Michael Lohan wants YOU to break up Sam & Lindsay

January 30th, 2009 // 79 Comments

Michael, I’m sorry MIKE Lohan is lamenting the reunion of Lindsay and Samantha Ronson. In a desperate cry for help/attention, he recently took to his blog to call Samantha a gold-digging lesbian who’s ruining Lindsay’s acting career. Enjoy some crazy:

Like I said in the past, “if I see or hear of anyone or anything causing harm or is seen as a threat to my children,” I will speak about it, and do anything I can to try to intervene regardless of the repercussions on me.
With that said, after seeing promise and thanking God for Lindsay’s freedom from SaMANtha’s bondage, I see now, that since SaMANtha has once again, weaseled her way back into Lindsay”s life, things have taken a dark turn.
While I was enthused that Ali was with Lindsay, rather than SaMANtha, I am torn to see that SaMANtha has once again manipulated Lindsay into leaving her little sister in LA, only to join SaMANtha on another DJ gig in Boston.
Was this again, a means for SaMANtha to earn more money through Lindsay”s presence? Did SaMANtha’s fee drop so much and so quickly when word got out that they parted ways? Are we so blind? Is Lindsay so blind? I know Dina and my kids aren’t because they tell me so. But then again, why does Dina tell me one thing and do another?!
When a mother or father sees their child in turmoil (losing weight, not working, and purportedly cutting herself) are we supposed to stand by , remain silent and pretend it isn’t happening? Or are we suppose to step to the plate and not care what people think, and do something about it?
Well, as you can see, I’m not going to sit back and let it slide.
I am asking everyone out their to intervene in every way possible to help Lindsay, and quite possibly, save her life. Help this wonderful, good hearted and gifted young lady to see what SaMANtha is doing to her and how she is destroying her life.
Help her to see that ever since SaMANtha came into her life, nothing good has come of it. As a matter of fact, Lindsay hasn’t used her gifts like she did before meeting SaMANtha.
Just LOOK! The proof is there! These aren’t just words, but FACTS! PLEASE HELP!

I think he’s trying to say Samantha Ronson is a man. I dunno, it’s hard to tell underneath all that subtlety.

Photos: Splash News, WENN

  1. Case

    We have better things to do. Curb your own skank.

  2. havoc

    “he recently took to his blog to call Samantha a gold-digging lesbian who’s ruining Lindsay’s acting career”

    Sounds about right to me….


  3. Brandon

    Lindsay Lohan will never be as hot again as she was in Mean Girls. It seems like she’s stuck on being crack skinny, and she doesn’t look good like that. At all.

  4. Robert Oppenheimer

    You mean these people go OUT looking like this? You’re supposed to change your cloths after you’ve slept in them.

  5. wut???

    damn she’s fugly >_<

  6. jrz

    the SaMANtha stuff is pretty clever for a douche like Michael.

  7. Jessica

    lindsey’s fucking hot.. she can do so much better than this ugly bitch… i mean if she wants to date a girl, she should at least find someone attrative.. i mean she’s fucking lindsey lohan… come on geezz

  8. im.always.first.in.my.heart

    ‘acting career’…that’s funny

  9. Valerie

    Dude, her dad is just trying to get the family off the hook. We all know Lindsay was getting drunk, cracked out and anorexic BEFORE she ever met Samantha–he just has to face it: she’s unbalanced and has a problem. Her GF doesn’t help, that’s true, but if LiLo was SO FUCKING GIFTED and wonderful then she’d be wise enough to fix her own problems, herself. Eh, but she’s only 22. Give her 4 years.

  10. Jumpin_J

    SaMANtha… she’s a MAAAANN baby! Yeah!!!

  11. testing

    Weird, I agree with Michael Lohan for once

    Anybody else agree it isn’t surprising that Lindsay coke-head Lohan’s girlfriend is the sister of Amy crack-head Winehouse’s producer?

  12. uncurled

    her dad is a disgusting waste of a human being.

  13. BEAM

    Does anyone actually buy the idea that Lindsey is into chicks even a little bit?

  14. I just threw up in my mouth looking at those pictures.

  15. I think I just puked again.

  16. BEAM

    Does anyone actually buy the idea that Lindsey is into chicks even a little bit?

  17. ok, michael lohan is crazy in the first place. who really cares if lindsay is a lesbian/bi whatever she is – but she can do way better than samantha ronson. lindsay used to be super cute until she became an anorexic drug addict, so rather than just getting rid of samantha maybe we should get lindsay away from both of her crazy parents


  18. Jupiter Girl

    Wow, he’s looney! If he cared so much, he’d get off the internet and spend more time actually doing something. I understand that he wants help, but putting her in the spotlight even more than she already is, is just completely insane. Apart of me thinks this guy truly cares, but then again, there’s something mischevious about him.

  19. TJ

    She certainly is one skeezy looking rug-eater. You would’ve thought that LiLo, if she ever went gay, could’ve gotten something better than fugly there.

    And, anybody that posts after me eats shit and calls it molasses.

  20. Mr. Jones

    “I think he’s trying to say Samantha Ronson is a man. I dunno, it’s hard to tell underneath all that subtlety.”

    Mike’s prose is a classical study of nuance, and will be analyzed by scholars in the years to come. I’m given it only a cursory reading (yes, I know, I’m being flippant), but I do detect a note of hostility Mike has towards a person called “Samantha”. However, I fail to detect the “man” reference, if it occurs at all…


  21. havoc

    I agree. If they were two hot lipstick lesbians, I’d be like “hell yeah!”.

    But this chick is like one of those NOW lesbians with a man’s haircut.


  22. Mr. Jones (again)

    And forgive the second post, but I’m having a really difficult time deciding which one of these cretins looks more like Gollum.

    Granted, Roson looks every bit like the vile creature that lurked through the muck of a subterranean pond for 500 years, but then Lohan has that huge forehead, the pointed ears, the wicked sneer, and large, lamp-like eyes.

    Help me out here.

  23. Shawn_solo

    Daddy Lohan is a dick. Why go after Ronson for her asexual appearance? I have no idea if Ronson is evil or not, but I do know that homophobia is.

  24. Big Al

    SaMANtha is one ugly dude, er man, er young boy/girl, whatever. She aint prettY!!!

  25. teeshirt

    i think he is misunderstood. i know he’s done some dicked shit before but i feel he does love his kids and still has love for thier mother. i mean lindsy not working and sam seems to always wnat her with her on them gigs. idk, i think pops is on to something.

  26. teeshirt

    i think he is misunderstood. i know he’s done some dicked shit before but i feel he does love his kids and still has love for thier mother. i mean lindsy not working and sam seems to always wnat her with her on them gigs. idk, i think pops is on to something.

  27. p0nk

    well Mike (can i call you Mike?), it sounds like your gravy train is about to be derailed. Bummer dude.

  28. Dee

    He is being really mean, maybe his lowlife crackwhore daughter is a bad influence on Sam.

  29. boo

    This is disturbing on so many levels.

  30. Lisa Simpson

    Winner, winner, winner.

  31. Where's Darkwing Duck?

    @26&27: Micheal you’re not fooling anyone. We all know it’s you & you’re a humongus turd. Leave your stupid family alone. No one was asking for your opinon on the subject.

  32. Just get off with that. They’re a cute couple.

  33. Just get off with that. They’re a cute couple.

  34. Seriously, does SaMALEtha really think (s)he dresses well?

  35. Rick

    There must be an awful smell in their bed in the morning.

  36. Chauncey Gardner

    They look like characters from “Saladfingers”. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go to YouTube and look it up. You won’t sleep for a week.

  37. Duke Steele

    Doesn’t Lohan ever tell her boyfriend to take a shower??? He always looks dirty and I’ll bet he smells,too.

  38. Mike L.

    Dang it, I should have just written “Ronson has toxic bleeding tuna: DO NOT EAT” and left it at that.

  39. mafme

    I think that I’ve noticed a lot less fucked up stuff about her in the news since she got together with Samantha. Of course, he was in prison for a lot of that time, so maybe he didn’t check the tabloid sites as often as he does now. But what i think is obvious to anyone who read about her whorish, coked up, alcohol-soaked adventures during the period before she met Samantha, is that we’re seeing the ravings of a man looking through some very heavily homophobic-tinted glasses. Hell, the “..MAN…” stuff is pretty much evidence of that. Or is he saying that he wants his daughter dating a proper woman?

    This guy is a fuckwit.

  40. XJC

    Still not as disgusting as partial RSS entries. Fuck you, Superfish.

  41. sp

    Actually, I think what “MIKE” is trying to say is that he’d rather have it that he and the rest of the family should be sucking the money and glory of Lindsay’s fame instead of Sam. HELLO “MIKE” the Ronsons already had the money and fame when your precious daughter met Sam. What exactly were you and your family doing before Lindsay made you?

  42. Call

    I thought relationships weren’t allowed without father’s permission anyway. So what’s going on here? Family values gone to pot? If Mr. Lohan meted out his responsibility inisisting that his permission is needed for a relationship then maybe he’d get his own way.

  43. Sayeed

    Lindsay has talent. No matter how much some people say otherwise. She IS a good actress, and could probably get better. She’s had her setbacks, but that depends on each person, how they resolve their problems. No one handles things the same way.

    Her dad needs to get a life. A grown man doing those things is plain pathetic. I’d be fucked up too with a childish father like that. I have a childish dad and thank god he doesn’t have a blog because honestly…

    Samantha Ronson, I have no idea what she’s about. In my opinion, she is pretty unattractive, because I think Lindsay is very pretty, despite how she’s been seen lately.

    Hopefully this girl gets back on track with her career, because I think she can really be HUGE. You can detox the bad shit in your life, but you can’t get rid of talent, in my opinion.

  44. Steve

    Don’t know what Lindsay sees in that ugly dyke. She has a face that could stop a clock.

  45. JustSayin

    If Lindsay loses a little more weight and gets a haircut she would pass for samantha’s twin. Scary.

  46. Harry

    I have dish rags that don’t look as used as Lohan.

    Too bad. She used to be hot, and probably could’ve grown into a pretty good mainstream actress. But this is what happens when you have crazy, fame hungry parents, instead of real parents.

  47. Jennifer Hammond

    Looks like Lindsey’s tits are going down south for the winter. She is in her yong 20′s and already has saggy tits. Gross.

  48. Jas

    Her parents are only trying to help her out, but unfortunately anything they do there is no way of changing her lifestyle. Another thing Lindsey is nasty and so is that she man of a girlfriend she claims to have. The only reason Sam is hanging around Lindsey is because of her money. She is money hungry.

Leave A Comment