Jason Flemyng Probably Just Confirmed Matthew Vaughn Is Directing ‘Star Wars: Episode VII’

The Superficial / November 28, 2012

Because sometimes I wake up in the morning and just want to write about Star Wars and tits (It’s a living.), above is long-time Matthew Vaughn collaborator Jason Flemyng possibly accidentally confirming to UK movie site HeyUGuys that Vaughn is directing Star Wars: Episode VII as rumored. And since my sex parts are already growing a fine, soon to be dense, layer of dust thanks to this post, let’s just go balls deep with this encouraging-only-to-nerds report via io9 that Star Wars prequels producer Rick McCallum unceremoniously “retired” shortly before the Disney buyout:

Greedo shoots first? Jar Jar? Anakin’s hatred of sand? All these things happened under McCallum’s watch, and I blame him. This is probably irrational, and I don’t care in the slightest.
Oh sure, Lucas generated these horrible ideas, but McCallum was always Lucas’ yes-man, telling him whatever shit Lucas pooped out was gold. Lucas’ previous producers quashed his bad instincts in the original trilogy; McCallum let Lucas do whatever he wanted, and the prequels were the result.

So basically Lucas and anyone who told him, “Why yes, the force is much more mystical when you make it sound like the Jedi have AIDS,” has been systematically removed from the new trilogy. I really don’t want to get my hopes here, but I already drew the Millenium Falcom on my penis. It’s a nervous tic, okay! *runs away crying*