Michael Lohan wants YOU to kick his ass

Michael Lohan is auctioning off a chance to get in the ring and punch the press-whore out of him. The auction starts at $5,000 with all proceeds going to charity, according to FOX News:

Jeff Cohen, an organizer for the event, said he expects a big turnout.
“Anybody who jumps into the ring with Michael Lohan will become famous,” Cohen said. “Maybe you’ll get one of Lindsay Lohan’s ex-boyfriends who’ll try and impress Lindsay by beating up her father. Who knows? … You might get Samantha Ronson trying to put a bid in there.”

A chance to punch the snot out of Michael Lohan? I’m in. But, before I write the check, you’re allowed to duct-tape a gun to your boxing glove, right? Because I’m pretty sure that’s how they did it in Rocky. Or maybe I was on acid. Who knows? In the meantime, somebody call Tech Support. My desk is melting again.

Thanks to Kristen who flies like a butterfly, stings like a giant scorpion. True story.