Michael Jackson used to be black

August 28th, 2008 // 85 Comments

Michael Jackson, donned in pajama pants and a tuxedo jacket (Still got it!), made an unusual public appearance yesterday at Planet Hollywood in preparation for his 50th birthday celebration. That’s right, this is what a 50-year-old black man is supposed to look like. So, I dunno what Samuel L. Jackson is doing to himself, but it can’t be healthy.

Thanks to Abbi who tricked me into thinking this was Katie Holmes. Ha! I know where you live…

EDIT: Added a computer-generated pic of what Michael Jackson would look like at 50 if he had never met Elizabeth Taylor and decided “Holy poop, I just found the perfect look.” Thanks to James.

Photos: Daily Mail
superficial

  1. Monica

    You know you’d hit it.

  2. Deacon Jones

    Wow, I’m getting old.

  3. Danklin24

    Lmao that Katie Holmes thing was amazing.

  4. Gar

    poor boy

  5. Lola

    Is this a man or an anorexic woman? Either way, U.G.L.Y

    To think, I used to masturbate to this pedophile’s “BAD” album… Sad, sad shame. He’s still the man though and one of the best performers around… Minus all the boy loving and “secret rooms”…. lol

  6. mike jones

    yea no matter how fucked up he looks hes still god

  7. rough daddy

    what the fuck hahaha

  8. p0nk

    what’s black on the inside, white on the outside and comes in little cans?

  9. rough daddy

    if he gets hit by a door its over!

  10. Mikey

    Correction…Michael Jackson used to be HUMAN. Hey, what the fuc…I got some PJ’s like that!

  11. jess

    i thought that was a wax figure at madame tussands….

  12. MM

    My Grandmother wants her sunglasses back.

  13. BlackBanana

    I loved him on Nip/Tuck.

  14. rough daddy

    you know? hes the first celebrity to use vitro be a father! he is a pioneer after all!

  15. pants921

    Is he wearing his shoes on the wrong feet?

  16. Old man he is

    Father Time has grabbed this freak hard. He looks tired and weak and I hope he dies in agony. He is a child molester and should actually have been beaten to death like 15 years ago or whenever.
    He is physically declining and won’t be alive much longer I would venture.

    Moon walking little faerie. Yeah that was soooooo cool, a guy dancing like a wack fag.

  17. simplicity

    he was the man at one point.. now… not so much.

  18. schmuck on wheels

    The missing link?

  19. SqueakyWheel

    Looks like Janice Dickinson in drag (is that an oxymoron?)

  20. missywissy

    Should say “Michael Jackson used to be a ‘man’ ” He’s been white for a long time. However, if he had breasts and shaved down the Ricky Martin chin, he would totally pass as a chick.

    And by the way, anybody in here going on about how wonderful he is, this guy is a pedaphile and DON’T FORGET IT.

  21. Randal

    Even after all you’ve been through Michael over the years, you’re still the King of Pop and no one has come even close to your legendary status since you broke out with Billy Jean.

    Color of our skin is not what matters but rather, who and what we are within. You Michael, are a living example of the good many people in the world need to embrace.

    You are the man in the mirror all other men wish they could be.

    Randal

  22. cbs16

    @16

    Yes….yes he is. He is indeed wearing his shoes on the wrong feet.

  23. Nathiest

    No thanks really you can keep him we don’t want him on our side please take him back.

  24. sharpeidude

    Where’s John Hinckley Jr. when you need him most? This has-been pedophile looney fuck should be sitting in Pelican Bay picking the broom handle splinters out of his ass; not out porking little boys and planning his fucking 50th birthday! Please, please God; just let him slip-up one more time and get caught trying to turn out a 4th grader.

  25. sheila

    It’s call vitiligo! Google it once, educate yourself some.

  26. jeramey

    wow, this guy is still alive?

  27. Bigo

    He must wear pyjamas because he likes to think that it’s bed time all the time when he sees children!!

  28. JIMBO

    I’D HIT THAT, REPEATEDLY.

  29. Lola

    #22 you’re such a flaming fag dude…. I believe you were one of MJ’s little boytoys…. Did he call you bubbles Randy? HA…. But I totally agree with you on everything OTHER than the good example that others should follow… If that’s the case, all his fans are pedophiles just like him.

    The rest of your comments are totally on the fag tip though so you’re on your own with that buddy boy

  30. Anonymous

    Randal has been to one too many of Wacko’s “sleepovers”.

  31. Maggie

    Gross.

  32. Lynz

    It’s a girl!

  33. JPRichardson

    For those of us who remember the peak of MJ’s career, this picture is painful.

    And funny, in a painful way. He is truly agonizing.

  34. NY Ted

    The KING of FREAKS is still the KING FREAKOID of the highest order on earth! He likes to wear the jamies…this way he can pull them down in a second to fuck his little boys up their little tight bum holes…all I can say is he better not be in Vegas when I’ll be there in 2 weeks. Glad I don’t stay at FAGGOT HOLLYWOOD!

  35. sicasso

    Michael Jacksoin was never a God, a genius, an amazing performer, super-talented, or any of that bullshit. He was and always has been a clown masquerading as this “King of Pop” person. But, clearly, this King was overthrown long ago, unmasked as a psychologically devastated idiot-boy, and left to wither in a sea of his own delusion. Again, the cycle of Life and Death cannot reclaim this mistake soon enough. Looks like he could fall off a toilet and fracture his spine anyway, since he’s trying to make the Auschwitz Diet popular in his fairy tale world.

  36. sicasso

    Michael Jackson was never a God, a genius, an amazing performer, super-talented, or any of that bullshit. He was and always has been a clown masquerading as this “King of Pop” person. But, clearly, this King was overthrown long ago, unmasked as a psychologically devastated idiot-boy, and left to wither in a sea of his own delusion. Again, the cycle of Life and Death cannot reclaim this mistake soon enough. Looks like he could fall off a toilet and fracture his spine anyway, since he’s trying to make the Auschwitz Diet popular in his fairy tale world.

  37. ME

    WE are ALL GOD

  38. bootlips

    I can’t knock the guy. If I were black and rich I’d spend my money trying to be white.

  39. Randal must be hunted down and dissected

    Randal dude, what the fuck kind of medicine had Mary Poppins been putting in there with all that sugar? I think you are insane to tell you the truth. A keen eye for fashion and a blatant disregard for morality. Imbalanced I would say.
    I think you would have kind words for Hitler. You know, since he was famous and all.

  40. Wannabe Wigger

    38. “God is dead.” – Nietzsche.

    “Nietzsche is dead.” – God

    It’s ironic that a famous Negro is trying to be a reclusive Wigger.

  41. holy moses ! he’s like a sick action figure !

  42. neitu

    I’d hit it. Then keep driving with it stuck to my wildshield.

  43. Randal

    I love bubble baths and long walks in the beach at night. I like to wear fishnet stockings and red lipstick whenever I go out.

    Randal

  44. Randal

    HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

  45. Macaulay Culkin's Anus

    Michael, I miss you, please call me back!

  46. blanket

    Dear Daddy:

    Why is your pee pee standing up straight?

  47. TheMirrorAintAsFriendly

    Considering the way he has looked in the past he looks great there! Granted much better pre the many plastic surgeries, but still, great. Much better than in other recent outings.

  48. Avi

    In all fairness, this is probably the best I have seen the guy look in years! at least he looks real!

  49. I still stand by my theory that this Is in fact Katie Holmes (or at least will be soon) in a cunning trick by Tom Cruise.

    At the point when no one can tell the difference they can safely be swapped, leaving TC2LTC and Katie to play with the Bubbles in Neverland.

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