Somehow back in April I completely missed Mike Tyson sharing an amusing anecdote about the time he caught Brad Pitt “boning” Robin Givens (Fun Fact: Mike Tyson likes to say “boning.”) while they were going through a divorce. Turns out the Champ and Robin were still hooking up despite their marriage falling apart because Mike Tyson can knock a man out with one punch and has no qualms hitting women which is how I explained it to myself, so here he is on “In Depth with Graham Bensinger” (video above) retelling what, by all rights, should’ve been the beginning of a police report that ends with the words, “And then victim’s head emerged from the wormhole, punched beyond all recognition.” Via HuffPost Celebrity:
“I hope Brad don’t think I’m mad at him. I’m not mad at this guy, no way,” Tyson said, referring to the 1980s tryst.
Tyson explained that while he and Givens were tending to divorce proceedings in 1988, they would still have sex. “I was getting a divorce. I was going to my lawyer’s office to divorce her that day but I wanted to sneak in a quickie.” Apparently, Givens was also spending time with Pitt. “This particular day, someone beat me to the punch,” Tyson told Bensinger. “I guess Brad got there earlier than I did. I was mad as hell. You should’ve saw his face when he saw me.”
I like how Mike Tyson, a goddamn destroyer of worlds, is worried about offending the spokesmodel for Chanel No. 5 who he originally referred to as a hooker. I mentioned that part, right?
“One day, I’m going to her house to bone her again and no one’s home, and I’m leaving and she’s pulling up with Brad Pitt, and I’m sad,” he said. At the time, Tyson did not recognize the superstar actor. “He wasn’t Brad Pitt back then. He was just some little beach-bum-looking dude. ‘Hey dude’ kind of guy. He was probably selling his body for money or something, I don’t know. He was very pretty.“
“I wasn’t thinking about attacking him,” Tyson told Global Grind. “I was just depressed I couldn’t bone her no more.”
“I wasn’t angwy or nuthin’. It’s just dat when I can’t bone nobody, it’s make teahs come outta eyes, Gwaham. It’s vewy depwessin’ to my soul. I’ll never be dat pwetty, you know what I’m sayin’? *sniff* And dose bootaful eyes…”