Matthew McConaughey and Penelope Cruz have decided to separate. In a joint statement they say they’ve “decided to take time off as a couple. Due to busy work schedules and so much time apart, they mutually decided four weeks ago that separating was the best thing to do at this time.” Plus the stench of weed coming out of McConaughey’s house was probably a little overpowering for Cruz. And sure, the late night nude bongo sessions were fun at first, but it takes a little more than that to keep a woman interested. Although don’t ask me why. I see a naked woman playing with her bongos and she’s won my heart forever. Get it? Bongos? It’s like you’re in eighth grade all over again!
“Who–does–number 2–work for?”
“That’s right, you show that turd who’s boss!”
Ten licks to anyone who can name that movie.
*This offer void for Whipper and/or any of his subsidiaries.*
501, 502
Wasn’t sure if it was the real you, but after the usage and correct spelling of subsidiaries, I’m convinced.
495 is willow, bananas, feed_me, prez, and any other name the fuck-wad can do…
to bad it’s still a ball-less fuck…
*too*
I was banging the Superficial guy a few minutes ago. He asked me to tell you this isn’t a chat room, take it to IM. Your idle chat isn’t entertaining the voyeur in us. Comment on the subject, comment on the comments but shut the fuck up about what you did in the 3 minutes you actually stepped the fuck away from your computer this weekend.
didnt she write emma?
oh you’ve already met
…mr darcy :)
lol bitches :)
#506
you know
some of just dont get im
its like why we cant play
a musical instrument :)
506
true…but after 100 posts, what more can you say about matt and penelope???
at least we see all the ads that keep the site running…
so when you’re done blowing him, ask him to run stories on the weekend…
pt-mail again
jane’s eyre= the real feed me.
haha….yu cant’ hide!!!! :)
p.s.
don’t deny it. you told me yourself via email.
THANK YOU Cruisin. Between that and the fucktard, this site is going to shit. And I hate all that person-to-person sex talk, too. Go to a fucking chat room and jerk off on Lamebananas’ face already.
I’m glad to see people are in on the June 8 protest. There will be many reminders…
#513
what protest ? :))
lol bitch
#487
apparently so
get over yourself
lol bitch :))
LAMEWILLOWTARD, YOU ARE AN AMBIGUOUSLY GAY DUO OF VAPID, HERMAPHRODITIC SCHIZOPHRENIA!!!
YOU MAY ASK YOURSELF ( AS YOU SEEM TO TALK TO YOURSELF OFTEN, FREAKIN’ PSYCHOTICTARD ) HOW DOES MISTER SHRIVELED KNOW IT’S YOU?
MY FREAKIN’ SHRIVELED BALLSACK SHRINKS A LITTLE EACH TIME YOU POST!!!
IT IS MY SINCERE WISH THAT YOUR FREAKIN’ NETHER REGION BE CONSUMED BY CARNIVOROUS BEATNIK FROGS NAMED “HERBIE”, ASSMUNCHTARD!!!
507,
No, Jane Eyre is a book written by Charlotte Bronte. Jane Austin wrote Emma, Pride & Prejudice (THAT’S where Mr. Darcy is from), Sense & Sensibility, and others. Good try though, thanks for playing.
#516
lol dude :))
its called faith man :)
tough shit eh? :)))
Herbie “laughs out loud” an awful lot.
Now, #516 deserves a “lol”!
#517
how did i know
thaat
you
wo u
ld
know that :)
come on
you know the phrase :)
l*********************
521
Uhh, probably because my name’s jane’s eyre. Just a guess.
I just got rid of my Gear magazine 1999 issue with Penelope on the cover and now this…..
Penlopeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Ooooh, Ballsack’s pissed again.
Fake Feed Me-
Please give it up. You aren’t fooling anyone, it is obvious that you aren’t her. We aren’t as stupid as you, sorry to break it to you. I am counting the minutes until your lame ass is banned for good. Grow the fuck up, I know 5 year olds that are more mature and socially acceptable than you. I guess you aren’t getting the fact that all of us hate your fucking guts and wish you a slow, agonizing death. I am sure you don’t give a fuck, but I will try to appeal to that shriveled up little crumb of a conscience and ask you to please either grow the fuck up or leave. You are not welcome here, and we will do whatever we can to get you permanently banned, so leave now with some dignity, for God’s sake. We promise not to talk shit about you once you’re gone, simply because once you’re gone, you will cease to matter. You know, out of sight, out of mind. I am begging you, please just go the fuck away. Bother some other website with your boring ass, lame posts, just leave us in peace. Please.
@426-
I’m in. Just remind us on Wednesday, ok? I cannot take much more of this BS, I have already written to the SF editors or whatever at least 3 times about banning that shriveled ballsack. To the rest of you, please flood the SF with requests to ban this shitstain, if we all band together on this, they will have to listen. Be sure to let them know you will leave for good if IT is allowed to continue it’s childish crap. I would really hate to have to leave for good because of some fuckface that gets his rocks off by ruining shit for everyone else, but if I have to, I have to.
#525. *sarcasm* ;^)
bigjim:
1. I’m down for the protest.
2. I’ve been reading about how hot you are and I WANT to see a pic…
52x
lol guys
paris wanted me to say hello :)
keep the faith :@))
herbiefrog makes me yearn for Xanax. I NEED XANAX!
herbiefrog makes me want to legalize 100+ trimester abortions.
TOPAZ21:
You can see me here: http://profiles.yahoo.com/therealbigjim68
Well, parts of me, at least.
matthew mcconaughey has hair plugs, and i read in People that he makes his own moisturizer…homomuch?
Umm, what are hair plugs? BTW, I don’t think making your own moistuizer makes you gay. Sucking cock when you have your own cock, well, that usually is one of the requirements. But I’m not telling you something you don’t already know.
RE: Hair plugs
Never mind, I looked it up.
531: aah what a tease
Man, DEREK SWANSON… you are fucking ruining this site! Unless you are banned and SOON, it would be my pleasure to forget this site just to be rid of your pathetic ass!! Take a hint: noone wants you here, noone likes you, GET IT?
As far as Thursday goes, count me in! I will also drop a line to the SF editors in hopes that it will help.
Lamefuckwillowwhipperasshole: I hope your nuts (if you have any) get gangrene and you’re gang-raped by a bunch of HIV-infected homoguerillas with 12-inch cocks!!!
I’m so glad they broke up. Back on topic here. Matt is S-M-O-K-I-N hot and deserves to be seen with a lovely lady not one that resembles a duck billed platapus!
He can play naked on my bongos anytime.
No no, not you, Mr Shriveled Ballsack, I love you! I was calling Lameass/Whipped a shriveled ballsack. Dammit, I shouldnt have used that term to describe him/her/it. Sorry for the confusion, I think you are one of the funniest fuckers on this site. Forgive me??
I just had to find out why this story has well over 500 comments. Haven’t been able to figure it out. Too much to read. Can someone summerize?
#501
I’m sure that was Austin Powers, but I can’t remember if it was International Man of Mystery or The Spy Who Shagged Me.
BTW, I can’t believe I actually sat and read every single damn post on this thread.
Ditto, sweetie. Having said that, you all are fucked.
541
Yessssssssssssss! 40 posts later, someone got it! It was International Man of Mystery.
would you like to claim your 10 licks?
In reference to 532
Ah hair plugs, of course. Well that explains it ptprez. So considering those tufts of transplanted hair, perhaps it will be more like six years before he turns into Matthew Grammer…six and a half tops.
That sucks i tought they were so cute together.:(
oh well..