After a day of weeping outside the courthouse and going on Larry King Live, you’d think Michael Lohan would spend the rest of the night in somber reflection of his daughter’s plight. Except if you actually thought that, you’d be an idiot because the dude went partying! Whoo! Appropriate! Here’s Michael at Saddle Ranch last night where he signed autographs for fans (?), smiled for pictures and told TMZ he was going to call Lindsay from the bar and “make her jealous.” Let me repeat that: Michael Lohan was going to call a SCRAM-wearing, alcoholic Lindsay from a drinking establishment and rub it in her face. — It’s like I want to laugh (more) but at the same time I kind of want to go back and erase everything bad I ever said about Lindsay because Jesus Christ. She never stood a chance. How she hasn’t started picking off toddlers outside a day care by now is anybody’s guess.
Photos: Getty, Splash News




























Randal | July 7, 2010 at 11:13 am
FRIST!
poor guy | July 7, 2010 at 11:17 am
i like his watch
cc | July 7, 2010 at 11:18 am
If you were ever unclear about what a douchebag is, now you know.
Randal | July 7, 2010 at 11:24 am
Excuse my outburst, I felt overjoyed at the opportunity of expressing my admiration for Michael’s courage and composure during these trying times. With his beloved daughter in the midst of the media’s scrutiny, Michael looks appropriately cool and casual in his denim and tees, as he sets exemplary behavior to his fellow A-list celebrities in toning down the frenzy that paparazzi so desperately crave.
Best of luck to Lindsay and her family during this hardship.
Randal
M | July 7, 2010 at 11:25 am
Randal, go fuck yourself.
Jimbo | July 7, 2010 at 11:28 am
Wow Randal, You are actually coming out of your gay closet and coming up with some funny commentary.
Jordan | July 7, 2010 at 12:26 pm
Randal,
Down a full bottle of bleach and take a long walk off a short cliff.
suck it | July 7, 2010 at 10:14 pm
Randal, please make more appearances on this site! I’m sick and tired of all the lame Randal copy cats trying to be you and very much failing. You’re hilarious!
mensa | July 8, 2010 at 3:15 am
Haa Randal needs his own website!
Can't Say | July 8, 2010 at 8:35 am
Randal, It appears there are an overwhelming number of foolios out on the net who have no understanding or experience with sarcasm. Don’t worry, I got it!
Wait a sec…you were being sarcastic, right?
M | July 7, 2010 at 11:24 am
I hate to defend this piece of shit but he never said he was going to call her to “make her jealous”. That was TMZ’s assumption.
basic literacy 101 | July 7, 2010 at 2:00 pm
Thank you for pointing this out!!! Put a little more effort into writing you posts so your damn jokes make sense!
Keith | July 7, 2010 at 11:25 am
Love that slutty mexican he’s with.
Deacon Jones | July 7, 2010 at 11:43 am
And Emmitt Smith
havoc | July 7, 2010 at 1:00 pm
I think that is Emmitt Smith!!! LOL!! Good catch…..
S | July 25, 2010 at 12:44 pm
she’s not mexican and not a slut.
Jimbo | July 7, 2010 at 11:29 am
Fish Dude, Who is the (as Keith calls her) “Slutty Mexican”? She could be the next banner girl… Nice rack!!
ZigZagZoey | July 7, 2010 at 11:30 am
WOW. Incredible.
D ouche
O f
U ber
C olossal
H eights
E verlasting
Stango Betterman | July 7, 2010 at 11:31 am
He needs to be pounded to a fine paste and fed to weasels. This does make me a little more soft on Lindsay. Between this shit stain father and her retarded fame whore mother, what chance did a young girl with mental problems and big tits have?
Jake | July 7, 2010 at 11:44 am
Agreed. Unless she had had the foresight to get twin restraining orders as Christmas presents back in like 1995, there’s no way she could have become a real human.
Jimmy Fury | July 7, 2010 at 1:46 pm
You sick bastard I hope you rot in the hottest part of hell for even thinking something as horrible as that. People like you should be locked up.
Seriously.
Weasels are cute. why would you want to make them suffer like that… jerk.
Feed him to Llamas. Llamas are assholes.
Miss E | July 7, 2010 at 3:16 pm
Or, you could just feed him to Dina. She’s used to it.
Jimmy Fury | July 7, 2010 at 5:07 pm
Might not work on Dina as described. The paste would either have to be made into free ice cream or dried, powdered, and used to cut her blow.
Gone Fishn | July 7, 2010 at 11:53 am
Line forms behind me for the nut kicking, what a f’n scumbag
msa | July 7, 2010 at 12:07 pm
seriously…who is that hot girl in the 1st pic. more pics of her. Ridiculous!
PabloHoney | July 7, 2010 at 1:49 pm
Settle down, Beavis.
She looks like a third-rate Kardashian.
M | July 7, 2010 at 3:50 pm
Good call.
Gene | July 7, 2010 at 12:26 pm
Dude – surely theres got to be a more attractive loser family we can concentrate on?
One in which we get to see twat…and sisters making out…and all of that normal stuff?
M | July 7, 2010 at 3:01 pm
The Hiltons are busy this week.
Pablo | July 7, 2010 at 12:54 pm
This guy is a tool. It’s hard to blame Lindsay for how she is when her parent(s) are the definition of the word “moron.”
Osaka | July 7, 2010 at 1:26 pm
Yeah, I don’t know but i suddenly feel sorry for her.(kinda) and you are right pablo if you have parents like that it’s no wonder you end up like that
M | July 7, 2010 at 3:02 pm
Oh please don’t defend this self-entitled little twat. She is a grown up and is responsible for every bad decision she has made.
Sheena | July 7, 2010 at 5:22 pm
For 99.9% of “celebrities” what you observe is smack on the money, M.
However, when referring to Miss Lindsey, one does have to take into consideration her having been sold into child slavery to the Mouse after having been nurtured by mutant dysfunctionals like Dina & Michael Lohan. Honestly, I don’t see how this kid could possibly be right in the head. Have to agree with Pablo.
tubface | July 7, 2010 at 1:13 pm
no wonder she stuffs narcotics and pharms in her face like a fat kid with cookies
cmyk | July 7, 2010 at 2:10 pm
That’s nothing. My dad calls me up from bars all the time to run it in. The really awkward part was when he called from a brothel, though.
Shannon | July 7, 2010 at 2:12 pm
Wow. That girl never had a chance.
NCDude | July 7, 2010 at 2:22 pm
This site should also have a Douche of the Decade contest. Between this dicklick and Pratt it is neck and neck and only a true vote of the public can determine a true winner.
NCDude | July 7, 2010 at 2:31 pm
I should also add still show pics of hot girls instead of them though because the site needs to maintain it’s integrity and high standards us pervs have become accustomed to over the years.
ItseffingME | July 7, 2010 at 2:58 pm
Who is the girl in the first picture with him? THAT is the real story. My God, she’s gorgeous.
M | July 7, 2010 at 3:48 pm
Hahaha wow you don’t get out much, do you?
Miss E | July 7, 2010 at 2:58 pm
This guy is such a piece of shit.
MJ | July 7, 2010 at 4:01 pm
this whole family is a train wreck
KJ | July 7, 2010 at 4:31 pm
Michael Lohan has fans?? That’s quite frightening.
captain america | July 8, 2010 at 1:02 am
“Lock Up” means something?
Rob | July 8, 2010 at 3:53 am
Who dresses this douch…? And WHY wasn’t someone just punched this guy in the face yet????
Kaz | July 8, 2010 at 8:32 am
What?
Slig | July 8, 2010 at 9:00 am
He like lindsay