Michael Phelps: Olympic stoner

February 1st, 2009 // 187 Comments

Olympic gold medalists Michael Phelps might have just smoked his way out of the 2012 Olympics after a photo of him hitting the bong surfaced in News of the World. It was taken in November when Michael stopped by the University of South Carolina at Columbia to visit a girl he was “secretly seeing.” After presumably having his way with her, he showed up at a house party with a bunch of random chicks and drank his face off. USA!:

“He arrived with a group of girls hanging all over him. Jaws hit the floor when he walked in. You don’t get many celebrities in Columbia, so when Phelps comes to your party it’s a very big deal.
“He didn’t know many people so you’d think he’d be a little shy. But he was loud, obnoxious and slamming beers from the get-go. Every girl wanted a piece of him and every guy wanted to be his best buddy. He couldn’t get enough of all the attention.”
As he basked in his hero status, Phelps knocked back beers and shots of spirits. And when a student offered him the glass bong engraved with red writing, he did not hesitate, says our source.

Because he’s an idiot, Michael Phelps admitted it’s him in the picture and released the following statement to the AP today:

“I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment. I’m 23 years old and despite the successes I’ve had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again.”

If Michael Phelps wants to pour alcohol into his face, smoke the marijuana like a cigarette and fornicate with various loose women before beating the world’s pants off at swimming, shouldn’t we as a nation stand behind him? I mean, Christ, if he was anymore American, he’d be out fighting crime with a talking bald eagle for a sidekick. But then how would other nations know we dominate at the breast stroke? You gotta think these things through.

superficial

  1. Culchah Vulchah

    U – S – A !!!!

  2. Guest

    I HATE michael phelps!
    When he won he was sooo
    egotistic. Everybody needs
    to get over him.

  3. Guest

    I HATE michael phelps!
    When he won he was sooo
    egotistic. Everybody needs
    to get over him.

  4. Guest

    I HATE michael phelps!
    When he won he was sooo
    egotistic. Everybody needs
    to get over him.

  5. Anexio

    Whats he apologizing for? If its for smoking some weed and bangin’ some super fine Gamecock tail then he’s nothing but a pussy with freakishly long arms.

    If on the other hand he’s apologizing for only taking one bong hit when he should have had ten and corkscrewing one babe instead of 20, then he has my support.

    We all make mistakes.

  6. Phil

    Who wrote this? It’s not Fish-like. “You gotta think this things through?” WTF?

  7. Guest

    I’m a douche because I triple post.

    Im sorry everyone, I guess I haven’t really come to grips, so to speak, in regards to my super small penis.

    I cry every night.

  8. Guest

    sorry about the triple post. . . .
    I still hate michael
    and this just shows
    how STUPID AMERICANS
    are. .. . . …

  9. Camdizzle

    Honestly…who really gives a shit? He’s a 23-year-old Olympian having a good time, not a politician.

  10. D4P

    “smoke the marijuana like a cigarette”

    Maybe the photo is of the other (George) Michael Phelps: you know, the singer-songwriter…

  11. Sgt.Sweetchuck

    The only people embarrassed should be the 8 other competitors he owned at the Olympics.

  12. chris

    who cares? why is the media trying to take down someone who has inspired millions? i think that’s pretty shitty. i think we can all agree a little pot isn’t the worst thing on earth.

  13. Megan

    It looks more like Jason Whaler to me… Just sayin..

  14. Dr McNasty

    The only person who should be in trouble for this is the person who leaked this picture to the news. 25 years to life for the attempted defamation of someone whose life PWNS yours, any way you look at it.

    Also, is anyone really surprised? Win yourself 14 Olympic medals, and that earns you the right to do what the hell you want, as far as I’m concerned.

  15. jacques quenouilles

    shit, Michael IS a human being?!

  16. Guest

    @13

    HOW, exactly, has this bastard
    inspired millions?

  17. dude_on

    OOoooohhh a bong hit… he’s like fricken public enemy number one. He’s definitely on a path to shoot heroin. Hopefully someone can save him before he gets stoned repeatedly and bangs hot women.

  18. Not-A-Crime

    Hey you know what, FUCK IT! He is 23 years old and yea you can not tell me that any popular celeb or famous actor has not touched the cheba or drink their faces off.

    He did what over 2/3rds of the college students do. He lost his inhabitation got drunk said fuck it what is a little weed going to do, and smoked up.

    I feel too many weak simple minded people put too much of their faith in those who actually go out and make something of themselves. “THEY NEED TO MAKE AN EXAMPLE FOR OUR CHILDREN” people say. Why, because your dumb ass hasn’t the ability to do so, or because you’re having too much fun being a worthless role model so you want someone to do it for you?

    Good for you Mike, have fun while you’re young. You are rich and you’ve proven your worth to us, nothing more we can or should ask from you.

  19. cdisjods

    seriously? this is ridiculous. the guy takes one bong rip at a party and suddenly he’s the anti-christ. the guy could be binge drinking every night, and if he weren’t driving around or acting like a complete moron, everything would be perfectly fine in the eyes of the media. our priorities are absolutely screwed.

  20. at least he admitted that he was in the picture. if he tried to deny it that would have been stupid.

    http://www.provocativeremarks.com

  21. David

    But of course since he’s a celebrity, he will get in no trouble whatsoever.

  22. jc

    Why is Michael apologizing?

    The guy has probably spent the last twenty years of his life in a pool. It’s time to party!!! Leave the guy alone!

    If I were him, I wouldn’t even do the next Olympics. Screw it! Keep partying!!! Life is too short to have to apologize for using a bong at age 23!!!

  23. boo

    I read somewhere that he was bullied horribly in high school, so yeah, it probably felt good to be the most popular guy in the room. But still, someone decided to take a picture of him partying and release it, so he kind of got screwed over anyway.

  24. DrainBamaged

    Who the hell cares, he’s been made to be part fish for most of his life. He worked his ass off, made history. He’s got nothing left to prove, it’s time for him to enjoy life. Go for it.

  25. Phichael Melps (formerly Delgo)

    FAKE!!!
    Total Frodoshop. LOTR style.

  26. me

    Anyone posting after me sucks on Michael Phelps’ bong and swallows his poolwater

  27. Karma

    The reason he’s stupid and the reason he’s apologizing is because he might get banned from the next Olympics (London 2012) for this. Think of what he’s putting on the line: all the millions he’s been paid in sponsorship, the hardwork of his coaches/team, and fans who will be disappointed. If he doesn’t participate in 2012, he might be too old to be a top competitor in 2016.

  28. click my link please….pretty please….i beg you.

    http://ihatekaty.com/?id=1488224#6dzz5z54fsdq7ez78z8d

  29. Conky

    Big stupid mongoloid stoner.

  30. Delgo

    Thats not Michael Phelps.
    Its my roomate Spencer.
    Y’all are so gullible.

    GO TROJANS!!!

  31. Buzzzz

    He. Did. Not. Inhale. !!!

  32. mimi

    I don’t think… puff…puff… it’s a big deal… exhale.

  33. Lily

    To the person who leaked this pic: you must feel very proud of yourself now, right? Loser.
    He’s still MP and he owns you.

  34. who cares

    the guy is freaking human. it’s unbelievable how we chastise people for stuff that most of us have probably tried once in our lives. and if women want to throw themselves at him and guys want to be his bff, so what? it doesn’t change what he’s accomplished.

  35. Amrcanpoet

    It isn’t a big deal to most people, but it is a VERY big deal to the people in his professional life who matter the most right now:

    - Olympic Officials
    - Coaches and Teammates
    - Sponsors (the biggie)

    He can kiss all 3 of those goodbye. But, NOOOooo, a little pot never ruined anyone’s life.

  36. so Fucking What.

    First off, let me say that Guest is a total douche. Now that that’s out of the way….who fucking cares if he toked up a bong? I want the slimy little communist shit twinkle toed cocksucker who took this picture and then released it to the media to get a paralyzing case of the crabs. I want the secret service to gather everyone who thinks this is so horrifying that he should be banned from the next Olympics in one place so I can drop a giant Gonorreah bomb on them. Simple minded fucks. He is, first and foremost, a KID you self righteous snapper heads. I just BET all of you prissy little bitches were just MODEL kids who never…ever…did anything wrong. Right? I didn’t think so. Now STFU you tools. Feel free to marvel at the ownage.

  37. laughingstork

    Imagine the dude’s lung capacity. Like WHOA

  38. Paul

    of course he admitted it was him, no one else in this world would have believed those dumbo ears weren’t his……….

  39. Ripper

    I hated Michael Phelps before…. this makes him cool, I’ll light my bong in his honor. Hit me up Phelps if you want to get stoned.

  40. Cara

    The people who should be embarassed are the girls who would hit on a guy who looks like, well, Michael Phelps.

  41. jrock

    The real A-HOLE is the f ckup who took the photo and leaked it.

    @Cara
    “The people who should be embarassed are the girls who would hit on a guy who looks like, well, Michael Phelps.”

    GDC’s (gold diggin’ cunts)

  42. DrainBamaged

    @36

    No it won’t be a big deal with those people because he wasn’t competing and he acted swiftly. It’s not like a positive test during an event. The only things this hurts is his marketability and how much money he can generate.

  43. DrainBamaged

    @36

    Not it won’t be a big deal with those people because he wasn’t competing and he acted swiftly. It’s not like a positive test during an event. The only things this hurts is his marketability and how much money he can generate.

  44. bob

    If smoking marijuana doesn’t disqualify you from being president (or cocaine in Obama’s case), then why the hell should it matter that Phelps is enjoying a little. Hell, Carter smoked on the roof of the white house with Willie Nelson! He deserves to be as cocky as he wants…hes the best swimmer in the history of the world.

  45. puhleez

    It’s no secret that this amazing athlete likes to party. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if this thing blows over with minimal damage. He’s Michael Phelps, for kryst sake.

  46. floff

    Could he get banned for this?

  47. Girl from party

    So he bong rips and wins gold medals? He’s my hero

  48. Mal

    “Christ, if he was anymore American, he’d be out fighting crime with a talking bald eagle for a sidekick.”

    lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

  49. Mike

    No worries, Obama will save him.

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