Mel Gibson drinks and drives and acts crazy

July 31st, 2006 // 141 Comments

Mel Gibson was arrested for a DUI on Friday after going 87 mph in a 45 mph zone, and during his confrontation with the arresting officers started acting nuts and saying ridiculously offensive things:

Once inside the car, a source directly connected with the case says Gibson began banging himself against the seat. The report says Gibson told the deputy, “You mother f****r. I’m going to f*** you.” The report also says “Gibson almost continually [sic] threatened me saying he ‘owns Malibu’ and will spend all of his money to ‘get even’ with me.” The report says Gibson then launched into a barrage of anti-Semitic statements: “F*****g Jews… The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.” Gibson then asked the deputy, “Are you a Jew?” The deputy became alarmed as Gibson’s tirade escalated, and called ahead for a sergeant to meet them when they arrived at the station. When they arrived, a sergeant began videotaping Gibson, who noticed the camera and then said, “What the f*** do you think you’re doing?” A law enforcement source says Gibson then noticed another female sergeant and yelled, “What do you think you’re looking at, sugar tits?”

And on Saturday he issued a statement apologizing for his behavior, saying:

“After drinking alcohol on Thursday night, I did a number of things that were very wrong and for which I am ashamed. I drove a car when I should not have, and was stopped by the LA County Sheriffs. The arresting officer was just doing his job and I feel fortunate that I was apprehended before I caused injury to any other person. I acted like a person completely out of control when I was arrested, and said things that I do not believe to be true and which are despicable. I am deeply ashamed of everything I said. Also, I take this opportunity to apologize to the deputies involved for my belligerent behavior. They have always been there for me in my community and indeed probably saved me from myself. I disgraced myself and my family with my behavior and for that I am truly sorry. I have battled with the disease of alcoholism for all of my adult life and profoundly regret my horrific relapse. I apologize for any behavior unbecoming of me in my inebriated state and have already taken necessary steps to ensure my return to health.”

As is usually the case, I like drunk Mel Gibson a hell of a lot more than sober Mel Gibson. Sure, sober Mel Gibson directed Braveheart, but drunk Mel Gibson calls women “sugar tits” and insults entire groups of people. He could stop a bullet with his bare hands and he still wouldn’t be as awesome in my eyes as he is this very moment.

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Comments (141)

  1. Linnea | July 31, 2006 at 8:10 am

    I’m going to start sleeping with a rosary on so that good ol’ Mel doesn’t mistake me for a dirty Jew and start the Holocaust one sugartits at a time.

    Reply
  2. RKW | July 31, 2006 at 8:10 am

    The apple does not fall far from the tree it seems….check out info on his daddy Hutton Gibson….for shame Mel, this isn’t what women want….

    Reply
  3. knowhere | July 31, 2006 at 8:12 am

    what a douche — he gives drunkards a bad name. personally, i just get very charming, witty, and good looking when i drink.

    Reply
  4. Stacyy | July 31, 2006 at 8:20 am

    wow. mel gibson still exists? for a moment there i thought he had become a monk in hiding or something. nice way to expose himself again..

    Reply
  5. Celetina | July 31, 2006 at 8:28 am

    He apologizes to the world and the officers involved, but what about the Jews?

    Reply
  6. Ramblebrook | July 31, 2006 at 8:34 am

    #5 – What about the Jews? Its evident he has a point about them starting all the wars. Just look at East Timor and that nasty scuffle in Uganda. Damn Jews.

    Reply
  7. RichPort | July 31, 2006 at 8:40 am

    Actually, he was misquoted in his tirade. He was so drunk he mistook the officer for a Mexican border control guard (I know, that sounds like an oxymoron, but he WAS drunk) and began trying to imitate a Mexican accent, doing his best Speedy Gonzalez: “Joos are respunseebul for all dee wars in dee worl. Joos are a boonch of borda huppas. ARRIBA! ANDALE!!” Personally, I think his denegration of the Mexican accent is appalling. Besides, we know Mexicans only start wars over weed. And tequila. But then, so do I.

    Reply
  8. LRonHubbaHubba | July 31, 2006 at 8:44 am

    Is he talking about Jesus Christ King of the Jews?

    He is a blithering idiot nazi.

    Reply
  9. ja5on | July 31, 2006 at 8:44 am

    So what if he apologized? He just sobered up and realized how what he said will effect his career. It’s not like apologizing changes how one feels or thinks. Wasn’t it the romans who said alcohol brings out the truth?

    Reply
  10. sikofdis | July 31, 2006 at 9:06 am

    This story is awesome! And Mel, the Jews may be “responsible” for a lot, but Jesus never really got any pussy.

    http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=429

    Reply
  11. DancingQueen | July 31, 2006 at 9:08 am

    I’ve always loved his movies but I knew there had to be something wrong with him when he had like 10 kids. In this day and age with birth control at your fingertips, that just proves your fucking crazy.

    Also, alcohol IS the ultimate truth serum. It doesn’t change who you are, just lifts your inhibitions so you say what you truly feel.

    Reply
  12. blueballs | July 31, 2006 at 9:11 am

    Mel should be punished by becoming a UN observer in Lebanon.

    Reply
  13. leahdeadly | July 31, 2006 at 9:19 am

    Mad Mel: Beyond Thunderdome
    This guy needs a reality check.

    Reply
  14. kipshere | July 31, 2006 at 9:24 am

    “Awsesome” is the only word for it, Superficial! oh wait, virulently anti-Semitic. That fits too. Your choice, I guess.

    Reply
  15. Bugman4045 | July 31, 2006 at 9:32 am

    I’ve done a lot of drinking and drugging and I never did, in all my shameful and debauched behavior, anything that I didn’t fantasize about doing when I was sober. During and after “Passion of the Christ” I was willing to cut Gibson some slack and believe he and his father were different. His tirade proves he is nothing more than a crazy anti-semite.

    Reply
  16. spatz | July 31, 2006 at 9:32 am

    come on now is he really wrong about the jews? shut up sugartits.

    Reply
  17. Smivey | July 31, 2006 at 9:40 am

    According to my sources, this incident never occurred. It was all fabricated by the Jews to make the Nazi party look bad. Truth be told, Mel Gibson is an outstanding citizen and an excellent Nazi. And while he may believe everything that he supposedly said that night, none of it actually happened. There isn’t even a city in California named Malibu. That’s just what they want you to believe. Uh huh.

    Reply
  18. Toonlite | July 31, 2006 at 9:42 am

    I hope he gets help….seriously….if you’re outta control….it’s a problem……much like the girls on “Girls gone wild”…one day someones gonna have to pay the piper….

    Reply
  19. yeah-sweety | July 31, 2006 at 9:44 am

    this site has gotten so freakin boring! am i seriously the only one who thinks so? this story is like 4 days old …

    Reply
  20. alaskanchicsickle | July 31, 2006 at 9:50 am

    Jeez, now I don’t feel so bad about getting drunk last week and hugging strange people in the park. How sad for his family, could you imagine being one of his kids right now?
    @10 Jesus got all the pussy he desired.

    Reply
  21. januaryanne | July 31, 2006 at 9:51 am

    is it sick that i am glad he is showing us that he’s not perfect? i’m in the south and i will tell you he is a pop icon around here. just like that confounded Bono. CON-FOUND-IT!

    i feel bad for his alcoholism but good that maybe my friends will take down that graven image they have of the guy.

    Reply
  22. CMonster0125 | July 31, 2006 at 9:57 am

    Why didn’t his agent just claim it was heat exhaustion? We’d believe that in a heartbeat. But calling a female cop “sugartits”? That’s one of for the books.

    Reply
  23. HairPie | July 31, 2006 at 10:00 am

    Good thing he made a bizzilion dollars with Passion of the Christ because his career is OVER. You can’t swing a dead cat in Hollywood without sucking circumsized dick for a job. I should know…slurp…

    Reply
  24. JollyJumjuck | July 31, 2006 at 10:02 am

    Considering he was let go with a warning twice before for going waaaay over the speed limit, I predict he will get a slap on the wrist for this. Especially when he slaps on the blue woad face paint and starts getting aggressive.

    Reply
  25. Praz | July 31, 2006 at 10:04 am

    That Riggs is such a loose cannon, he should be taken off the force.

    Reply
  26. Zanna | July 31, 2006 at 10:04 am

    I can’t believe he said he owned Malibu. He didn’t even apologize for that part!

    Reply
  27. krisdylee | July 31, 2006 at 10:05 am

    I got nothin.

    Reply
  28. krisdylee | July 31, 2006 at 10:05 am

    Well, except for an awesome pair of sugartits.

    Reply
  29. saltpeanuts | July 31, 2006 at 10:06 am

    Sugar tits? That’s AWESOME, and right up there with milkbags, silky milkies, bolt-ons and tupperware tata’s. I’ll have to use that line on one of my whores.

    Reply
  30. RichPort | July 31, 2006 at 10:06 am

    #23

    You’re probably right. My scripts for “The Softer Side of Islam” and “Jews Can Be Mean Too” got turned down by Dreamworks 13 times already. Maybe I’ll petition Spike Lee.

    Reply
  31. ValeWolf | July 31, 2006 at 10:06 am

    Yay! We have a new word!!! sugartits. I love it.
    Firecrotch was getting REALLY old.

    Reply
  32. SoftBlueGlow | July 31, 2006 at 10:08 am

    Nothing better than waking up to Braveheart and Sugar Tits. Is there?

    http://www.VeryLiberating.com

    Reply
  33. PapaHotNuts | July 31, 2006 at 10:10 am

    Sgt. Roger Murtaugh was visibly disappointed upon hearing this.

    Reply
  34. bootface | July 31, 2006 at 10:11 am

    DAYYYYYYYYAMMMMNNNNN its JUST like that south park episode!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  35. Fatty Boom-Batty | July 31, 2006 at 10:16 am

    In a candid conversation that Mel and I had a few years ago he disclosed a secret. He told me that ALL Jews could walk on water and turn water into wine. He said that they just don’t show-off like they used to, especially after what happened to the last guy that did…

    Reply
  36. HairPie | July 31, 2006 at 10:19 am

    #30…sorry, I was swallowing.

    Yes, perhaps Mel should party with “Hymie Town” Reverend Jackson. They could get some Colt 45s, some blow and hit the town…perhaps a movie, Lethal Weapon 5 – Stakeout in Hymie Town.
    Oy!

    Reply
  37. sharkbite | July 31, 2006 at 10:22 am

    He was on a mission from god!

    http://www.wehateeverybody.com

    Reply
  38. This is a Rock 'n Roll Takeover | July 31, 2006 at 10:23 am

    I don’t know if a lot of people know this, but Mel Gibson is one of those assholes who doesn’t believe the Holocaust really happened. Someone should take him into a shower and turn on some poisonous gas…then shove a pickle up his ass for flare.

    Reply
  39. snookyookums | July 31, 2006 at 10:27 am

    #35 that was hysterical. Good one

    Reply
  40. katie | July 31, 2006 at 10:29 am

    leave it to the jews to whine whine whine on the board about anti semitism. they would be perfectly happy with it if he was bashing someone else. do you guys want some cheese with that?

    hes right about the war thing unfortunately. you all wouldnt get so defensive if it wasnt true.

    and it has nothing to do with the religion but with the behavior of the people who ascribe to it.

    although not thinking the holocaust happened is severely fucked up. i just dont like any hyperreligious person, and mell gibson is insane.

    Reply
  41. frenchtoaststix | July 31, 2006 at 10:31 am

    I used to like Mel, back in the “Bounty” days when his bones were jumpable, but now he looks like Sadaam’s more insane brother. After watching the Oscars(TM) when he won for Braveheart numerous times, I lost all respect for him. He didn’t look at or acknowledge his wife sitting right next to him during these wins, just jumped up and grabbed his award. Hah! I didn’t even mean to make a comical metaphor there. I’ll bet he “grabs his award” everytime he sees a nice pair of “sugar tits.”

    Reply
  42. katie | July 31, 2006 at 10:32 am

    #11 there is something wrong with him to have 11 kids and its called hes a crazy catholic.

    Reply
  43. Italian Stallion | July 31, 2006 at 10:32 am

    I wonder how he feels about black people?

    Reply
  44. LoneWolf | July 31, 2006 at 10:36 am

    Just because you’re rich and famous doesn’t mean that you’re not as crazy as a shithouse rat.

    Reply
  45. alaskanchicsickle | July 31, 2006 at 10:38 am

    @34 I was thinking the same thing, I’m surprised he didn’t start smearing his shit everywhere.

    Reply
  46. januaryanne | July 31, 2006 at 10:39 am

    @40 that’s possibly the most retarded thing i’ve ever seen posted on this site.

    you wouldnt get so defensive if it wasn’t true??? that doesn’t make sense. that’s like, you find love when you stop looking for it. i would think that would decrease your chance. additionally, if i were jewish and someone accused me of that shit hitler did, i’d be “ascribin” to kickin your ass ASAP.

    woo. pardon me for losing my temper. this si so uncharacteristic, what with me being just a regular caucasian and not having any of the more violent races in my blood.

    Reply
  47. bootface | July 31, 2006 at 10:50 am

    45 –

    Mel Gibson: I have to use that money to build my church! I brought the fire and brimstone back to Christianity with “The Passion” and now I’m gonna start my own church! And do you know why? So I can play banjo! (singing while playing the banjo) Jesus, oh how I love ya, how I love ya Jesus!

    Reply
  48. Triumph Insult Dog | July 31, 2006 at 10:51 am

    All I could think about when I read this was that episode of “South Park” after he did the “Passion” movie. Hilarious!…

    Reply
  49. DancingQueen | July 31, 2006 at 11:03 am

    My boss is Jewish. No, not a Jewish carpenter.

    Reply
  50. goodaussiep | July 31, 2006 at 11:13 am

    Drunk? He blew a .12, and I don’t think that qualifies for the, “I was soo drunk I don’t remember hating Jews, and calling a cop sugartits” alibi. Lightweight.

    Reply

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