Michael Rapaport Called Out Aziz Ansari For Trashing Chris Brown

“Heh, it says hooker, get it?”
“Yeah, but that’s just his last name.”
“I don’t bother to understand things before I speak.”

During his SNL monologue, Aziz Ansari likened Donald Trump voters to Chris Brown fans, which is not an entirely accurate comparison, because unlike Chris Brown fans who would watch him punch a baby and still buy tickets to his next show, there are plenty of Trump voters who are starting to realize they got us all tiny-fingered in the butt. But that’s not what Michael Rapaport is pissed off about. He actually somehow combined his defense of a pop-locking fuckboy with a slam on political correctness, which is a collision of internet worlds I’m just not ready for. Would that be Alt-Breezy? No, fuck that. If that exists, I’m eating a bullet. Via The Wrap:

“Obviously, nobody supports beating women. OK. This guy has obviously suffered, you see all the trouble he has and all the trouble that surrounds him. He’s definitely dealing with some s–t and dealing with his own personal demons. But Aziz Ansari, you are one of these holier-than-thou political correct police. This little f—. Mr racial, he’s like Mr. provocative… he’s like, ‘Oh, the brown people this.’ He’s always talking about the brown people and I get that he tries to be racially provocative. He is racially provocative… I said this once and I’ll say it again. If you watch his show ‘Masters of None,’… Aziz Ansari, Mr. f—ing racially provocative, Mr. f—ing button pusher, politically correct judger, has never seen a white girl he hasn’t liked. This guy, every single girl on his show that he’s with, white girls.”

Jesus Christ, that’s a lot to unpack. Okay, let’s take this one rage-spittle claim at a time:

1. Chris Brown has suffered. – BWAHAHAHA, NOPE! Try again, Dick Ritchie.
2. “Political Correct Police” – Which part of not liking Chris Brown beating Rihanna’s face to a bloody pulp or acting like an unapologetic, self-victimizing crybaby for years after that is “politically correct?”
3. Why does Aziz only fuck white girls on his show? – Better question: Did the writer’s room catch fire the second someone pitched “He should move to Italy to make pasta for the finale” because what in the fuck was that?
4. Just to drive this point home, here’s the phrasing Chris Brown chose to describe how he’s going to beat Soulja Boy’s ass:

“He gonna cry in the car.” Hmm… I wonder what that could be in reference to?

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