Michael Jackson: ‘Know who never gets accused of touching kids? Zorro.’

December 13th, 2008 // 80 Comments

Michael Jackson ran around Beverly Hills last night wearing a black mask and fedora which I can only assume means he’s decided to go “full child molestor.” He’s already growing a mustache, so the rickety van purchase can’t be far behind. Wait, is that a map to Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s house in his pocket? No, seriously, there’s a giant red “X” with the words “Shangri-La” written above it.

Photos: National Photo, The Sun

  1. policegirl01

    For a second there I thought it was Mike Myers in his ‘Love Guru’ getup. Why is the hell is MJ even allowed out in public?

  2. lilly

    MJ is the real Zorro! he has given so much for the needy!

  3. Cornelius

    Jesus, f’ckin Christ that’s creepy. And that poor thing actually believes he can make a comeback. This is not the same man who basically ruled the world in 1984 and through the 1980′s really.

    The only way I can see it happening is if he goes to Las Vegas like Celine Dion.

  4. Zoebee

    Is that Sam Lufti in the background in the first picture?

  5. joey joejoe

    fucking nutcake for sure. how much more confirmation do you need than these pics.

  6. nice photos michel was good and postin

    Celebrity Photos Collection

  7. Michael Jackson the pedo-nigger

    Hi! Hi kids! C’mon, drink your jesus juice! Good! Now . . . some touches are good touches, and some are bad! Mine . . . oh, mine are all good . . . yeah . . . yeah . . .

    Oh! Oh! Heh . . . I, I . . . I just wanna grope you! I just wanna grope you a little bit! C’mere! C’mere! Now, now stand still! Huh . . . uh . . . oh! Let me put my hand . . . touch . . . oh! Touch! Ohhhh! Oooooohh!

    N . . . now you touch me . . . yeah . . . yeah . . . right there . . . oh! Ooooooooooooooohhhh! Aaaaaaaahhhhhhh! Uh uh uh . . .

    Let’s . . . let’s get rid of these awful clothes . . . ooooooh! . . .

  8. Poor mimi

    Hey darlin’ has some tragedy befallen you of late dear? Can you even form one coherent though? We know you love your tribal sister Amy and all and defend Brit Brit for some other reason (you are a dumb whore) but your assorted rants are all interconnected now by one common thread – your psychosis!
    Perhaps the village doesn’t want it’s idiots back after all.

  9. woodhorse

    This is why Maddox has a collection of knives.

  10. woodhorse

    And what has being dressed as a Chinese washer woman with a butt-chin hanging out got to do with Mafia-Zorro? Maybe he was fresh out of the Fake White Man Pedophile clothes.

  11. jez

    what the fuck is this guy’s problem?

  12. So many plastic surgeries have destroyed the blood supply to many parts of his face. I suspect that the decayed parts have been removed for obvious reasons, and Michael is permanently disfigured. Here is a person who fell into the worst kind of self loathing. Basically he wanted to be white – or Diana Ross. Some medical doctor, somewhere along the way should take some of the responsibility. The guy needed psychiatric counseling.

  13. um.. yes, that’s SO inconspicuous with the tiel indian shirt thing on, idiot!

  14. Bobsmithz

    Lol, I love the Dead- Eye Dick reference with Shangri- La. MJ’s music is great, but his mental stability I question.

  15. question

    Why are there still rabid Michael Jackson fans? Yes, he had hits in the 80′s but, my God, aren’t you sick of hearing the same songs for 20 years straight? Do you ever say to yourself…”Well, Michael Jackson was the greatest, but he has not put out a record in 15 years… and he molests kids… maybe I should broaden my horizons a little?” No, I guess you don’t.

  16. hill

    Looks like all that facial reconstruction is falling out, along with his age he should be starting to look really freaky. scary times ahead but kinda interesting too.

  17. my comment

    Where does one even begin?

  18. STINK

    The pedo shitbag has turned into a supervillian!

    Where’s the Punisher when we need him?

  19. who am i ?

    hey,its so sad this site only talks bout pll weakeness.. It just criticing stars..and for all the bad comments,i hope pll would find your weakness and pll you down the same..

    This world of fame industry is crazy..whats crazier is that this superfical website, have to make it crazier for them..remember karma..

  20. who am i ?

    hey,its so sad this site only talks bout pll weakeness.. It just criticing stars..and for all the bad comments,i hope pll would find your weakness and pll you down the same..

    This world of fame industry is crazy..whats crazier is that this superfical website, have to make it crazier for them..remember karma..

  21. KindOfBlue

    Pants status: Shat

  22. Professional Plastic Surgeon

    I would recommend the following surgeries to correct Mr. Jackson’s condition.

    1.) Remove penis, scrotum, testicles and prostate gland, and construct a female vagina in their place.

    2.) Remove decaying nose tissue and create a hollow recess where the nose now is by opening up the sinuses a bit.

    3.) Insert prostate gland into widened sinus cavity, and attach penis and scrotum with testicles in place of nose.

    Allowing the scrotum and testicles to hang down over Mr. Jackson’s mouth will give him the “masked” appearance he seems to crave. Most of his fans are not smart enough to distinguish between a nose and a penis. If his new “nose” is positioned properly with respect to a woman’s vaginal opening, he will be able to father a child every time he sneezes.

  23. Jennifer

    It’s Zorro the Gay Blade!

  24. Anonymous

    Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Poster Boy for Mental Illness.

  25. West Door

    Holy fuck.
    I just peed myself. Thanks a lot.

  26. BMOBLEY

    make the snake spit daddy!!!

  27. BMOBLEY

    make the snake spit daddy!!!

  28. YOURMOM

    is it just me or is that Adnan Ghalib in the background of the first pic???

  29. He’s turning black again because the skin bleach killed his kidneys and liver. Karma will make that ugly white tranny wannabe die the color he/she always hated.

  30. MJatbol

    OMG, a swarm of moronic, disgusting, malicious goblins and apes all of you, who wrote those comments. Are you happy now? You”ll pay in Hell for every ugly word.

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