no bearing on you what so ever since you don’t, and probably will never, know her.
hm..after looking at this picture I suddenly know what I want for dinner. Is that wierd?
I want to put my tongue so far up here butthole. That would be great!
He’s in the Bigfoot pose.
If that is as good as her ass looks in the magic that is yoga pants, y’all would be severely disappointed when she takes them off.
Oh the joy that is hormonal teenage boys with an internet connection.
Having racked up a lot of gym time – I agree. Mila pulls those yoga pants off and her butt’s going to drop about six saggy inches (implants or not). She reads as “thin” not “in shape”. Two completely different things.
And, the boy language doesn’t read “intimate” to me – too much space between them…but there goes the teenager thing again too.
big feet for such tiny legs!
Jesus Christ, that guy is such a Donkey’s Dick.
she has a perfect butt:)
Jesus, fattie, put down the cheeseburgers! Amirite?
Seriously, if calling this bitch fat doesn’t turn every girl under 30 into a bulimic mess, nothing will.
Ya’ll are making such a fuss over her booty so I click the pics to see what all the buzz is about…. Is it just me or does her ass look lumpy? It looks like she did a shitty (no pun intended) cheap stuffing job. It looks like there is a balled-up paper towel or towels/TP almost at the center of both of her (ass) cheeks. It looks weird. Other than that, I’d agree with all of you, but no ass should appear lumpy (especially in tight ass yoga pants that pull your cheeks up/smooth ‘em out.
Ya’ll are making such a fuss over her booty so I click the pics to see what all the buzz is about…. Is it just me or does her ass look lumpy? It looks like she did a shitty (no pun intended) cheap stuffing job. It looks like there is a balled-up paper towel or towels/TP almost at the center of both of her (ass) cheeks. It looks weird. Other than that, I’d agree with all of you, but no ass should appear lumpy (especially in tight ass yoga pants that pull your cheeks up/smooth ‘em out.
nice hammies
Oh my goodness, No Aston no! I’m cricnakg up right now! You are too funny and BAD for posting this. lmao! I got it this time but only because you made me look twice. Sort of like what Aston Kutcher did. Did he look away when she turned around.(smiling) That’s terrible & funny at the same time.