Michelle Williams dating director Spike Jonze

Michelle Williams is dating director Spike Jonze. Spike is the director of the upcoming film Where the Wild Things Are and is currently getting his nuts kicked in for having the audacity to make a kid’s movie devoid of fart jokes. But at least he gets to have sex with someone who will constantly compare him to Heath Ledger. Wow, I really suck at cheering people up. Star reports:

“Michelle kissed Spike with a closed mouth on the corner of his lips,” says an eyewitness who saw the couple together the morning of July 2 leaving Spike’s Manhattan apartment. “There was definitely a little bit of caressing going on. She was clutching his arm. The body language was very romantic.”

Okay, I’m willing to believe Michelle Williams is dating Spike Jonze. They’re both weird; it works. But here’s where Star lost me: “Michelle kissed Spike with a closed mouth on the corner of his lips.” Who the hell talks like that? May I suggest a more believable dialog: “Tipping his top hat towards the lady, he offered his hand, and together they hailed a horseless carriage. Perhaps a promenade at the tavern would find this evening well. Afterward, sir and madam retired to their quarters for carnal pleasures punctuated with scones and haberdashery.” It’s almost like you’re there!