Melissa Gorga Was ‘Taken Out Of Context’ When She Wrote Husbands Should Rape Their Wives

September 26th, 2013 // 46 Comments
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Yesterday, the Internet had a goddamn field day with Melissa Gorga‘s marriage advice book Love Italian Style considering the following passage she included using Joe‘s own words basically advocates marital rape. Via Jezebel:

Men, I know you think your woman isn’t the type who wants to be taken. But trust me, she is. Every girl wants to get her hair pulled once in a while. If your wife says “no,” turn her around, and rip her clothes off. She wants to be dominated.
Women don’t realize how easy men are. Just give us what we want.

There’s also a hodge-podge of sociopathic anecdotes about making sure she fucks her husband or he’ll turn into the Italian Hulk and break the baby’s high chair before running out to bang the first putanna he sees. It’s a real pasta e fagioli. More importantly, NEVER LET MEN KNOW YOU POOP:

Girls don’t poop. Me, never have. Never will. It just doesn’t happen. Or, that’s what Joe thinks! We’ve been married for nine years, and he has never once seen or smelled my business. How have I pulled this off? I don’t do it when he’s around or awake. In an emergency, I have my ways of pooping so he won’t hear, smell, or see. It’s a challenge.

“I take the kids to a shelter whenever we have Mexican. Haha! Men.”

So now that everyone’s got a chance to copy and paste passages verbatim from the book and yell, “JESUS CHRIST,” Melissa’s claiming on Twitter that her words were taken out of context:

I’m so disgusted that a reporter has taken things completely out of context simply for shock value. #SAD
If you’ve read my book, you know that I am promoting mutual love, respect, honesty, and loyalty. #TRUTH

You let your husband write in your advice book that men should forcibly take sex from their wives without their consent which is rape. #TRUTH And then you advocated hiding your feces lest your man know you have a working digestive system and leave you for a 20-year-old with a stapled shut anus. #SAD So unless the words before and/or after that were, “This is total fiction. Call the police if your husband rapes you and/or beats you with a booster seat because you pooped,” you should probably stop talking about context and just enjoy the mountains of cash from idiots who are going to buy your book because America stopped investing in education. Or I’ll tell Joe you’re complaining again and not join the search party. Ball’s in your court.

Photos: Getty

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  1. To be a post-modernist douchebag, I think what she meant in her original blather is that many women feel that they need to live a life that forces them to act a certain prim/chaste way most of the time, and are therefore hiding their inner sexual urges. She is urging husbands to help their wives shatter that anti-feminist paradigm and awaken the inner sexual being that their wife truly is.

    Or maybe she’s just a dipshit. I dunno.

    • Guess again. According to her delusional belief system, which is, after all, just her echoing her husband’s complex system of demands, wives are supposed to be putanas at home – the reason for that this is that if a wife is always on tap for sex, the husband will never, ever even look at another woman or set foot in a strip club because he’s so totally, utterly satisfied. Yeah, when you stop laughing you can marvel at how much KoolAid she had to drink to actually believe that.

      The wife also needs to have dinner on the table, always be home when the husband returns so he never has to come home to an empty house because that’s “disrespectful, and never do anything that he finds distasteful – if she has diarrhea I assume she’s supposed to either commit suicide or leave the country.

      Her mistake is not realizing she’s married to a fucking asshat, and thinking that everyone else would be equally perfectly happy married to an abusive and infantile man as long as they know how to placate him.

      I have an uncle who served 30 years defusing bombs for the Chicago PD and he had an easier time of it than this clueless bitch probably has. At least he can take a shit whenever he needs to.

      • Bruce Lee's Left Pinky

        Now, I’m not Italian, but, I’ve been around Goombah’s all my life. I went to school with them, I live in a neighborhood that’s 80% Italian, I’ve hung out with them, and I’ve dated their women. I never watched “Jersey Shore” because I lived it. (vicariously) Believe me when I say; this shit is typical. Of course it’s not ALL Italians, but there’s still a huge community of those “old school” Italians walking around. That’s why she felt so comfortable saying all of this crap out loud, because that’s how all the men & women in her insulated, backward, misogynistic circle think. She forgot for a second that, like the Mafia, that shit is supposed to “stay in the family”, so to speak.

  2. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh, Joe! Facing the wall is my position, not yours, silly! #RAPEFUN”

  3. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “I”m SO not pooping right now! #COLOSTOMYBAGISFULL”

  4. In fairness, their safe word is “carbonara,” so there’s never enough time for things to get really out of hand.

  5. Why are we taking advice from Italians in the first place? They’ve never won a war or even mass-produced a decent car!

  6. Cock Dr

    It’s almost as if the blogger had some feminist leanings and attitudes….the juxtaposition between that and all the blog’s leering upskirts and nip slips is an interesting one.

    • (nods head, looks disapprovingly with arms crossed at Fish)

    • I find the appreciation of the female body endearing, and not at all overshadowed by featuring mostly Hollywood trash who make the conscious decision to leave the house in mini skirts with their labia hanging out. Saying “damn, nice boobs” and “I wanna skull-f*ck the s**t out of that sl*t until she chokes out and gags on her own vomit” – two totally different sentiments. Usually.

  7. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Please don’t be advising men to pull hair & rip clothes.
    Some of us actually don’t care for that.
    In fact, following her dumb advice might get a man jailed or in the hospital emergency room.

  8. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Echo5
    Commented on this photo:

    Thought Chris Brown and Rhianna got back together again

  9. The Most Interesting

    “…and leave you for a 20-year-old with a stapled shut anus.”

    Why would anyone want a 20 year old who can’t do ass-to-mouth?

  10. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “I love doing things to please a stumpy little orange chimpanzee! #SELFLOATHING”

  11. “In an emergency, I have my ways of pooping so he won’t hear, smell, or see. It’s a challenge.”

    …Melissa continued

    “sometimes if we’re eating something really heavy for dinner, like pasta fa joule, when the urge hits Ill slip into the kitchen to “refill my wine” and defecate in the dog’s dinner bowel. I poop stawberries and cream so Woofy just eats it right up!”

  12. Lady Mimsy von Noonerhole

    She’s absolutely right. There’s nothing us gals like more than a little “surprise sex”. Lord Noonerhole tried this with me once. How we laughed afterwards in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. Unfortunately, the operation to re-attach his genitalia was not successful.

  13. Girl Who Poops

    Just yesterday I took a crap and my husband walked in and smelled the horrors unleashed and I’m pretty sure he still love me, so yeah, she’s full of shit (no pun intended).

    • Muffin

      To be fair, men should learn how to light a match, too. (Just in case you’re not so wealthy your 1-bed doesn’t come with 2 bathrooms.)

  14. So, what color crayon did she choose to write the book with?

  15. I can see where she’s coming from, sort of. If you’re married to someone and don’t want them to have intercourse with you, there are other problems. Yes, timing is important, but if you’re married to someone who decides to “take you” while you’re changing the baby or frying bacon, despite your pleas for him to stop, well, why the hell did you marry that person. Furthermore, I don’t poop. My food metabolizes into fairy sprinkles and rainbows that materialize and then dissipate into thin air, leaving a pleasing lavender fragrance.

  16. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Commented on this photo:

    If you look at this photo just right, he’s just bitchslapped the shit out of her.

  17. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Imma gonna slap the taste outta ya mouth ho!’

  18. A little word of advice: Always ask for consent before you start pushing your dick into a woman. Fail to do that and you’ll end up in jail and your cellmate will probably share your dislike of asking for consent before he pushes his dick into you.

    • This douchebag is proud that he doesn’t ever take “no” for an answer, and she’s delusional enough to think that all she has to do is give him sex whenever he wants it, no matter if she does or not, and he’ll never want to so much as look at another woman, let alone think of cheating on her.

      They deserve each other.

  19. Mamp Pinkus

    how long before this stupid gal finds out her hubby is having multiple affairs?

  20. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Commented on this photo:

    this has become an instant meme. just crop out the website stamp at the bottom and ur all set baby

  21. eh

    What is she thinking? Women hate that kind of s/m stuff! This is why that Fifty Shades of Grey book didn’t sell a single copy. Cause all the women were like, “What, I never had that urge ever!”

    • Consensual BDSM roleplaying is entirely different from this sad attempt to celebrate an abusive marriage. Please learn the difference between fictional porn fantasy and real life before you use that line of thinking to justify grabbing a woman by the hair and ripping her clothes off because you know that she secretly doesn’t really mean “no”.

  22. Mel Gibson's Shrink

    Fucking stupid whore.

  23. dirkle

    Jeez, out of context this one. She clearly was not talking about rape. Didn’t realize there were so many prudes on this site. Seriously, you’re missing out on some fun.

    • Since you’re obviously not a prude, how about we lock you in a room with a guy who also “doesn’t take no for an answer” for a few hours? Sounds like the fresh meat in prison isn’t missing out on any of that “fun” either.

  24. Pasta e f—?

    *mutters a curse under my breath*

  25. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “He bitch slaps me and I giggle. That’s the way all women should act after getting one right in the cocksucker.”

  26. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    AweseomeTownie
    Commented on this photo:

    Too bad they don’t have professional photographers at things like this.

  27. gigi

    what she’s talking about is passion which is reciprocated as necessary, and was totally taken out of context for whatever shock value, of course, which you’re feeding into….

    • No, she’s not. Read the damn book before you start bleating that this is taken out of context: “If your wife says “no,” turn her around, and rip her clothes off. She wants to be dominated. Women don’t realize how easy men are. Just give us what we want.”

      Otherwise known in the court system as marital rape.

      FYI, “reciprocated as necessary” translates to “I’ll have to fuck you although I’m so not in the mood because unless you get your way there’ll be big trouble”. In other words, give him what he wants (see above).

      • gigi

        meh… maybe she rapes him back & he digs it…. well you seem very impassioned! it’s a lame, highly edited reality show, with bs storylines, what’s with the winded paragraphs of reprimand? go find a stairclimber or stationary bike

  28. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Commented on this photo:

    So that’s the guy raping her? Jeez, I was all like whatever before, but now I just feel sorry for her.

  29. Melissa Gorga Joe Gorga L*Space By Monica Wise Fashion Show
    Jane Doe
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG! The PINK BATHROBE!!! RAPE ME NOW!!! BEFORE I POOP!!!

  30. Rose

    That’s right, men. “No” actually means “Keep going!” and not “If you continue one more second, you’re going to be sitting in prison taking it up the ass no matter how many times YOU might say no.”

    What a moron.

  31. Hawk

    Who is this woman?

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