Michael Phelps & Subway stay toasty

Tony the Tiger may be a child-molesting NARC (Why’s he always at kids sports game?), but Jared and the folks at Subway understand that sometimes Americans get drunk and say “Yeah, I’ll hit that.” They’re standing behind gold-medalist Michael Phelps after he became a media lightning rod when a photo of him smoking a bong at a college party was published in the British tabloids. USA Today reports:

“Like most Americans, and like Michael Phelps himself, we were disappointed in his behavior,” Subway said in a statement. “Also like most Americans, we accept his apology. Moving forward, he remains in our plans.”
Political campaigns and corporate marketers often wait until Friday night to release bad news. But in this case, Subway waited till the end of the week to support the Olympic swimmer.

On a sadder note, my condolences to Subway employees who are about to experience an influx of hippies trying to barter for sandwiches with hacky sacks or a sweet guitar jam. Fortunately, I know their weakness: Tell them you’re hiring.