And Now A Moment For Mike Tyson’s Political Opinions

“Pleathe tell Lamar I thaid get well thoon. Outh! You pinthin’ me, Kloethee.”

Because you guys come here specifically for politics and not to look at a pornstar pretending her vagina fell out in the Walmart parking lot, here’s TMZ asking Mike Tyson about the presidential election. It’s a short video, and worth 27 seconds of your time.

You got all that, right? Because there was a lot going on in that less than half a minute. For starters, Mike Tyson has no fucking clue who Bernie Sanders is. Second, “the finals?” This man seems to be under the impression that there’s a basketball tournament going on. Also, what kind of bachelor party limo did he climb into at the end? Does he always exit the airport like he’s headed to Tijuana to buy a blowjob for his buddy? I like to believe he does. I also like to believe the people who eplain the real world to Mike Tyson have to use basic sports metaphors before he gets angry and starts hitting stuff.

“Okay Mike, the doctor’s says it’s benign, but he said you might want to get a second opinion.”
“Denied? Who’th he to deny me?”
“No, Mike! It’s like reviewing the play in the boo–AARGH!! *gets skull crushed*

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