Mena Suvari’s Ex-Husband Wants Spousal Support

May 15th, 2012 // 44 Comments
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For two whole years Mena Suvari‘s unemployed ex-husband Simone Sestito got to have sex with her impossibly large chipmunk butt that by all rights should cause her to topple over every time she walks, so why wouldn’t he think that should earn him $17,000/month in spousal support? He practically did her a favor. TMZ reports:

According to court docs filed earlier this week, Simone Sestito claims he has “negative balances” on all his personal and business accounts and has been forced to pay his bills with credit cards and loans from his parents.
Sestito claims Mena makes $750,000/year, which includes a terrible Captain Morgan ad campaign she did that netted her $225,000.
Sestito claims he got used to eating out “almost everyday at high end restaurants” and lists his estimated monthly eating out expense as a whopping $3,000/month. A Happy Meal every once in a while wouldn’t hurt!
Sestito is looking for $17,151/month in spousal support, plus an additional $10k for attorney fees.

DAD: You owe how much to the bank?! Jesus, what were you doing all those years?
SIMONE: Well, I did make this really big hamster wheel for Mena to run on that could theoretically power a whole house, but then I mostly just started having sex with her big butt on it.
DAD: Oh, well, that’s understandable. Will fifty thousand do?

(Good dads listen.)

Photos: Bauer-Griffin


  1. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    nice pooper!

  2. mrsmass

    how about $100 towards groceries every week instead. this guy sounds like a worthless bag of shit.

  3. FruitLoop

    “forced to pay his bills with credit cards”

    Ah, American ingenuity at work. In debt, hell, just put it on your credit card, that will solve it.

    Oh, and the new American dream. If you can’t sue someone for a ton of money, marry a rich chick (or guy) use ‘em, and then cash out. Profit!

  4. dope

    Paper Gangster!

  5. Blueman

    That is not a real man.

  6. Smapdi

    Hah, a dude named “Simone”! He should be suing his parents.

  7. Cock Dr

    Resisting the entertainment industry pressure to get implants is super, but why why why the ugly ass tattoo over the breastbone?
    She needs no enhancements; that ass speaks for itself.
    I would imagine some of the site’s horndogs are trying to strike up some sort of conversation with it right now.

  8. meme

    Take a long gander you FAT COWS.
    THAT is an ass.

  9. El Jefe

    Got to love the shitty MS 13 gangbanger tattoo on her chest. Classy.
    This chick has really milked a long career off of two movies, I have to give her props for that.

    And she married the douche, so she gets what she deserves I guess.

    • dooood

      bad choices in men is hardly uncommon for women.
      but if one ever ends up with a genuinely classy, respectable person, chances are you wont ever hear about it.

  10. BigDaddy

    He should be taking out and have his balls cut off. If he even has any. Yes she has a great ass not like that Kim K with all those nasty creaters everywhere.

  11. MarkM

    Nothing sexxxier than a prison tattoo right inbetween a girl’s breasts! Oh wait, yes there is…ANYTHING is sexxxier!

  12. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    The Royal Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    That ass is the gift that keeps on giving.

  13. Cardinal Fang

    Remember when only cool or tough people had tattoos? Now every little douche and punk has one. “I’m expressing my individuality” Gee, where’s the individuality in something everyone has.

  14. USDA Prime McBeef

    no self respecting man needs spousal support. get a fucking job like the rest of us, asshole. that goes for women too.

  15. Just Some Girl

    Gold digger!!!

  16. Crissy

    Seriously douche? I mean, dude?!!

  17. Bobu

    Well, he was earlier described as “club promoter”. Seriously, that translates to “unemployed wannabe douche”.

    Also – let me get this straight, doing absolutely nothing earns her $750k a year? I’m in the wrong business.

    • dooood

      perhaps bobu, perhaps.
      but you’re only looking at the top of the hill.
      there is an entire abyss of poser, reject, desperate wannabe actors, screenwriters, directors, producers etc. that make up the bulk of the hollywood scene.

      there’s even a few good george burns and hunter s. thompson quotes about it.

  18. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    i’d sniff that…hard!

  19. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    That's what I'm talking about
    Commented on this photo:

    shame about the rest of her

  20. Perry King

    Wonder if she’s tight ?

  21. Duke Steele

    Who cares about them? She’s got a really cute ass.

  22. Viper15

    He prabably won’t get anywhere with it, but good for him. Equality’s a bitch! Hahaha!

  23. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she’s fug but I’d sure like to munch her 2hole!

  24. josh

    “I’m used to driving a ferrari so now even though we’re not together you need to buy me a ferrari”. GTFO.

  25. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    Grand Poobah
    Commented on this photo:


  26. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    Grand Poobah
    Commented on this photo:

    spankable as long as I don’t have to look at the stupid tatts I need to add

  27. Mena Suvari Bikini Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing to See her; Move along…

  28. Dramatic Puddle

    Who the hell is she?

  29. dewand

    She should have to pay the alimony he became use to a certain lifestyle.

  30. I would wreck this chick. I love her body. Shame about the stupid tattoos, though.

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