Matthew McConaughey’s mom is goddamn insane

August 27th, 2008 // 70 Comments

I’m starting to understand Matthew McConaughey a whole lot more after finding about his mom Kay McConaughey’s book. Entilted “I Amaze Myself” the memoir contains anecdotes about Matthew’s conception and his father dying during sex. I wish I was making this up. Us Weekly reports:

“On Monday mornings, he and I often said goodbye by making love,” Kay says exclusively in the latest issue of Us Weekly. “But one day, all of a sudden, it just happened. I knew that something was wrong, because I didn’t hear anything from him. Just nothing,” she says. “But it was just the best way to go!”
And when her man couldn’t be revived, she made sure he was taken from the house in the buff.
“I was just so proud to show off my big old Jim McConaughey — and his gift,” she says.

Awesome. So, Matthew McConaughey’s dad’s final moments were spent having Viagra-induced old people sex followed by EMTs staring at his naked cock. Oh yeah, sign me up for that. Here I was going to die young in a bank vault full of strippers and go-karts. Clearly, I have no idea how to live. I forgot the part where people look at my old dead nuts. So stupid….

superficial

  1. THE REAL BARELY

    In my mind I’m teabagging this hot old fossil even as I type this…

  2. malicious

    since when is your life book-worthy purely from having a famous kid? These parents that think they are famous for spawning someone famous really fuck me off.

  3. jim

    jeez, i’m sure the last thing matthew wants to read about is his mom’s sex life. as for harvey milk day, well what do you expect, its california[soon to be mexifornia] and i’m waiting for the day it slides into the pacific. as for the homosexual movement, first we had to tolerate it [which i did] then accept it [which i also did] now we have to rejoice in it [which i will not do.] as for the catholic priests, well i was a victim of one of them and there is nothing funny about that happening to a child, even the money i got didn’t help with the depression i feel to this day. i find liberals the most tolerant people, unless you don’t agree with them, which is when the name calling starts. todays liberals remind me of the nazi party, neither group accepts opinons that are not in agreement with theirs,

  4. jim

    jeez, i’m sure the last thing matthew wants to read about is his mom’s sex life. as for harvey milk day, well what do you expect, its california[soon to be mexifornia] and i’m waiting for the day it slides into the pacific. as for the homosexual movement, first we had to tolerate it [which i did] then accept it [which i also did] now we have to rejoice in it [which i will not do.] as for the catholic priests, well i was a victim of one of them and there is nothing funny about that happening to a child, even the money i got didn’t help with the depression i feel to this day. i find liberals the most tolerant people, unless you don’t agree with them, which is when the name calling starts. todays liberals remind me of the nazi party, neither group accepts opinons that are not in agreement with theirs,

  5. jim

    jeez, i’m sure the last thing matthew wants to read about is his mom’s sex life. as for harvey milk day, well what do you expect, its california[soon to be mexifornia] and i’m waiting for the day it slides into the pacific. as for the homosexual movement, first we had to tolerate it [which i did] then accept it [which i also did] now we have to rejoice in it [which i will not do.] as for the catholic priests, well i was a victim of one of them and there is nothing funny about that happening to a child, even the money i got didn’t help with the depression i feel to this day. i find liberals the most tolerant people, unless you don’t agree with them, which is when the name calling starts. todays liberals remind me of the nazi party, neither group accepts opinons that are not in agreement with theirs,

  6. you know what they say?
    THE OLDER THE HORNIER!!

  7. Hatey McWrathenstein

    Look at that picture.

    WTF is up with the black cloth umbilical-Donnie Darko thing going on there between the estrogen factories?

  8. Jules

    @ hammer, more like Cindy McCain to me.

  9. Jammy

    Cloris

  10. So Right

    You made me laugh out loud at work. This is the funniest post ever! I love you!

  11. Charon

    You think the old are loathsome, but you merely project your own fear of dying onto them. Whistling in the graveyard … Soon you will know.

  12. Poop

    I made a stinky.

  13. HuckyDucky

    Plus she shoots those black things out of her stomach. Look at her. She’s sucking the life force out of his girlfriend.

  14. FUNNIEST SHIT EVER.. I’m gonna be laughing my ass off on the train ride home to work..people are going to think I’m nuts. I still cant stop laughing..

  15. jw

    yo , all guys wanna go out with a bang or a boner but reguideless of it all if my was to write a book talking how my dad while on top of is kinda wrong but yo if that how they roll!!!!!!!! MAKE IT DO WHAT IT DO!!!!

  16. fred

    All these rich motherfuckers are all retrobates. They will all burn in hell. In Nomonie Satanas!

  17. same old same old

    batshit crazy does not even begin to describe this family, the son with his creepily short arms which are in direct proportion to his talent, and granma looks like she as someone noticed is sucking the life force out of the unborn child, as for the girlfriend i give them a year before we hear the old grown apart but we will still remain friends and raise our child together bullshit. but hey miss alves done hit the child support lottery, now I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but she aint messin with no broke………

  18. pia

    She is the shit for saying that……he has a cool mom!

  19. Suzette

    Thats what drugs do the brain ! Stay away from ‘em. BTW- her son can’t act for shit.

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