Good Morning, Melissa Rummells, And Other News

- Mahky Mahk lost 60 fuckin’ pounds. Give him an Oscah. [Lainey Gossip]

- Jennifer Garner says, “you’re welcome,” for Ben Affleck’s dick. [Dlisted]

- Can We Just Stay In Bed All Day? [theCHIVE]

- Jessica Simpson’s calves are out of control. [Fishwrapper]

- Sarah Silverman wants to abolish The Vagina Tax. [The Frisky]

- Miley Cyrus’ VMA date is in jail already. [WWTDD]

- Nickelodeon event cancelled at NYC Comic-Con thanks to idiot’s epically racist interview. [Death and Taxes]

- Kate Upton’s breasts demand to be free! [Popoholic]

- Kendra Wilkinson milking Hank’s affair is on TV now. [tooFab]

- Drake banged a stripper and regretted it immediately. [IDLYITW]

- Xenia Deli is still very, very hot. [Hollywood Tuna]

- Sofia Vergara is Botoxing. This won’t end well. [Celebslam]

- What’s up, Kirstin Liljegren? [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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